SOPE | Memory

Embarrassed

Yoongi paced nervously around his room, trying hard to think of an excuse to miss lunch. He asked his dad and mom if he could leave, repeatedly, but they said no.

"Hyung? Why don't you want to meet the new neighbors?" Jimin asked, peeking into Yoongi's room.

"Huh? Wha-- no," Yoongi said, caught off guard. "I do, I do. I just... want to... practice extra."

"Oh," Jimin said, sounding unconvinced. He perked up and plopped onto Yoongi's bed. "Eomma said they're coming soon!"

"That's cool," Yoongi said, trying to sound excited. Dread was building up in his stomach and he felt slightly nauseous. "Um, why don't you go help eomma?"

"Okay, hyung!" Jimin said happily, bounding downstairs to help set up the backyard. Yoongi sighed. He really did not want to meet their new neighbors.

"Yoongi! Come help Jimin!"

"Okay, eomma!"

Yoongi quickly tidied up his room and walked downstairs.

He and Jimin set up the table on the patio. Jimin proudly showed him the daffodil he'd been growing.

"Wow, it's so pretty!" Yoongi said, admiring the yellow flower.

"Yeah! I grew it all by myself!" Jimin said excitedly, carefully watering it.

"Come on, let's go check if the food is ready," Yoongi said after Jimin put the watering can back on its shelf.

As soon as they closed the door to the back yard, the doorbell rang. Yoongi's heart dropped.

"Yoongi! Go get the door! Invite them in! You too, Jimin!" their mom said from the kitchen. She was finishing a salad.

"Okay," Jimin said shouted, running for the front door. Yoongi sighed. Jimin opened the door.

Even though Yoongi was staring at the floor, he felt Hoseok standing there. He could sense it. He felt his heart beating too fast and his breaths coming out too quick and loud.

"Hiii!" Jimin said, sounding happy and excited. He immediately bowed respectfully to the four people standing in the doorway.

"Why hello! Aren't you a cute little boy," the two adults cooed over Jimin. Yoongi quickly walked behind Jimin and bowed too.

"Hi, come on in," he said. His voice was shaking a little.

"Aw, you guys are so polite!" the parents kept praising the brothers as they took their shoes off. Yoongi and Jimin's mom came hurrying into the hallway.

"You sillies! Let them in!" she scolded playfully. Yoongi retreated from the doorway as the family came in, already making conversation with Yoongi's mom. Jimin was chattering excitedly with the boy.

"Yoongi," Dawon said softly. Nobody else heard her.

"No, please," Yoongi said quickly, not looking up. He still hadn't looked up at any of them yet. A dull ache began to form in his head.

"You haven't looked up yet," the young woman noted.

"Please," Yoongi whispered, feeling his cheeks turn pink. "I don't want to see him."

"Hi! I'm Hoseok!"

Yoongi cursed at himself and slowly looked up.

Jung Hoseok was the prettiest boy alive.

The boy was wearing tight, black ripped jeans that showed off his perfect thigh muscles. A casual gray t-shirt displayed strong arms and a fit body. Yoongi couldn't look away. Hoseok's jawline had grown from the cute soft U-line to a knife-like V-line. His hair, dyed dark red, looked beautiful hanging over his eyebrows. His lips were pulled into a sunshine smile. That smile was familiar. Those lips were familiar... Yoongi screamed at himself inside. It had barely been a minute and he had already lost his cool. Hoseok's eyes... Yoongi gasped.

The familiar pair of beautiful dark brown eyes took his breath away. He saw only warmth and kindness, and an achingly painful familiarity in those eyes. The dull ache in his head disappeared and he suddenly felt happy. Not like when he made a good shot during a game, but a sense of peace. A sense that he belonged. 

"Um... I didn't catch your name?"

Yoongi sucked in the sound of Hoseok's voice. It was different yet familiar. He hadn't heard a sound so beautiful since... well, since he was thirteen.

"Psst," Dawon hissed.

"Ah! Uh, sorry..." Yoongi said sheepishly, staring at the floor. But not before he caught a flicker of something in Hoseok's eyes.

He was certain that his face was a nice shade of tomato red.

"I'm... I'm Yoongi."

Hoseok didn't reply for a moment, as if in thought. Then he quickly replied, smiling at Yoongi, who was still looking at the floor like it was the most interesting thing in the world.

"Nice to meet you, Yoongi!" he said cheerfully. Yoongi just nodded.

"That's Dawon noona," Jimin announced, grabbing Yoongi's hand.

"Um, okayyy, let go of me, Jiminie!" Yoongi protested. Hoseok laughed. Yoongi stumbled. He couldn't even handle his laugh.

"Hi, nice to meet you! I'm Dawon," Dawon said. Hoseok was watching them. Yoongi looked into her eyes and gave a small, grateful nod. Dawon nodded back and kept her act.

"I'm Yoongi," he said awkwardly.

Jimin left to squeal to Hoseok, dragging the red-head down the hall. 

"Jimin is so cute," Dawon said. 

"Yeah. We adopted him right after-- um." Yoongi broke off, cringing. 

"It's okay, you're strong, Yoongi." 

"I..." 

"You still love him," Dawon stated.

"I--what?" Yoongi stammered.

"You love Hoseok. You can't even look at him while talking! Min Yoongi, I can tell you are in love with Hoseokie, and I know that deep down, he's in love with you. Why can't you agree and help me help him remember?" she said seriously.

"Because," Yoongi said slowly, "I. Am not. Going to hurt Jung Hoseok again." His voice broke on the last three words.

"What are you talking about? You've never hurt him!" Dawon said, frustrated.

"I made him cry! I'm not good enough for him!" Yoongi whispered, feeling tears pricking at his eyes. No, not now, don't cry now.

"What do you mean?! You never made him cry!" Dawon hissed.

"After the fire," Yoongi said, then walked into the kitchen, head down. He's said too much already. He had to keep away from Hoseok.

"You--fire?!" Dawon asked, confused. She stared at Yoongi's back as the realization clicked into place. "You thought he cried because of you." she whispered to herself, the certainty dawning on her. "He cried because he didn't ever want to leave you."

"Dawon noona," Hoseok said. Dawon looked up, startled.

"Yeah, Hoseokie?" she asked. Hoseok looked troubled.

"Do I know Yoongi hyung?" 

The GIF needs ATTENTION right NOW: 

Tongue technology 

Gummy smile 

Suga-ness 

Mint Yoongi 

Beautiful.