You're Not Enough

Chapter 22

Ugh, my head is killing me. I can't even open my eyes. They're so heavy.

My alarm has been going off for ten minutes now; I need to get up and turn it off. I slowly get off my bed and walk over to my desk. When I swipe the button across, the alarm turns off.

I wonder if my dad is up. I want to check on him to see if he's alright, but I'm scared—memories of last night's flood my mind. I don't remember everything I said, not word for word, at least. But I remember the just.

I walk into my bathroom and look at myself in the mirror. My eyes are as red as a tomato. I reach into the drawer and grab my eye drops. I hate doing this.

I tilt my head back and open my eyes as wide as I can; I squint hard when the drops fall into my eyes.

After keeping them close for like a minute, I open them to see the result. They're not as red as before, I've done this before, so I know my eyes will look normal in a few more minutes. I undress and hop into the shower.

I've decided to wear my ripped jeans along with my red long sleeve crop top. I'm wearing my hair down today. It looks bigger than usual. I know my mother would disapprove of the wild, untamed look.

But she isn't here, sadly.

She is probably going to call me today. Should I tell her about dad getting drunk?

No, he'll tell her...hopefully.

Even if he doesn't, I won't say anything.

I know she'll get mad, and I don't want her to stay away longer. I need to bring them together, and me telling her surely will tear them apart even further. I grab my book bag and head downstairs. I find my dad dressed in his black suit, leaning over the counter with a bottle of water in one hand and his cellphone in the other. He acknowledges me.

"Jayda, are you alright?" He asks. I don't look at him.

"Yes." I walk over to the door.

"Look, I'm sorry about yesterday, everything you said... I didn't... I didn't know you felt like that."

How could you? You're never around.

He continues. "I'm sorry, I really am." His eyes begin to water. It looks like he is about to cry. But he's holding back his feelings, just as he always does.

Just as men always do?

People say that women are overly emotional beings, but in my opinion, it really is men, or at least they are equally as emotional as us. Men mask their true emotions because if they express them, they will be labeled the same as women are... emotional wrecks.

So how could we be labeled as overly emotional when we have nothing to compare to?

So are women really over emotional beings? Or is it Men?

"We should go," I say to him.

...

I decided to skip my first-period class. Not only because I don't want to see Ryder, but I have to work on this first chapter.

I know the characters are Ryder and me. Well, not us exactly but our names. I wonder why he chose our names. Ironically, his name starts with an R, and mine begins with a J.

Unpopular and popular is a really good plot, but I feel like it's overused.

Almost every teen romance movie or book is about the popular bad boy and loner girl. Or it's the geek boy and cheerleader girl. We need something different. Something unique.