My Messed Up Life

I Hate You, I Love You

Sierra's POV

I wake up and I'm not in my bunk like usual; but I'm on the couch with ny head in Jess' lap. I guess we must have fallen asleep like this.

Wow Jess is so hot, while she's sleeping

Wait, Did I just fucking think that? Great not only do I love more than one guy but I have a crush on a girl. My life can't get any worse.

Jess begins to move so I pretend to be asleep.

"God, she's just the most beautiful thing ever when she's asleep, I love her" She mumbled to herself.

"Wait, Jess? Did you just say what I think you said? Do you like Sierra?" Stephen asks. I guess that silly fucker just woke up and came out here at the wrong time.

"Uhhh, no, I-I didn't say anything" She stuttered trying to cover up the truth.

"You do" His voice got low and full of disappointment.

"Look Stephen I don't like her okay?" She paused for a few moments "I love her" She finished.

Wait wait wait wait, what? She loves me? But how, I don't understand I mean I guess I like her but she loves me, great. I waited a few more minutes until I started to move and 'wake up'.

"Good morning Sierra, did you sleep well, are you okay?" She asked referring to the events of last night.

"Good morning Jess, yes I did, and I'm fine"

"Well that's good, I'm going to get breakfast, would you like me to make you anything?"

"Thanks Jess but no, I'm fine, I'm just going to take a shower" I replied and walked towards the shower; I pulled out my phone to check it.

               7 New Messages

Ricky: Sierra I'm sorry, it's not my fault, really

Ricky: She kissed me and I tried to push her off, please believe me

Samantha: Heyy :) ik you like Ricky so I talked to him for you and I'm sorry, but he doesn't like you like that, but the good news is, he likes me I think we're going to go out

Balz: Sierra I know that was you in the distance last night and you saw Samantha kiss Ricky, it hurt you, a lot didn't it? You love Rick don't you? I know because I was the guy who ran away from them and pass you. I love your sister so it hurt like a bitch when they kissed

Chris: Sierra are you ok? You were the girl we saw last night weren't you? I'm sorry your sister kissed Rick I couldn't do anything about it and now Balz is pissed and won't talk to anyone especially Sam and Rick, and Rick won't move. Please talk to them

Ryan: What the hell happened last night? All I know is Ricky was getting ready to go walking with you and then Sam, Balz and Chris were gone, then Balz came running in upset then Ricky did and Sam had a smile on her face

Ghosty :): Hey hun what happened last night, I'm confused

               23 Missed Calls

5 Jess
5 Stephan
5 Sneaky Ninja Fucker
4 Twin Joshy
4 Johnnay

Great I knew that would happen.

to Ghosty :), Ryan: I'm not really sure

to Chris: Ok fine I'll talk to Rick and Balz

to Samantha: Really :( well good for you then :)

to Balz: Really? well I guess we're both hurt huh? well if you wanna talk we can

to Ricky: Sure whatever, why the fuck won't you talk to people, I know you're not really social normally but why are you more anti social than usual?

I hate my life, I hate it. Now they're all going to make me explain and talk and I can't. I'm not going to talk to any of them, I just can't. Ill only talk to Balz because he's hurt like me.

Balz: Ok, do you wanna hang out after the show tonight?

Me: Sure

I finally decide to take my shower. I let the water heat up before I stripped and stepped into the warm water. I stepped out and got dressed as I looked at myself in the mirror.

Why would anyone love you, you're ugly, and fat and a stupid blonde

What I hate most is my blonde hair. I got dressed into my black Of Mice & Men shirt and my black Of Mice & Men, & logo leggings. I slipped on some black Vans. My day has officially started. I walk into the 'living room' everyone but Jess is there.

"Hey guys, where Jess?" I asked

"She said something about walking and Motionless In White" Replied Brian.

Fuck, she told me she'd kill Ricky; was she serious? Is that really what she's doing? All I know is I can't ignore MIW right now when I have a feeling something bad is about to happen.

Ring, ring, ring ... You have reached the voicemail of Jess Bowen

Shit, really Jess?

Ring, ring, ring ... You have reached the voicemail Jess Bowen

ugh I'll try Ricky

Ring, ring, ring ... You have reached the voicemail of Ricky Horror

Ring, ring, ring ... You have reached the voicemail of Ricky Horror

Damn it I don't have time to try all the numbers I have to go now. I ran out the bus as the guys were calling my name but I can't tell them what's happening I don't want them to know because they might hurt him too.

Am I too late?