You're Not Enough

Chapter 13

I was not planning on coming to the cafeteria, but I won't feel so pathetic eating lunch by myself because Violet is with me. Just me and her sit at the table. I can see Ryder and the rest of the football team, along with a couple of cheerleaders across the cafeteria. Ashely is sitting on his lap. His hand is wrapped around her waist, and she keeps giggling into his neck.

It really is a disgusting sight, but I can't tear my eyes away. That is until a tray slams onto our table, and I'm unglued from the sight.

"Hey, bitches," James says. He has on a buttoned-down white shirt with tight black leather pants. His haircut is low, and he has on massacre and eyeliner, with a little lip gloss.

"Hey, J," Violet says, smiling. I guess their friends.

"Ok, let me just say how disrespectful and homophobic Brooks is. No shade to you, Vi, but why couldn't I have been partnered with a guy. How does he expect me to write a love novel with a girl?" he complains; "I mean, come on, we are recreating the love story that gave birth to every love story." He says passionately.

"I know, but I mean, at least you got partnered with me; you could've had one of those stuck up blondes over there." Her head turns back to the cheerleaders that are sitting across the cafe.

"True that," James responds. He looks at me.

"Jayda, girl, let me just say I was not expecting that smack this morning," He says, amused, "And thank you cause I thought I was going to regret coming to school early." I smile, "Next; you need to smack Ryder; even though he's hot as hell, he's disrespectful as shit."

"Yeah, what he said in English was uncalled for. I mean ugly, really. You're far from ugly." Violet assures me. I smile at her words also.

"You look better than his girlfriend. I mean a thousand times better, and that's a fact; I mean, look at your curves. I would kill for an ass like yours." James continues. A light laugh falls from my lips.

"He was looking at it too." He raises an eyebrow.

"Who? Ryder?" I ask. He couldn't possibly have.

"It's true," Violet confirms.

"When you were walking up to the front of the class, he was looking. Ashely even smacked his arm, trying to break his gaze from you." Violet says.

"I swear I saw a smirk on his face when you went all poetically deep on us." the feminine boy says.

"I really don't care."

They both roll their eyes and look at one another, grinning.

...

"May I be excused?" I ask my science teacher. She nods her head, and I exit the class. I needed to get out of there. Theyre dissecting frogs, and it stinks.

I look down at the razor I managed to swipe and put into my pocket. I can't go any longer without cutting. I can't, and this stupid rubber band isn't helping.

I walk down the hall towards my locker after entering my combination. I look at the razor one more time then throw it into my bookbag. I hear a locker close just down the hall; its Ryder. My heart starts racing. I need to go before he sees me. I don't think I can handle another insult.

Wait, there's no one around. So if he insults me, I wont be too embarrassed. This would be a good time to ask him about our project. I need to know now if he's going to do it with me or not. If he refuses to do It with me, Mr. Brooks will have to give me a new partner, or maybe he'll let me work alone. Before my mind realizes what it's doing, my feet are already moving.

When I walk up to him, he doesn't even acknowledge me. I know I'm short, but I'm not that short. He digs through his locker, still not looking at me. I know he knows I'm standing here. I open my mouth to speak, but nothing comes out.

I try it again. "Excuse me." The words come out softer than I wanted them to. He stops, digging in his locker, and his head snaps towards me. I find myself taking a step back at his reaction. He raises both of his eyebrows, causing his eyes to go wide. He is asking me what I want without saying it. "So um,...are you umm Uhh." I can't get the words out what is wrong with me.

"Come on, Jayda, spit it out. I have shit to do." He slams the locker after pulling out his black leather jacket and turns to me. His eyes are directly on me, burning into mine; his eyes dont look green like they usually do; they look grey today, almost like diamonds.

"Are you going to do the project with me?" I blurt out.

"No." He answers fast.

"Why not?"

"Because I don't want to do it with you." He shrugs his shoulders.

"Well, I don't want to do it with you either, but I have to." I snap back, surprising myself.

"How about you just do it yourself, and I'll put my name on it." He gives me the fakest smile then walks around me.

That's actually not a bad idea. Mr. Brooks will never have to know, and I will never have to work with his ignorant ass.