Before He Lied

Tessa Chapter 17

As soon as I see Zach standing in the doorway my heart hurt, the look on his face says so much. I quickly loosen from Hardin grip and run out the door, I catch up with Zach in the hallway and grab his hand.

"Zach..........please just give me a second."

"Tessa please...........just don't." Zach says full of pain.

Zach turns around and I can see tears pouring down his face.

"Please don't cry...............I'm confused........I."

"It doesn't matter, we aren't an official couple. You can kiss whoever you want."

He tries to walk away but I pull his arm.

"No Zach........I like you.......I do........but Hardin.............I don't know what I'm feeling."

He looks me in the eyes and the guilt seeps in.

"I just want you to be happy.............if he makes you happy then you can be with him."

"Zach no............it's complicated."

"No it's not, I like you so much. But if you like Hardin then you should be with him, but he's just using you. Tessa Hardin isn't a good person, he can't give you what you want. He just wants to sleep with you, you have to trust me."

"Zach I....................I know he's difficult but I.................."

"Hardin has taken everything away from me, I had a girlfriend and he slept with her. Her name was Kelly, when he was done he left her. Tessa I don't want that to happen to you, if I can't make you happy then that's fine but please don't trust Hardin. I care too much about you to let him ruin you."

Of course Hardin slept with his girlfriend, this is such a mess.

"Zach I wished I liked you more, I wish I had these feelings for you but I don't. You are so charming and handsome and such a gentleman and you're gonna make some girl so happy one day. But I.................I love him.........I love Hardin."

It feels so good to let it out, holding feelings inside is awful. Zach looks at me before he lets go of my hand.

"Just be careful, Hardin is incapable of anything real."

"Zach.........please."

He walks down the stairs and leaves the building, I wish that I didn't love Hardin. It would be so much easier if I loved Zach, Zach actually wants me. My love for Hardin is wasting space inside me, he could never love me. It isn't fair to Zach to stay with him, I have to be honest with myself. I have to have hope, I have hope that Hardin will find space in his hatred to love me. And I won't stop fighting for him, for us. I slowly walk back into the room and see Hardin sitting on my bed, when I walk into the room his eyes go to mine and he stands up and walks towards me. I close and lock the door before I turn around, I reach down and take his hands in mine.

"I just told Zach that it wasn't gonna work because I have feelings for you............I just left him for you..........because I want you...........please Hardin..............you have to give me something."

I look up at him with pleading eyes, he sighs and squeezes my hands.

"I'm not sure what I can give you................but I want to try.....................I don't do relationships...............until now........I can't promise that I'll be perfect but I will try to make this work." He says softly.

And suddenly my heart bursts.

"I'm not perfect either, but perfect is boring." She says sweetly.

"Hardin........if we are gonna do this we have to do it right...........usually in relationships we don't sleep with other people.........or kiss other people.............or let other people sits on our lap.........or spit drinks in your mouth......or."

He silences me by pressing his lips into mine, he slowly pulls away and looks at me.

"Don't worry, no more Sam. I'm yours Tessa, I promise."

I wrap my arms around his neck and he pulls me into a tight hug, his hands go to my waist and the fire within grows. I gently run my fingers through his brown locks, he places a soft kiss on my neck before he gently pulls away.

"What's wrong?" I ask him.

"Nothing........it's just awkward."

"Oh." She says with sadness.

"No no not you..............just this...........like what do we do now?" He says with a nervous laugh.

"I don't know." She giggles.

I walk over to my purse and grab my phone, it's only 1 pm. I was supposed to meet Zach in the library but I guess that's out of the picture. To be honest I don't know what to do, we just officially got together and I'm not sure what to do.

"Well I have homework to do so I'm probably just gonna do that, do you have plans?" I ask quietly.

"I have to go do something...........I'll be back soon." He says nervously.

"Ok."

He grabs his keys and leaves the room, I wonder where he's going? I had hoped that he would stay with me but I can't suffocate him, he just agreed to be in a relationship with me. I still can't believe it, I still can't believe I told Zach that I loved Hardin. I would never tell Hardin that I love him to his face but I hope he knows how I feel. He could never love me and I know that this relationship will probably end in a heartbreak but I don't care, I have never felt this way for anyone and I'm choosing to trust Hardin with my heart. No one could break it like Nick did, I trust Hardin and if he really means what he says then I think that we could have something special together.

......

I lay out my books on my bed and start doing my English homework, I have to take notes from the my textbook. It's hard to study when all I'm thinking about is him.

.......

After two hours of mostly thinking about Hardin and wondering where he is, I got most of my work done but I'm super tired. I decided to shower since it's getting late and I need to think. I think best in the shower, I strip my clothes and step into the shower. The warm water drips down my face, I miss Hardin. I reach for my shampoo, why is the bottle so light. I have used this like twice, I used the rest of the shampoo and throw the bottle away. Once I'm done in the shower I wrap in my towel and walk into the room, I open my drawers to look for something to wear to sleep. I really need to do laundry, and now that Zach and I are.......... "done" I can't use his washing machine. This is just great. I take a deep breath, I have nothing to wear. I look over at Hardin's dresser, he was fine with me wearing  his clothes last time. I really don't have anything to where. I slowly walk over to his drawer and open it, I pull out one of his shirts. I walk over to my side of the room and open my top drawer, I pull out some sweatpants. I look at my white matching set, should I? No............I cave and grab the bra and matching underwear. I walk into the bathroom and put them on, wow............I look..........hot. I quickly slip on his shirt and my sweatpants before I leave the bathroom and climb back onto my bed. I put on socks and headphones, I start blasting music while I continue to finish my homework.