SOPE | Memory

Cold

As soon as the sled started slowing, both boys jumped out and landed in the snow on either side. Yoongi got up, face red with embarrassment and anger. Hoseok felt a familiar ache in his head and tried to clear it. 

No, not now, not here. 

But he couldn't shake it off. He bit his lip and stayed standing until Yoongi started walking back up the hill, then fell into the snow again and sat.
He'd thought his headaches might stop for just a few days while they stayed in the cabin, but apparently he was wrong. The cold sharpened everything. The burning smell, the stinging in his breaths, the pain in his head. The brightness of the snow made his eyes ache.
Yoongi didn't look back as he walked up the hill, ready to yell at Jin and Namjoon. He was mad at Hoseok and they knew it. Halfway up the hill, Namjoon barrelled past him, closely followed by Jin. 

"Wha—" he began, but Namjoon either didn't hear or ignored him. 

"Hoseok!" Jin yelled. Involuntarily, Yoongi turned around and saw Hoseok sitting in the snow. Even from halfway up the hill, Yoongi could see that he was shaking. Namjoon reached him and tried to get him to stand. Jin helped. 

Yoongi watched, feeling empty. Once, it would have been him down there, pulling Hoseok up and helping him. It would have been him there caring for him, taking his pain away with gentle words. But not anymore. 

"Hyung?" 

Yoongi turned again and saw Jimin walking carefully down the hill, trying not to slip, with Jungkook and Taehyung in tow. He cleared his throat. 

"Is Hoseok hyung okay?" 

Yoongi stayed quiet. 

"Yoongi hyung! How can you be so mad you don't care about someone you love?" Jimin asked, eyes widening with hurt. 

Yoongi opened his mouth. 

That's not it, Jimin. 

Jimin shouldered past Yoongi. Jungkook and Taehyung hesitated, then followed, muttering quiet sorry's to Yoongi as they passed. 

At the bottom of the hill, Namjoon got Hoseok standing and led him to the cabin. Jin followed, and the three youngest boys brought the sleds inside. Yoongi stayed on the hill, alone.
"Yoongi! Get inside!" came Jin's stern voice. 

Yoongi didn't listen. He didn't want to see Hoseok going through pain again. Especially if Hoseok thought it was Yoongi's fault. It wasn't his responsibility to tell Hoseok the things he'd forgotten.
"Yoongi!" This time it was Jimin's voice. Yoongi sighed and gave into the cold. When he got to the wooden cabin, Jin and Namjoon were crowding around the sofa. The other boys were somewhere else, no doubt shooed away. 

He couldn't help it. He looked. Mistake. 

Hoseok was sitting on the sofa, refusing to let out a sound or lay down. His face was pale and his eyes looked pained. Yoongi looked away quickly. 

"Yoongi, you idiot, what do we do?!" Jin asked, worry filling his voice as he tried to keep it calm.
"I don't know," Yoongi answered, grimacing when it came out a lot quieter than he'd meant.
"I think this might be a bad idea, but I'm leaving you two to it," Jin said. Yoongi blinked. Namjoon was already out of the room by the time he'd processed Jin's words.

"No!" he said frantically, lunging for the door. 

"Yes," Jin said softly, then closed the door. Yoongi groaned. He tried the door. It wasn't locked, but someone was holding it on the other side.
"I'm not helping you," he said dryly. 

"I don't want your help," came Hoseok's quiet reply. Even his voice sounded weak, barely there. Yoongi clenched his teeth. Why did he care? 

"Yoongi, please," came a whisper from behind the door.