Save Me

17. An End or A Beginning

This would be the night that changed Molly's life forever, for better or for worse. From here on out, whether or not she had fully accepted it, she was Negan's.

I could sense it. Negan was keeping something from me and what made it worse was the fact that Sherry knew.

But I had to be smart, I had to play the long game.

I wanted to just trust him, but after Spencer and Olivia, I just couldn't, no matter how much it killed me inside.

I had plans for today, I was gonna check on the crops, talk to some of the families, help out in the kitchen but I was frozen in place.

My mind was reeling, thinking about what else he could be keeping from me.

But surely it couldn't be that bad since Sherry also knew and kept the secret?

If it was bad, she would tell me because I know her.

I spent hours pondering endlessly, looking out of my window to see people outside talking and transporting stuff.

I could just ask Sherry to tell me, or even Negan but it was safer for them not to know that I knew.

I threw myself back onto my bed, sighing as my head hit the pillow.

What could it be?

There was a sudden knock at the door which made me jump up agitatedly.

When I opened the door, a Saviour was stood there with a vase full of wild flowers which held a single note card in between them.

I looked at him confused just as he said 'delivery from Negan' and put them into my hands and walked away.

I stood there for a moment, stunned. He gave me flowers.

I nudged the door shut with my hip as I went to place the flowers by the window.

They were lavender with some tulips mixed in and smelled sickly sweet.

I picked up the card and unfolded it gently, it read:

                               Forgive me - N

Was he serious?! He expected me to forgive him immediately after he killed two of my friends?!

I asked him to kill Spencer, but still!

And with flowers, does he really think that I'm that type of girl?

The slight smile on my face vanished as I crumpled them up in frustration and chucked them into the bin outside my room.

I'm not a girly girl, I don't wear dresses, I'm not like his wives nor will I ever be and if that's the type of girl he wants, then he definitely doesn't want me.

I'm so conflicted. I want him, I want to be with him and I know how crazy I sound because of what he's done and what he's capable of, but theres a part of me that believes in him.

But I can't take that leap if he's not serious, because if I'm betraying my family, it should be for a damn good reason.

I couldn't stay cooped up in here any longer. If I was left alone with my thoughts anymore, I'd go insane.

I sighed, put on my jacket and combat boots and was ready to head out the door. 

I swung the door open, to find Negan standing there just about to knock on my door with Lucille like he usually does.

'What do you want?' I said tiredly.

'You didn't like the flowers huh?' he said with annoyance.

'Of course not. What kind of girl do you think I am? I'm not one of your wives, alright I don't want pretty things and I'm not gonna fucking forgive you just because you decide to buy me a gift' I said sternly.