Septiceye/Iplier/Sides One-Shots

Happy Easter from the Egos/Sides!

"Listen here, Edgelord! Don't just expect me to willingly hide eggs for the purpose of what? 'Entertainment'? They're fricking children!"

The glitchy screech bounced off the walls as Anti crossed his arms and sat on top of the kitchen island.

"Ah, but Anti. I know how much you love Easter, right? It would be fun." Dark's echoing voice countered as he leaned against the oven.

Anti pointed a finger at Dark, "You're a fricking emo teenager and you are participating in this?!"

"We all are, bro."

Anti spun around, glaring at Chase, who was wearing a headband with bunny ears. Chase was currently dying eggs with many of the other egos.

Anti groaned, "No. No Easter. It's stupid!"

"Have you even actually celebrated it, Anti?" King asked, currently dipping his egg in peanut butter.

Anti hissed, "Of course not! What do I look like, a child?"

"You look like you need a break. Chillax. Enjoy your fam." Bing piped up from where he was next to Chase, the duo helping each other create an army of "Egg Brochachas"

"Now don't you go shortening the word family by removing my three favourite letters." Patton said, currently dipping his egg into a light blue color.

"Yes. That would not be 'lit' as the kids say." Logan uttered, receiving confused looks from everybody.

"Looking up definition of: lit," Google chimed, his eyes glowing blue

"Okay Google, nevermind." Silver muttered, and Google's eyes stopped glowing as he went back to painting some sort of mosaic on his egg.

"I'm not your 'family' anyway," Anti grumbled, crossing his arms.

"That's because you're a glitch bi-" Jackaboy started, before his mouth was covered by Marvin.

"Zhe doctah is back in zhe house!" A German voice called from the front door.

"And with candy!" Dr. Iplier called.

"And zhe coffee," Dr. Schneeplestien pointed out.

"COFFEEEEEEE!" Remy screamed, running out of the room and towards the doctors.

"Don't doctors know coffee isn't good for you?" Virgil questioned.

"Ah yes, Panic! At the Everywhere. Coffee is not good for you." Roman nodded along, but was honestly not paying attention.

It's not good, but the Irish are obsessed, Jameson signed to the group, most of which understood his sign language.

"Ah, yes my dapper darling," Wilford smirked, "Just as I am obsessed with you."

Jameson's skin turned bright red as he gently smacked Wilford's arm.

"Ten points to whoever can guess why my egg is dripping yellow everywhere," Bim said, frowning as he studied his egg.

"That there's yer problem," Ed said, pointing to where the egg was cracked and seeping yolk.

"EGG JIM HAS BEEN MURDERED!!!" RJ yelled from under the table, CJ pointing the camera at Bim's face.

"Shells are like hard hats. They're supposed to protect," Randall nodded, knocking his knuckles on his yellow hard hat.

"I thought your skull was like a shell?" Yandere wondered, currently sitting themselves in Randall's lap.

"Wh-what d-do y-you mean?" Eric stuttered.

"Your skull could crack open and splatter your brains everywhere," Remus grinned.

"He's lying." Deceit muttered, not even looking up to know Eric had a look of pure terror on his face.

Yandere shrugged, "No, no. Remus has a good point. I had to shatter Boobs Mackenzie's skull, and it was so easy! It was practically as sturdy as an egg shell!"

"The Host highly doubted Yan's logic, but would not argue with them for they were concealing a kantana under the table." The Host narrated.

"See, I wish I had a kid like that!" Derek yelled, before sighing, "Be less of a disappointment than Eric."

"What's even happenin' 'ere?" Yancy asked from where he was sitting a bit off.

"No clue," Illinois shook his head, seated beside Yancy.

"Get used to it. This is your life now." Dark said, suddenly appearing by the two.

"Ya know, this painting brings me back," Shawn said, dipping his egg in black dye.

"To when you were stuck in the video game?" S34N wondered.

Shawn nodded, "It's a chaos back there... But the ink is drying up."

"Robbie and I are gonna watch Steven Universe, anybody care to join?" Picani asked, the zombie by his side in the doorway.

"Nah, you guys have fun," Remy said, having returned with his coffee.

"NONE OF THIS IS FUN!" Anti yelled, now laying on the kitchen island.

"Glitchy Jim is very loud, Jim." RJ muttered, receiving a middle finger from Anti.

"And uses his hands in different ways," CJ pointed out.

"I flicked you off, idiots," Anti growled.

"They weren't talking about you flipping them off," Dark grinned, Anti grimacing in disgust.

"Where are our creators? I still haven't finished my interview with Markimoo!" Wilford whined, Jameson gently patting his back.

"Oh, zhey vill be here soon. Jack vas finishing a collab vith his Irish friends." Schneep said as he passed around coffee.

"Yeah, and Mark's recording for Unus Annus." Iplier told them, giving each ego and side a bag of candy, reluctantly giving two to Wilford.

"Where's Thomas?" Patton wondered aloud.

"Not sure," Virgil muttered, Roman gently hugging the anxious side.

"He's fine," Logan argued, "I believe he is with Joan."

Remus grinned, biting into a tube of deodorant, "Or maybe he's finally taken up my offer to jump out of a moving car!"

The Light Sides cringed, Deceit merely rolling his eyes.

"I don't get any of you Americans." Anti muttered, glitching off the kitchen island.

"You're not planning on hiding eggs then?" Dark wondered.

Anti grinned, pulling out his knife, "I'm just going to do a little Easter stabbing. It's great for publicity."

"Oh, so now you want to celebrate?" Wilford complained, pulling out his gun and waving it around.

Anti rolled his eyes, "I'm not celebrating. Besides, none of you even have a rabbit."

Marvin grinned, standing up. Anti glared at him, "Don't. You. Dare."

Marvin aimed his wand at Anti, who was too slow to glitch away, and got hit with the blast. Once the smoke cleared, a white, green-tinted rabbit was hopping around on the ground.

Marvin casually walked over, picking up the rabbit, holding it up to his face, "Aw, see Anti! You're already a part of the Easter tradition."

A/N-

I had soooo many drafts of this chapter before I finally ended on this ending.

I hope you enjoyed this Easter One-Shot. Did I get all the egos in there? Did I miss one? Just tell me so I can quickly add a part.

Thank you for reading, and have a great Easter!