200 Calories - Randy - Book 1

Chapter 9: Page 5

Ryan's pov

I am shaking

Scared of what's going to happen

tears threatening to spill

What's gonna happen?

Why am I so scared?

Well its all because today is the day of the big test, an I am terrified. I have heard voices all night telling me I'm not good enough or I can't do it, but Andy keeps telling me I can. So I tried to believe him but its hard. We are sitting down in class, the teacher walking around handing out all the papers and I am terrified. "Hey, your sweating and shaking, calm down baby" Andy said and held my hand. "Remember what I taught you, and Mikey" He told me and kept holding my hand. "B-But what if you g-get into a class and I-I don't" I said, almost crying. "Believe in yourself baby" he said and kissed my cheek. "Fags" We heard behind us, that was it. I stood up to leave but I got pulled back down into my seat by Andy.

"Mr Bashmore Get out of my class room!" The teacher yelled at Ash, he groaned and walked passed us and slammed the door as he walked out. A tear fell out of my eye and fell on the table. "Hey no, no, no. None of that baby" he said and wiped my cheek. The teacher walked passed and gave me a paper but stopped when she saw I was crying. "Hey Ryan, do you want a minute?" She asked. "No I'm okay, just a little nervous" I answered and she nodded. "Okay well I heard about the Bipolar, so if you need a time out just ask okay Love" She smiled, I nodded and she walked away, giving the others papers.

"I know you will do amazing babe, I have seen the work you can do" He smiled and gave me a quick peck before the teacher told us to start. My hand was shaking as I tried to write but I couldn't. I felt myself having a panic attack but I couldn't stop it, Andy felt it. "Miss he is having a panic attack, can I take him out into the hall?" I heard and ask as I let out a sob. "Yes Andy, you can" She said worried so he helped me stand and I put my arm around his shoulders as we walked out.

We got to the hall and Andy helped me sit against the wall whilst he got a bottle of water from his bag and handed it to me. "Your doing great baby, just keep breathing" He smiled and told me to breath in and out. After a few minutes of panic, I slowly calmed down but I was still shaking a little bit. Andy helped my hold the bottle of water to my lips whilst I got a few sips and pushed it away. The teacher came out and kneeled down next to me.

"Hey Rye, you okay now?" She asked and I nodded not trusting my words. "So I was thinking if you and Andy would like to go into a free office and work in there if that would be less stressful?" She asked, "Yeah maybe that you be better for him" Andy said and ran his thumb over my cheek. I nodded and she smiled. "Okay Andy can you help him to office 205 and I will bring your work in" She smiled and stood up going into the class room. "Come on babe" He said and helped me up and walked me down the hall to the office and sat me down. Soon the teacher came in and gave us our work and soon left.

"Take your time okay because if you rush it, it will not be the best it could be alright" He said and I nodded. We started writing, we were at 2 different ends of the table so we could not copy each other. The time went so quickly and the test wasn't to hard, because I managed to write them all down and when the teacher came back I had finished. "Good Job Rye, I see you have done well" She smiled and walked back out. "See babe, I knew you would do well" Andy smiled and hugged me.

It was now lunch and I felt okay. We were eating in the field and Andy was singing me his new song that he was writing, he was also sitting on my lap as he was singing. It was a good lunch... Until it wasn't. The boys came over and sat with us, I had my arms wrapped out Andy's waist and his back was against my chest. "How do you guys think you did?" Mikey asked. "I think I did well, I got all of them done I just have no clue if they are the right answers" I said. "Rye did really good actually, I'm proud of him" Andy smiled and turned his head up so he kissed me. "Ew, just stop please before I go blind" We heard, I looked up and saw Ash pulling a face.