Chasing the Sun (COMPLETE)

chapter thirteen

Indigo

I watched the waves crash violently against the shore as the party inside only seemed to grow louder. I folded my arms over my chest, trying to calm my own waters and shield myself from the night air. It was 1am and I was completely over this party, even though it was technically now my birthday. That didn't mean as much to me now as it used to.

Josie had a countdown to my birthday as the clock struck midnight and I put on a brave face as I knew she was plastered and wouldn't have done this sober. Everyone took a shot for me while I pretended with the water in my cup. Once the crowd settled, I snuck out the back door and onto the patio. I wanted nothing more than to curl up in my bed and just pass out.

All I could think about was the fact that Skye would love this. He would have loved the countdown and the shots. He would have loved every ounce of attention he was given because that's just who he was. Or that's who I thought he was. After the incident, I wasn't sure I even knew him at all.

"Blue?" I looked up, my vision blurry. Harry was making his way over to me, a red solo cup in his hand. I swallowed, wiping at my eyes and cheeks. He settled in next to me, taking a sip out of the cup, his focus completely on the ocean in front of us, "What are you doing out here? Isn't this party for you as well?"

"Uhm yeah, I guess I'm not a huge fan of birthdays anymore." I shrugged, sniffling slightly. Harry's eyes met mine, his eyebrows pulling together. I was cursing myself as my eyes just wouldn't dry up and tears kept slipping down my cheeks.

"Are you okay?" God dammit, Harry why did you have to ask me that. I felt my lip quiver, my eyes flooding over once more. Harry's eyes widened at my reaction to his question and he pulled me into his side, his hand rubbing up and down my arm as I felt myself completely losing all composure, "Shit, I'm sorry Blue. I didn't mean to make you cry."

I probably looked ridiculous, gasping for air like a fish so that I wasn't sobbing into Harry's side. Neither of us said anything as I did my best to just settle down enough to not look like a complete mess in front of someone I met only a few weeks ago. All of Josie's friends were going to think I was crazy at this point.

"Uhm, I'm sorry for that. I wasn't expecting to...break down like that. It's been a long day." My voice was so shaky, wavering with each word as I pulled away. I wiped beneath my eyes, black smears now on my fingers. I could only imagine I looked like a super sad raccoon at this point.

"Birthdays are not your cup of tea, no need to be sorry about crying. It's your birthday and you can cry if you want to." I felt the smile creep on my lips at his song reference, shaking my head. He just started singing the song from there, his voice high pitched and shaking his hands about. A chuckle burst from my lips as Harry stopped, giving me a smirk.

"Thanks for that. Although, your singing is mediocre at best." His mouth dropped open, his hand on his chest as he pretended to be offended.

"That's a bold statement coming from one of the saddest raccoons I've ever seen." I hit his shoulder playfully, both of us laughing now. His laugh was loud and obnoxious but in the best way. It was definitely a laugh I'd never forget.

"Okay, I had that one coming," I said, pursing my lips to the side as Harry winked at me before taking another sip of his drink. He offered it to me but I shook my head, politely telling him no thank you.

"You don't drink?" I shook my head again, sighing as my eyes drifted back to the sea.

"I stopped drinking once I dropped out of college. Personal choice." Harry leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees as he just nodded at my statement.

"So why aren't you a fan of your birthday?" I bit the inside of my cheek, unsure exactly how to address his question because I didn't always hate my birthday. I usually loved my birthday because I spent it with Skye. But now, the day just seemed like any other shitty day.

"I usually am. This year is just different because....well my brother isn't here and we always celebrate together." I felt my chest clench at the mention of Skye out loud. I had done my best to avoid talking about him, other than to Josie of course. My parents had avoided mentioning him all together after that day, all of us just walking around like zombies and speaking only when necessary.

"He couldn't come tonight? I'm sure he wanted to." I sighed, realizing that Harry didn't completely understand the situation. How could he? I looked up at him, giving him a small smile as I felt tears welling in my eyes again.

"I don't know if he wanted to be. I think he'd still be here if he wanted to be." Harry just looked completely lost by this, tilting his head at me.

"He was in Malibu? Did he leave before your birthday? I'm confused." Bless his sweet heart. I knew my answers were vague and I kept them that way on purpose. I didn't want to see the pity in his eyes when I told him. Everyone in my hometown gave me that look; in the grocery store, my job, even people I didn't know on campus gave me that look. I didn't need it from him too.

"Uhm no, he wasn't here. We'd talked about coming here to see Josie a few times but never made the trip together. Skye was my twin brother and I never thought he'd miss a birthday. I miss him, a lot." I felt my voice breaking as I did my best to explain what I could. I watched Harry's face fall, eyebrows knitting together with each word.

"You said was. He was your brother." I opened my mouth to answer his question but was interrupted by Josie bursting through the back door. Her eyes were glassy and not from crying. She gave us both a lazy smile before stumbling over to sit next to me, laying her head on my shoulder as she began to hiccup.

"Harry your psycho girlfriend is looking for you." Josie hiccuped. I met Harry's eyes, watching his confused demeanor turning to an exhausted one. He sighed, running his hand over his face before giving me a half ass smile.

"Well, I guess that's my cue. Uhm, I'm sorry about your brother, Blue. Hopefully this birthday won't be as bad as you think." I nodded, giving him a closed mouth smile as I watched him walk off.

"You told him about Skye?" Josie looked at me with wide eyes and I just sighed, shaking my head.

"Not exactly." She seemed satisfied with this answer, laying her head back on my shoulder. It wasn't long before I heard her snoring. I pulled her phone out of her pocket to text Lucas to help me get her to bed.

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she almost told him