Smile for me || PJM.

thirty-eight | regret

As soon as I felt his lips on mine I brought my arm up and pushed him away by his shoulder.

I don't want him to regret anything later, that's why I did it.

He looked straight into my eyes, before slowly looking down at my arm placed on his shoulder.

He then looked back at me and parted his lips, trying to form any words, but his thoughts were too jumbled up.

In a swift second, he got off the couch and went upstairs, leaving me there frozen on the couch.

Slowly, I brought my finger up to my lips and kept it there.

...How does his lips still feel amazing when they're chapped..?

I snapped out of it and got up, going upstairs.

I stood by his bedroom, letting out a quiet sigh before putting my hand on the handle and twisting it.

But it didn't move.

"Jimin... open the door."

No response.

"Jimin... please..."

"Leave me alone please" his voice sounded weak and sad, almost hurt. I also knew that he was right by the door because of how near the voice sounded.

"You've been alone enough... I'm not leaving you alone again."

There was no response so I asked, "Shall we just not talk about it..? Do you want to just forget about it?"

"...Can we?" he asked quietly. "Of course... but don't worry, I don't hate you for it. I only pushed you away because I didn't want you to regret it later."

Again, it was silent so I asked, "Can you open the door then please?"

It was silent for a few seconds until I heard some shuffling, and the door opened.

He was looking down, almost ashamed.

I sighed and stepped closer, wrapping my arms around him in a secure hug.

He didn't hug me back, I hugged him even tighter but he still didn't hug back.

But I didn't want to pressurise him. So I pulled back, looking straight into his eyes.

"Forget it, seriously. Don't worry about me, I'm the one who's worried about you."

I gave him a small smile then said, "Come on down, I'll go call Tae."

I left the room, the intention was to just give him a little space.

Of course it affected me though. For a second I just wanted to forget about anything and devour the moment, but Jimin wasn't in the right state of mind. I couldn't take advantage of him and not do anything.

-----

What I didn't know, is that Jimin did badly want to hug back.

He almost did, he had brought his arms up but he stopped at the last moment.

Because he knew the truth.

He knew that Y/n was affected in one way or another, but she cared about him more.

Maybe too much... and it beat him up inside. He didn't know anymore if Y/n was okay even if she said she was.

Because for all he could know is that she wasn't okay, but she had put up an act to not add to Jimin's worries.

But those acts made him worry even more.

And Jimin felt like it was all his fault.

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Eeyyy, its been a few days since I've updated :D

After the last chapter my head was so blank for ideas then all of a sudden at half past 12 at midnight the ideas came rushing in so here I am one hour later updating 🙃

I still have ideas for another chapter lol but my eyes hurt and I really need to sleep... so yh dunno when I'll update next.

I'm meant to he studying like crazy for exams coming starting in like 2 weeks time but my period started and I've been through so much pain in the last 2 days 😭 today my English teacher picked on me in class in sixth lesson I was brain dead and did not know the answer... man I hate it when teachers pick on you and the whole class goes silent and everyone's staring at you... ughh I hated it.

Anyways I love rambling on don't I 😂 had to get it out somehow lol, so if anyone's bothering to read this than thank you I guess 🙂

But I need motivation, anyone there? 😭