Beautiful Goodbye (COMPLETED)

Chapter 51: I'm sorry

Bella's POV

I can't sleep that night, my guilt is eating me alive, knowing that I've hurt Liam and the thought that he's under the same roof but we're not together, kept me awake. I tossed and tossed in my bed trying to find the perfect position for me to fall asleep but to no avail.

I finally surrendered and went downstairs to drink a glass of water, when I saw mom.

"Can't sleep?" tanong ni Mom.

"Yeah." Sagot ko sabay inom ng tubig.

"Talagang hindi ka makakatulog knowing na sinaktan mo ang taong tunay na nagmamahal sayo." She said.

"Mom please, not now." Sabi ko.

"I was also in your position years ago. Aspiring designer but then I had to marry your dad when I got pregnant with your Kuya Alfred. You guys were the best thing that ever happened to me. I didn't regret any single moment of my life." Sabi niya.

"Mom, magkaiba tayo. I'm not pregnant, so I have a choice." Sabi ko.

"And you chose to break his heart." She said sadly.

I felt a sharp pain in my chest and my heart was suddenly filled with guilt.

"Whatever your choice in the future, I'm sure Liam deserves an explanation. You should apologize to him." Sabi ni Mom and damn, I know she's right.

"Okay Mom, thank you for your advice. I really appreciate it." Sabi ko.

I gathered all my courage to go to his room and knock on his door. Walang sumagot. I decided to turn the doorknob and saw that it was not locked.

I went in and saw him lying on his bed, his arms covering his eyes. Linapitan ko siya and laid beside him. He's only wearing his boxers, as usual. Humiga ako sa dibdib niya at tiningala siya.

Mukhang tulog na siya pero nakita kong tumulo ang luha galing sa mata niya. This beautiful man is crying because of me, and I didn't deserve even a single drop of his tears.

I kissed his tears away. "I'm sorry." Bulong ko sa kanya.

He removed his arms that was covering his face and looked at me. He stared at me for a moment. His eyes showed emotions that I've never seen before. There was sadness, vulnerability, selflessness and to my surprise, still filled with so much love.

"It's okay." He sadly answered while forcing out a smile.

"It's not. I've hurt you. I don't deserve those tears." Sabi ko nang pinahid ko ang mga luha sa mata niya.

"You're worth every pain and suffering, Bella. Mahal na mahal kita." Sabi niya.

He pulled me and positioned us into a spooning position. The two of us cuddled together, feeling the intensity of each other's warmth, like two souls getting closer together. A few moments later, he tightened his hug and clung onto me further, as if his life depended on it.

"Mahal na mahal kita Bella kaya ang sakit-sakit." Sabi niya as he cried again.

I just let him cry on me. "Wag mo naman ako iwan." Pagmamakaawa niya. "Hindi ko kaya ng wala ka eh, mahal ko. Ikaw ang buhay ko, pag iniwan mo ko, hindi ko alam kung makakapagmahal pa ba ako ng ganito."

Maski ako ay naiyak na din. He's a great man. He's very strong and independent pero heto siya ngayon, nagmamakaawa sa taong tulad ko.

"Sorry Liam, pero pangarap na natin pinag-uusapan natin dito. Susuportahan kita sa gusto mo, basta suportahan mo din ako." Sabi ko.

"Hindi magiging madali ang internship ko, Bella. Mawawalan ako ng tulog at puno lang ng aral. Tapos sasabayan pa ng training ko. I need you by my side, to be my strength. If you leave me now, it will be my downfall." Sabi niya.

I closed my eyes. "Nung kailangan mo ko, hindi ako umalis sa tabi mo, pero ngayon, kailangan kita, Bella. Hindi magiging madali buhay ko sa Cebu, pero okay lang yun. Ang hindi ko kaya ay ang mawala ka." Sabi niya.

"Ako rin naman, pero Liam, kung dito ako sasaya and if we have to grow apart, I think we should  do it." I took out the pendant underneath my clothes. Yung sunflower necklace na binigay niya when we got together. "Naalala mo nung binigay mo saken tong necklace na to? You want me to prioritize self-love and healing, ito na yun. Kakayanin natin to."

When he didn't answer, I knew I already convinced him. He smiled pero halatang pinilit niya lang ngumiti kahit nasasaktan siya nang sobra.

I gently kissed him on the lips. He closed his eyes as his lips slowly moved against mine. His kisses were full of love. Maya-maya pa ay pumatong na siya saken at hinalikan ako sa leeg. Napasabunot ako sa buhok niya as he sucked on my sweet spot. I moaned and called out his name as his hands went down to my waist, then underneath my nightgown. His thumb started caressing my waist in a circular motion.

He gently sucked on different parts of my neck down to my collar bone where he left marks. Eventually, his hand slowly lifted my night gown until it reached under my bra. He moved his mouth away from my neck to my tummy and left marks again everywhere. It's the first time that he's leaving marks all over my body.

He flipped me over, so now my back is facing him. This time he started leaving marks on my back. It felt good. It was as if his soft lips were

He kissed me again and it felt so good, as if his soft lips are massaging my back. "Hhhmmm... Liam..." I whispered.

"I love you, Bella. No man's gonna mark your body like I do."

Hindi ko alam kung anong pumasok sa isip niya at nasabi niya yon but I'm too drowned in his kisses to mind it.

Nilingon ko siya at hinalikan sa labi. "My turn." Sabi ko as I licked his earlobe and gently sucked on it.

Pumatong ako sa kanya at hinalikan ko siya sa leeg. He smells so good. It was a mixture of sexiness and masculinity. My kisses went down from his neck, to his chest down to his abs. It was a magical night.

I woke up feeling like I'm floating in cloud nine. I reached out beside me but found out that Liam's no longer beside me. Narinig ko ang pag-off ng shower sa CR. Lumabas si Liam sa CR with only a white towel covering him from his waist down. I blushed when I saw my kiss marks all over his body.

He looks so sexy. "Nagising na pala ang Prinsesa ko." Sabi niya sabay kinuha ang puting silk coat ng night gown ko. "Cover up. Lagot ako kay Tito pag nakita niya mga marka ko sa katawan mo."

Lalo akong namula. "Wala namang nangyari satin kagabi eh, minarkahan mo lang ako." Disappointed kong sinabi as I pouted my lips. He kissed me on the lip sabay sabi ng "What can I say, I'm a man of my word."

I wore my coat on top of my night gown habang si Liam naman pumasok ng CR para magbihis. Nagulat ako nang nakabihis siya ng pang-alis paglabas niya at kumuha ng maleta sa cabinet. "Where are you going?" tanong ko sa kanya.

Liam faced me and breathed deeply. "I've given it some thought. I'll support you and won't stop you from chasing your dreams if that's what you really want, anything for your happiness." He paused for a moment, stared at me lovingly then continued speaking.

"I'm going back to Cebu, my family wants me to go back as soon as possible, para dun na mag-vacation before my internship. Don't worry, Bella, I'll no longer push you to go with me."

He smiled reassuringly, but I know he was trying to be strong for the both of us.

'What?! No!!! Don't leave me!'