Trevor's POV
"Are you sure you'll leave?" maarteng tanong ni Margaux.
Tumawa ako. "Mukha pa bang prank 'to?" I asked her.
She shrugged and help me packing my clothes.
"I thought kasi you'll win back Anisse.." she softly said.
Napahinto ako sa pagtitiklop.
"There's no point in winning her back.. She's been okay and happy bakit ko pa siya guguluhin?" I said.
She gazed at me. "Keme ka! I know you guys love each other!"
Humalakhak ako. "Is that enough reason to get us back together?"
Pumeywang siya. "Why not?"
"Basta." sabi ko nalang. Buti nalang hindi na siya nagsalita pa.
Yes.. I know that I still love her.. I'm always. But I don't want to bother her again. I know she's perfectly fine all by herself and by her family. And I don't want to bother her again. Natatakot na akong muling magkamali sa kaniya.. kahit pa alam na niya na I never cheated on her. God knows how I wanted to be with her again but I think this is not the perfect time for that.. We need time.
"Oh tapos na." sabi nito.
Tumawa ako. "Oh, paano na yan? Iiwan na kita kailangan mag hanap ka talaga ng jowa mo." Asar ko.
She rolled her eyes. "Hay nako. I don't need one. Kaya ko mag-isa."
Tumaas ang kilay ko. "Weh? Kaya mo mag grocery mag-isa?"
Hindi sya nakaimik kaya natawa ako.
"But seriously, are you really sure?"
I nodded. "We need time."
"Is the four years not enough?"
Umiling ako. "I don't know. I just feel this is not the right time.."
She shrugged.
I'm going to LA. I had an offer there.. Napag isip-isip ko rin na kailangan ko pa talaga ng maraming kaalaman sa propesyon na pinili ko kaya magandang opurtunidad ito para sakin.
And I guess Anisse will understand me. She will always. I promised to come back when I know and feel like it's the right time..
Hindi na ako mahahatid ni Margaux sa airport kaya ako nalang mag-isa.
"Alis na ako. Mag iingat ka palagi ha? Wag kang mag papagutom." bilin ko sa kaniya.
Tumango naman ito at tinulak pa ako papasok sa sasakyan kaya natawa ako.
"Sige na. Umalis ka na." Sabi nito. Binuksan ko na ang makina ng sasakyan at nag paalam na sa kaniya. Nakita ko namang paalis din siya pero binalewala ko nalang.
By the way, sa shipping line nga pala ni James ako ngayon nag book ng Flight. Wala lang gusto ko lang i-test yung service nila. Haha! Joke! Walang personalan dito no! Gusto ko lang talagang subukan.
Upon driving.. Anisse suddenly came out on my mind.
I'm really happy for her. I'm super proud of her.. because even without me she achieved all her dreams. Kahit nasasaktan siya nagawa niyang lahat yun. Mas lalo ko siyang minahal. Mas lalong naging solid yung pagmamahal ko sa kaniya.
When we broke up four years ago.. I did realize many things. I did realize how lucky I am because I have her. I realize how she mean to me. And when she left? I'm lost.
I decided to watch her from afar. I watched her be the best version of herself.. and no one knows how proud I am for her. I just wished that things are just easy as that.. madali na kami nalang ulit. Na wala nang komplikasyon.. wala nang harang.
She's been the light of my life.. and until now she lights me kahit walang kami. Because I know in my heart she's here. She is always here.
Nang makarating sa airport ay iniwan ko na ang sasakyan ko. May kukuha naman nun. Pumasok ako at nag hintay sa lobby.
Someone sits beside me kaya napatingin ako ron. Naka pilot uniform kaya nagtaka ako. And nung humarap siya nakilala ko na.
"James?"
Tumango siya.
"Angas ah." sabi ko.
Humalakhak ito. "Sure ka nang aalis ka?" tanong nito.
Tumango ako. "Paano siya?"
Napalingon ako na nagtataka sa kaniya.
"I just feel it's not the right time for us again." malumanay kong sabi.
"Magsasayang ka nanaman ng ilang taon?" tanong niya na kinagulat ko.
"Feeling mo lang yan tol." sabi niya at ako nama'y nagtaka.
What does he talking about?
"Alam kong mahal ang binayad mo dito pero pasensya ka na I won't let you leave.." huling sinabi niya bago umalis.
Akmang hahabulin ko na siya nang may tumawag sa akin.
"Trevor Arcega!"
I know that voice. Parang nag slow mo ang paligid ko nang lingunin ko siya.
It's Anisse.. she's with her family and Margaux na lahat ay nakangiti sa akin.
Naglakad siya papalapit sa akin pero ako hindi ko magawang gumalaw o miske mag salita man lang.
"Where do you think you're going?" mataray na tanong nito sa akin.
Napalunok ako at hindi nakapag salita.
"Tatakasan mo ba ako?" tanong niya.
Umiling ako kaya natawa siya.
"Don't leave, please.." she said.
I gazed at her. I love this girl so much. How could I leave her?
"Who says I'll leave?" natatawang tanong ko.
Kumislap ang mata niya at niyakap ako. I heard her family and Margaux cheered us.
"I love you, Trev.. Always.." she whispered.
I kiss her head. And I love you more than you love me.
"I love you more than you imagined." She chukles that's why I hugged her more.
After all the hardships we experienced back then.. today.. I can feel that it is all worth it. I'm right when I says that Anisse will always be worth the wait and pain. She will always be.
One thing I promised myself is... from this day on I will do everything that will make her happy. And I will make her feel everyday how much I love her and how much she deserve all the world can give.
Nasaktan man kaming parehas in the past it doesn't matter as long as we're willing to forgive the past.. forgive ourselves. Na-realize kong kinain ko lang pala talaga ang mga sinabi ko kanina. I can't leave her..
Siguro masasabi ko kapag wala siya sa paningin ko na kaya ko.. but when I saw her? those eyes of hers? the warmth of her hugs? Lahat nababaliktad. Lahat nababago. Fuck, I'm so whipped.
I know this will not be the last time we'll face problems.. but I know that when those problems comes I'm sure we will face that together and much stronger.
