Just Imagine...

No Fights Allowed (Unless They're Tickle Fights)

{note from the author: this one will be a little silly but just please... bear with me. This fic is purely self-indulgence.}

The Torchwood team, especially the original six members, could get a little wild sometimes. It was only because they'd known each other for so long. They were comfortable letting loose in front of each other. They didn't get mad at each other for minor things anymore, not really anyway. But to Ianto, he'd rather make Sam or Jack or Gwen really mad than face what happened when he 'slightly annoyed' them. Toshiko and Owen weren't so bad. Sam would have to be the worst. This all started quite a few years ago, when Torchwood three was still based in Cardiff. Ianto had been working late, still a little sore after the cannibals incident as he tidied up the desks. He hadn't realized Sam was there until she emerged from the dim shadows of the hub like a lioness stalking her prey.
"Hey, what're you doin' here so late?" She asked, making him jump.
"I could ask you the same thing." He muttered.
"I was just checking on that dragon we got in today," Sam said, "they're really quite something, dragons, aren't they?" Ianto nodded. "You still haven't answered my question," Sam added, "why are you here so late?"
"Just tidying up." Ianto said, picking up an old rusty coin from Sam's desk.
"Well don't get rid of my good luck charm!" Sam exclaimed, taking it back from him.
"Your what?" Ianto asked.
"My good luck charm. When I was sixteen I was at a really low time in my life, and one day while I was walking the streets I found this little coin. I picked it up, and... I dunno, I guess it keeps me from doing bad things to myself. Drinking. Smoking. I just started getting lucky."
"Oh, so that's where it all started."
Ianto was smirking now.
"You know I didn't mean that kind of luck!" Sam exclaimed indignantly, but she was smiling a little.
"I know, I know," Ianto laughed softly, "because that would be one tired coin!" Sam's eyes gleamed and she suddenly looked predatory in the dim lights of the hub.
"Get over here, you loon." She murmured. Ianto took a step back, Sam was starting to scare him. She took a step closer and Ianto ran, though he could hear her following and knew she was faster than him. She caught up to him by the couch, her hands coming down hard on his shoulders so that he fell onto the cushions. Ianto waited as she held him down, half expecting her to beat him like the cannibals (and other people he'd rather not think about right now), but instead her touch was gentle as she placed her hand in the centre of his stomach.
"I've been meaning to ask you," Sam murmured, "are you ticklish?"
Oh no, Ianto thought, but it was too late. Sam had already started tickling him all over his torso. Ianto laughed so hard he could've sworn he was going to die. After that day that was how Sam seemed to deal with being teased or having her things stolen or similar minor annoyances; tickle fights. Then Jack got in on it too. Gwen and Toshiko would always squeal like little girls, and sometimes they even tried to provoke Sam or Jack. Ianto never did, though. Neither did Owen, but then again, he never took part in Sam's little 'game'. He would say it was childish and storm off to the autopsy bay to ignore everyone, while Ianto would try to stay out of the way so he wouldn't get roped into it. It wasn't like he couldn't hold his own, but he wasn't the type to get into fights he already knew he couldn't win.
That had changed slightly a few years later, after the move to Saint Lucia, when he'd caught Gwen messing with his coffee machine.
"Gwen?" He said, and she jumped, turning to look at him. She grinned nervously.
"Oh, hi Ianto," she said, "I wasn't doing anything, I was just..." she started backing up but Sam appeared around the corner behind her, eyes glinting madly. Jack walked up from the direction of his office, hands in his pockets and a wide grin on his face. Gwen giggled nervously as she seemed to realize what was going to happen. Owen and Toshiko were out for lunch and the rookies had the day off, there was no one there to rescue her.
"Get her!" Sam exclaimed teasingly. Gwen bolted, darting between Ianto and Jack. They gave chase, Sam right behind them. Without quite realizing what he was doing, Ianto grabbed Gwen's arms as he fell back on the couch. Jack's blue eyes lit up as he saw the opportunity this presented and held down her legs.
"Nononononono," Gwen pleaded, still giggling.
"Gotcha!" Sam taunted, jumping onto the back of the couch.
"Sam-" Gwen began, but it was too late. Sam pounced on her like a tiger and she squealed loudly before lapsing into hysterical laughter as Sam started tickling her sides. Ianto and Jack held onto her tightly so no matter how much she wriggled she couldn't get away. Gwen was just starting to wonder how much more of this she could take when the cog wheel door rolled open and Owen and Toshiko returned.
"What's going on here?" Owen demanded as Gwen was finally allowed to sit up. She wiped tears of laughter from her eyes, catching her breath.
"We're just playin' around, Owen." Sam said, jumping off the couch. Gwen thought about trying to get even with her or Jack, but that was probably a bad idea. Sam and Jack were absolutely ruthless when it came to tickle fights, she knew that very well. She could always try to get Ianto, but as far as she knew, Ianto wasn't ticklish.
"Idiots." Owen grumbled, stalking off to his desk.
"Oh, what?" Jack demanded.
"The four of you," Owen responded angrily, "you could be doing something important but instead you're having a tickle fight like a bunch of kids."
"Like you're not ticklish." Ianto muttered.
"I'm not," Owen said, a little too quickly, "and even if I was, it's none of your business."
"Ooh, he is." Sam laughed quietly, nudging Jack.
"No I'm not." Owen said sternly, but it was no use, Sam was already creeping towards him with an evil grin.
"Whaddya think, Tosh?" Gwen asked, "is he ticklish?"
Tosh nodded.
"He won't admit it, but I can't kiss his neck without him giggling." She whispered.
"I'm warning you, Sam," Owen growled, "don't come any closer or I'll hurt you."
"Why?" Sam snickered, "scared?" She weaved around his desk, "I mean really I should be the one who's scared - if I'm wrong it'll just be embarrassing for me."
"Fuck you." Owen hissed before turning and running away from her.
Sam gave chase and Jack let out an excited laugh, clearly enjoying this. Gwen noticed Ianto slipping off to the side  and figured he was just trying to stay out of it, which was why she was surprised when he intercepted Owen, wrapping his arms around him from behind and reaching up to tickle his neck.
"DAMN YOU IANTO!" Owen yelled through hysterical laughter as the two of them crashed to the floor in a tangle of thrashing arms and legs.
Sam skidded to a halt in front of them, momentarily surprised, before she grinned again and used her weight to pin the two of them down and tickle them both at once.
Jack laughed maniacally and practically dove into the pile, mostly targeting Ianto.
"DON'T DON'T DON'T-" Ianto pleaded as Jack's fingers crept up to the backs of his knees, but Jack wasn't listening. Ianto finally relented on Owen's tender neck, laughing so hard he snorted.
"Oh yeah, payback time!" Owen said, pushing Sam off of him so he could twist around and tickle the back of Ianto's other knee. Sam sat back where she was, chuckling at Ianto's struggle.
"SAM, HELP!" Ianto screamed, but Sam just folded her arms over her chest, raising an eyebrow and beaming.
Tosh and Gwen, meanwhile, were whispering to each other, and suddenly leaped into the middle of the fight. Tosh jumped onto Owen's back and they rolled over together, Owen trying to swat Tosh's hands away from his neck, but to no avail.
"Shouldn't've worn sock feet, Jack!" Gwen taunted, pinning his legs down from behind. Sam caught on to what she was doing and crawled over to help her in tickling Jack's feet. Jack screeched with laughter, immediately letting Ianto's leg go as Ianto saw an opportunity to go for his belly.
Tosh, on the other hand, had Owen pinned to the floor, trying to wiggle her fingers between his jaw and shoulders to get at his neck and collar bone, but Owen kept scrunching up and squirming to avoid her.
"Oh, fuck this, I can't take it!" He exclaimed finally, giggling, and thrust his hands up to Tosh's underarms. Tosh squealed.
"Owen! Stop it!" She gasped, trying to grab his wrists.
"OKAY STOP! I GIVE, I GIVE, PLEASE!" Jack howled across the room, unable to fight off Sam, Ianto, and Gwen at once. His three attackers sat back as Tosh finally locked her fingers with Owen's to get him to stop tickling her.
The six of them lay on the floor for a few minutes, all breathing hard.
"That... was the stupidest thing... we've ever... done!" Owen panted after a moment.
"Oh, shut up," Ianto chuckled, "you know that was fun."