Loved // j.g

Enemy

(the thing is I was just listening to enemy the song up there ^^ while I decided to write this chapter so bare w me)
MAKE SURE TO LISTEN TO THAT SONG OKAY😁

Hanna's POV (ignore my typos im lazy asf)

I didn't know what to say of course I miss the old us too.
We were still seated in Jack's jeep, I didn't wanna leave , stay with Jack just stuck in this moment.
He makes me feel secure and safe and happy and just delightful overall. Jack is the best thing that has ever happened to me. I can't believe I can't call him mine anymore due to my own mistakes.
"Jack" I said quietly.
"mhmm" he said looking at me while humming the lyrics to "lion heart" which was lightly playing in the background.
"If you miss the old us why can't we go back to the old us?" I asked with hope in my voice hoping he would agree.
"it's not like you don't know why" he whispered in his raspy deep voice.
Holyshit is it weird everytime he talks i get turned on, his voice is way too sexy without even trying. Like Jack can literally snap at me and I would sit there admiring his voice because it's that hot.
"what are you thinking?" Jack asked snapping me out of my thoughts.
"actually it's kinda weird to tell you, you'd laugh" I said and looked away.
"trust me I won't, you can tell me anything and by anything I mean literally anything" he said in a tone that made me wanna melt, he was being way too nice to me.
"stop with the cheesy shit , actually I was just thinking about your ... uhh--" I wasn't able to finish off because Jack bursted out laughing "my dick" Jack said inbetween giggles.
"OH MY GOD NO" i said and started laughing because of what Jack thinks I was thinking about.
"I was not thinking about your dick" I said pulling on a serious face but as I looked at Jack his face made me laugh and I started laughing once again.
"It's okay babe it's not your fault no one can stop thinking about gilinsky's bombass dick" Jack said and winked at me.
This guy is literally unbelievable.
"I've had enough of that dick anyway love" i said winking back at Jack. I don't even know where all this self confidence came from , I barely made jokes especially about dicks oh my god. I blame Jack.
Jack's jaw dropped and he started laughing like crazy once again holding his stomach, his eyes closing and his smile as big as ever showing off his perfect teeth. Oh god this guy is so beautiful he doesn't understand.
"that was a good one" Jack said finally after controlling his laughter.
"and btw I was thinking about your voice .. whenever you talk I kinda zone out into my own little world because your voice is extremely deep and raspy and straight off sexy as fuck" I said "and oh wait I know this was really weird to confess but who cares life is too short to hide your thoughts" I finished off and I was surprised at my own words.
"holyshit well" was all Jack managed to say and we just sat there looking at each other.
I need to go before something else happens and I know we both won't be able to stop ourselves.
"you can think about what I just confessed but I gotta go, thanks for today .. umm I had fun" i said smiling at him.
"hey that's what a girl tells her date at the end of the day but she doesn't leave without a goodbye kiss thou" Jack said grinning.
"But we aren't dating remember Jack?" I said rewording his own words.
"Ouch, welcome back to reality" Jack said quietly.
"we can at least hug right? No feelings attached right?" I said and leaned in to give Jack a hug and a second later I felt his secure arms wrapped around my body and it was so hard for me to pull away and not kiss his beautiful pink lips.
Jeez the things I have to go through.
I didn't wanna pull away because I missed Jack he made me feel like home, his scent was occupying my mind, my body , my thoughts. fuck.
I quickly pulled away and got out of the car mouthing "bye" as I walked up to my porch with blake's food in my hand.
I gave blake his food and said hi to nicole and everything , it was currently 10pm I was done my homework, done doing everything and I just couldn't fall asleep so I decided to go out on my roof top, all I had to do is open up my window and climb on the ledge and you're like one step away from being on the roof top.
I took my phone with me and Doritos because I love Doritos who doesn't?
I took a blanket with me actually 2 blankets and placed it on the base laying on it and covering myself with the other blanket and if you ask me it was pretty peaceful and just nice to just lay there.
I was just on my phone going through my texts and stuff and my camera roll looking at selfies of me and Jack and all the stupid places we went and pictures of my old hometown and my friends . Not gonna lie I miss New Jersey and my friends I grew up there so that's normal. I've been so busy with my new life I barely talked to anyone backhome.
Suddenly my phone went off and it was a text and I was somehow hoping it was Jack even though he's probably getting high rightnow or doing something like that.
I opened the text and it was actually from Jack. Oh my god guess my wish came true i opened the text :
Jack :"you look all alone sitting up there"
Me : "I was bored and couldn't sleep"
Jack : "actually same"
Me : "Wait how the fuck do you know?"
Jack : "I live right across from you I saw you climb up, not in a creepy way though 😇"
Me : "talk about being a stalker 😅"
Jack : "Naw I just casually glanced out my window and saw you, didn't anyone tell you not to climb up your window wearing only an over sized sweater and your panties😏"
Me : "omg fuck, you saw🙈"
Jack : "I liked what I saw😚"
Me : "Shut up omg"
Jack : "is it okay if I come over there im bored too"
Me : "yes that'd be nice; just find your way up here"
Jack : see ya😁
After that we stopped texting and I was still kinda embarrassed Jack saw me like that but I'm happy he's coming over , he's all I think about yet he's right there we are so close yet so so far.
After about 5 minutes I heard some noise and I got up to see Jack standing at my window ledge with his guitar in his hand.
"mind givin me a hand?" He asked and handed me his guitar and I quickly took it and placed it beside me. I noticed Jack was wearing some sweats and a hoodie and his usual vans and looking as cute as ever and so cozy in his sweats I just wanna cuddle the fuck out of him.
I was so zoned out in my own thoughts I clearly didn't realize what was happening around me.
"HANNA" Jack yelled and I looked to see he almost lost balance , oh my god I'm so stupid "JACK" I yelled back and quickly climbed back to where he was and hugged him tightly .
"oh my god are you okay?" I said and my eyes pooled up at the thought of me losing Jack forever this can't happen.
"I'm fine" he said pulling out of the hug and awkwardly getting away from me.
"uhh sorry I got scared" I said turning around so he doesn't see my tears.
"let's go back up" I said and started climbing up towards the roof.
"I like what I see" Jack said giggling.
Oh lord I should've worn pants this is embarrassing.
I quickly climbed up and gave Jack a hand until we were both up and we both sat on the blanket and I started shoving Doritos in my mouth as Jack sat there adjusting his guitar in his lap.
"what are you gonna play?" I asked curiously.
"I'm gonna sing for you .. I mean im bored anyways" he said and started playing a familiar tone on his guitar and I recognized the song right away it was "enemy" by the weeknd. My absolute favorite
.
.
.
.
.
.
Oh oh, oh oh
So back, I'm so bad, I'm so bad
Can I be honest with you please?
It's really hard for me to speak right now
Girl, I been drinkin' all day
It's been a long week
Can't you tell by my face?
I wanna lose myself between your legs
I wanna make your body shake
Girl, if you drink this fifth, no chase
I promise you'll have nothing to say, nothing to say
Cause the least I deserve this no conversation
I been working all week
I'd rather be your enemy
Than any friend you think I would be
I'm just trying to take you home without a word
Girl I'm just trying to kiss your neck without a word
Girl I'm just trying to lay you down without a word
Girl I'm just trying to get you high without a word
Girl I'm just trying to make you numb without a word
Girl I'm just trying to make you cum without a word
Girl I'm just trying to make you sleep without a word
Girl I'm just trying to let you leave without a word
Without a word
Please, please, please
Let me, let me, let me
Let me, get what I want this time
I forgot what it feels to regret my sins
I need that old thing back baby
You can help me out baby
You remind me of a feeling that I used to have
So I don't know what to expect from you tonight
But I'm not trying to waste nobody's time
I'm just trying to find material, some inspiration
We can put it in a song, if you want
But the least I deserve is no conversation
I been working all week
I'd rather be your enemy
Than any friend you think I would be
I'm just trying to take you home without a word
And I'm just trying to kiss your neck without a word
And I'm just trying to lay you down without a word
And I'm just trying to get you high without a word
And I'm just trying to make you numb without a word
And I'm just trying to make you cum without a word
And I'm just trying to make you sleep without a word
Girl I'm just trying to let you leave without a word
Without a word
Please, please, please
Let me, let me, let me
Let me, get what I want this time
I never fall for a girl like you
I'll never understand what you're going through
But your body wild, and your head game too
You lookin' at my nigga, you can have him too
Cause baby, I ain't cuffing, girl I hope you knew
There ain't nothin' wrong, you can pick and choose
Just don't call tomorrow askin' "what did I do?"
Girl you know what you did, all to blame is you
Now the least I deserve is no conversation
I been working all week
I'd rather be your enemy
Than any friend you think I would be
Jack finished singing and I was literally speechless his voice was so fuckin hot and sexy at the same time. I just sat there speechlessly and he covered the weeknd's song and made it sound better than the original song I didn't even think that was possible. The lyrics made me blush slightly because Jack was looking directly at me while singing and I just sat there staring back him wondering how he sounds so fuckin amazing.
"You honestly sound so good. Your voice is really really amazing Jack" I said with full honesty.
"So I've been told" Jack said proudly smirking at me.
"asshole" I muttered under my breath.
"sooo.." I begun.
"say it" he said raising his eyebrow as if he could read my mind and he knew I wanted to say something.
"why'd you choose that song?" I asked curiously hoping to get an honest reply.
"I don't know I was feelin it" he just said casually shrugging his shoulders.
"Naw, is this whole thing suppose to be full of double meaning or something?" I asked because the lyrics implied to mine and Jack's current position we were in as a relation.
"Stop" Jack said simply battering his eyelashes and looking away instantly .
I knew he was trying to change the subject but I wanted to talk about this. I wanted to talk about us.
"stop what?" I asked bluntly.
"this" he said raising his hands in the air.
"what am I suppose to do Jack, you tell me? Don't you get it I still fuckin l--" I started but I was cut off to the sound of Jack's phone going off.
He looked at his screen and hesitated before picking up the phone and placing it against his ear.
I guess it was a girl , or someone Jack didn't want me to know about.
"yeah"
"how have you been love?"
"I'm sexy as always hahaha"
"Ofc not more sexier than you babe"
"Uhh, im just here chilling"
"yeah sure are you okay?"
"hm text me the address asap I'll be there soon lovely stay safe bye see ya"
Jack said that and hung up.
I didn't even ask who he was talking to just thought he'd explain before he leaves me rightnow.
"that was Jasmine, her car broke down, I need to go pick her up, is that okay with you?" He asked casually raising his brow.
"why do you need my permission it's not like we're dating or anything?" I spit out and it came out more harsh than I planned it to be.
Oh well.
"jesus, chill the fuck out, I was asking because I'm just chilling with you atm so yea didn't think it was okay to just leave, talk to me when you're not all pissy about the past , holy fuck" Jack said bluntly getting up from where he was sitting taking his guitar in his hand and make his way down my rooftop and I just sat there looking out in space with a blank less expression on my face.
Yeah I get it im an emotional wreck but when did Jack become so heartless, he can't just yell at me like that, im not used to this side of Jack. I guess I'm getting to know the side of Jack I only heard about from people around him.
.
.
I was currently in bed laying there staring at the ceiling as pia mia played quietly on my phone. I was just tired and really confused and just really exhausted.
I haven't seen Jake in a long time and I kind of miss seeing him , we go way back so it's normal to miss him right? Just as a friend obviously, we are so over the love stage and are moved on with our lives.
It's so weird how two people love each other so much, share everything , so special shit for each other, make each other happy, notice the little things about one another and then BAAM a bad thing happens and that all goes down the drain. Those two people stop talking , no more emotions , no feelings , just blunt as fuck. It's weird. Love is weird as fuck.
I pushed all these thoughts away and texted Jake to meet me afterschool so we can chill and just talk you know, have fun and enjoy.
I still fell asleep with Jack in my thoughts, I miss texting him goodnight, I miss everything about him, his arms around me as I fall asleep, his scent , just everything.
It was currently 1am and I still did not fall asleep, I missed Jack I don't know why I just did and I was feeling so down for no apparent reason , I hate depending on others for my happiness but I can't help it , Jack is different , he's out of the ordinary.
Without thinking about the consequences i dialed Jack's number and my heart started beating really fast when the bell start ringing through the line.
after about 3-5 bells Jack picked up .
"Hello?" He said in a sleepy tone and I just stayed quiet , listening to his voice , I missed his voice.
"hanna you there?" He said sounding annoyed.
"Jack" was all I simply said , it came out very quietly I doubt he even heard me.
"yeah, it's 1am why the fuck would you call me is everything good?" He asked with concern in his voice this time and it made my heart skip a beat.
I know he cares about me.
"I'm sorry I woke you up, I'm fine , everything is fine , no actually I'm not fine , im too far from being fine , im fuckin torn Jack , im fuckin feeling deadly inside , I fuckin love you , you don't get it, you consume my fuckin thoughts all the time, I can't stop thinking about you and your stupid smile and your stupid fuckin dimple and your fuckin laugh and just you in general. You might think I'm fucked up but I don't care Jack you can leave me , but just know I would always love you , I hate you but I hate myself more for loving you so fuckin much. You make me feel nice , you are like my ray of fuckin sunshine, jesus this is so cheesy and you're probably not even gonna talk to me after this but I'm sorry I just missed your voice that's why I called you at this time. I'm sorry for being a fuck up. I'm just sorry if I ever do anything with myself just know I love you so much Jack" i said all the emotions I've been feeling lately and it felt good to let it all out even though I know I made a huge mistake saying all this , my voice started breaking at the end and I just hung up before Jack could say anything and I just laid in bed crying and crying , my whole body was spinning , everything become blurry , I was feeling numb suddenly , it was like everything is just one big blur.

.

.

leave a vote and your thoughts lmao😇