Life wasnt supposed to be this way. I was supposed to get up on time. I was supposed to shower everyday. I was supposed to get my license at 16. I was supposed to be happy. I shouldnt be this way. Yet all i can think about is the next time i'll be able to feel the burn in my throat after the first shot of alcohol. The feeling of the pills on my tongue. I crave it. I want it to end me. I crave that last breath. Before i fall soundlessly asleep. No more words. No more tears. No more me. I want to end it. So bad. It's getting to be too much. Slowly and slowly until, I break. I can see it now. I'm meant to break before i step out into the world. I'm meant to break and shatter at the floor around me. And maybe. Just maybe. I can't be fixed this time.
