Save Me

57. Chambler

Molly tries to cope with grieving Tara while the world continues to move around her. She is forced to decide either life or death and where her true home lies.

A few months later...

I awoke, though I had barely slept last night.

I sat up slowly from my bed and lifelessly rubbed my eyes, just staring out of the window as my whole body felt numb.

I pulled myself up with all my strength, got dressed and decided I had to venture outside, if not for me then for my people.

When I opened the door which I only ever did once a day for food as I had virtually no appetite, I saw that instead there were two daggers and a revolver.

I looked around suspiciously, wondering who had placed them there but either way the significance remained.

Whether I wanted to or not, people needed me back out there.

So I sighed, picked up the weapons, fastened them to my holsters and marched downstairs.

When I walked out the door and across the fields, people stared and whispered but they gave me my space.

I was grateful for that at least.

I knew that they had marked the ten graves, just around the side of the house so that was where I walked to first.

Being isolated from the outside world for so long almost made everything seem like one big waking nightmare but I was pulled back to reality when I saw them.

Wooden crosses marked each grave in the row, their names carved into it.

I walked steadily along until I came to Tara's.

I closed my eyes and exhaled shakily as tears rolled down my face.

I dropped to my knees with more strength and control this time, kissed my hand and touched the cross.

I didn't pray, I didn't believe in God, this world kind of took that side out of me but I made a mental promise to her that I would fight and wouldn't rest until that woman was dead.

That's what Tara would want me to do, she would want me to fight and carry on for the sake of others.

As I thought about her, I instinctively held my locket in my hands.

I gasped painfully as the shock hit me that she would no longer be able to reciprocate and the silent love we communicated to each other through this was gone.

Forever.

As I knelt in front of her grave, my mind flickered back to when Cindy came to Hilltop.

~flashback~

I went downstairs, my hair frazzled and my robe dirty as I grabbed an apple.

I prepared to get back to work and pull myself out of grief as hard as I could, but when I saw Cindy walk through the gates, I knew I just couldn't.

Michonne told her to come find me, not having the heart to tell her herself.

Cindy ran up to the house as I just stood at the doorframe with an emotionless expression on my face.

She stopped suddenly.

'Molly, what is it?' she asked knowing there was something wrong.

I bit back my tears and said softly, 'Tara is dead'.

She burst into tears shouting 'no!' as Daryl and Michonne brought her inside to console her.

It was selfish but I couldn't bare to be in that room, I couldn't tell her that everything would be okay because it wouldn't be.