Never let you go

Chapter 16

Hunter:

Damn does that girl get under my skin. Not in a bad way like she annoys me but in a way that lets me know I want her. Every day I tell myself I'm not going to text her to come over or that if she does come over I'm just going to be a complete dick and tell her she needs to back off, but then she comes walking in the door and I lose all my resolve as soon as I lay eyes on her.

Once she left on Sunday I started reading Wuthering Heights and it's actually pretty good. It started off a little slow but now I'm pretty into it. When my mom came back and saw me reading I could tell she was shocked. She hasn't seen me read since the accident but before the accident I actually loved reading. I was kind of a nerd.

When Grey told me she goes to Harvard I was tempted to tell her how I was accepted to Georgetown so I could impress her but then I would have to go into detail on why I declined my acceptance. I wasn't ready to do that besides maybe nerdy dudes weren't really her type considering she wasn't dating any of the guys she went to school with.

I could tell Grey was happy yesterday when she came over and saw that I was already almost half way through the book. It was pretty cute the way she got excited when she talked about certain parts with me. She was definitely the hottest nerd I have ever seen. My mom just left to get out of the apartment for a few hours so I texted Grey that she could come over whenever she was ready. I knew she was going to be pleased when she saw that I was about three quarters of the way done with the book now.

About a half hour later Grey comes walking in carrying her school bag which looks a little heavy and I feel bad for a moment that I can't get off my ass and take it from her. I really needed to get out of this bed already. I was feeling stronger but my broken ribs and incisions were still healing and sore.

"Hey" she says smiling as she walks into my room and I'm happy she's in a good mood.

"How was school?" I ask her.

"It was good" she says. "Classes went by reasonably quick today, and I had a quiz in biochem but I'm pretty sure I did well."

"Good" I tell her.

"How was your day?" she asks. "I can see you have gotten some reading done."

"I have" I say as I hold up the book.

"I'm so glad you like it" she tells me smiling that sweet smile of hers that melts my darkened heart.

"It's good" I tell her honestly. "I'll probably finish it today."

"Well when you're done let me know and I can bring over some other books for you."

"Deal" I tell her.

"You look a lot better" she tells me after a couple moments have passed us by. "I'm digging the whole scruffy thing. It suits you."

"You think?" I ask. I've never been one to go more than a few days without shaving except for maybe after the accident. I think there was at least a whole month that went by before I shaved then.

"Yep" she says nodding approvingly.

"Well alright then" I say. "I guess it's a good thing since I can't stand up long enough to actually shave anyway" I add with a laugh and she laughs along with me. God I love that sound.

"Don't worry" she says still laughing. "You'll be strong enough to stand on your own in a few days."

"That's right I guess you should know all about this stuff. Future Dr. Montgomery" I say only slightly joking.

"Let's not get carried away. I'm only in my second year of pre-med. I have a long way to go."

It still amazes me that she wants to be a doctor. What a selfless profession. She wants to save lives for a living. I know she's going to be an amazing doctor one day because not only is she smart but she also has a kind heart. Two things doctors desperately need.

"You're going to be a great doctor" I tell her.

She looks at me and her dark blue eyes are kind and beautiful and innocent. "Thank you Hunter" she tells me like hearing me say that means the world to her.

"Come sit" I tell her since she is still standing near the foot of my bed. She always seems nervous about coming to sit on my bed with me, like I might think she is being too forward. As if any guy would ever complain about having a girl as beautiful as her come sit on his bed with him. She drops her book bag finally and pads along the floor until she reaches my bed and then she gracefully hops on but is still careful not to sit too close to me.

I'm about to turn the TV on so we can watch something and just relax together but she stops me. "Will you read to me?" she asks quietly motioning towards the book in my lap. Her voice is so sweet and innocent and I know in that moment that I could never deny this girl anything. It was crazy the power she has over me. It was also scary as hell.

"Of course" I tell her and I open the book and begin reading.

Almost two hours later I'm a few pages from the end and I don't miss how Grey has gotten progressively closer to me. I don't think she was really even doing it on purpose it seemed more like she did it subconsciously. I didn't mind though. I wanted her closer. When I read the final words I notice a tear slip down Grey's cheek. I reach over before she can say anything and I gently wipe the tear from her face. She closes her eyes when my hand touches her face but it only last for a second before she opens them again and the sad hopeful look in her big blue eyes nearly breaks my heart.

"I'm sorry" she says wiping her cheek with her hand. "The end of the book always gets me."

"It's fine" I tell her. I want to comfort her in some other way but I don't know how. I feel helpless and I hate it because my instincts are screaming at me that I'm supposed to protect her and make her feel safe, but I don't know what to do. It's been a long time since I have wanted to be there for another person and even before the accident I never felt such a strong need to protect someone. It was scary.

Sure I had loved Jess, don't get me wrong. I would always love her. I would always miss her. I had planned on marrying her before she died and was taken from me forever. But there was something about Grey that told me that at some time in her life she had been broken in the same way that I am. She seemed to be healed now but every now and then I could see that unbearable sadness in her eyes that can only be brought on by incredible loss. It made me feel connected to her somehow, like somehow our souls were the same.

Thinking that reminded me of a part in the book, "Whatever our souls are made of, his and mine are the same". I don't know for sure if our souls are the same of course but it felt that way sometimes. Sometimes it felt like she really knows me. I know she has known me for months and that I'm just getting to know her again but even so, just because you know someone for a while doesn't necessarily mean that you know them. But it seemed like she really knew me, like I may have actually let her in past all of the walls of isolation I have put up. It was hard to think about letting her in but then I realized that I think I already have. Or at least I've made a start. I was terrified but something in my gut kept telling me she's worth it.

Grey leaves shortly after I finish reading and she tells me she'll be back tomorrow and this time I'm not an asshole who tells her I'm not her charity case. This time I don't protest or tell her she doesn't have to come see me. Nope, I just say see you tomorrow Grey.