The Perfect Storm 2

Chapter 196

"Where were you last night?" Stephanie asks as soon as I open the door to our dorm room. She's sitting on her side of the bed, holding a book in her hands while looking up at me. 

Her fingers tuck lightly at her blue ripped shorts and she gives me a smile, waiting for my answer to spit out of my mouth.

"I was with Milles." I press my lips together, I don't know why it should be a big deal, it's not, but somehow being asked about it makes me feel so guilty but I know that's only because of how I felt about him in the past. 

Before, Miles was so untouchable and someone I could never have dreamt to be with and now, we're together and it's normal and it feels good.

"I'm not even going to ask." Stephanie giggles and I roll my eyes, still wondering why she's asking me and as if she's reading my mind she answers, "I'm only asking because Jacob was looking for you, he said it was urgent or something and apparently he called you a few times."

"Jacob?" I ask even though I heard her loud and clear. Why would Jacob look for me?

"Yeah." Stephanie looks at me with a small smile before she stands up, she's slightly taller than me but I've never really noticed until now. Her blonde hair has gotten slightly longer and it suits her.

"Girls night tonight?" Stephanie asks and I nod at her.

"I'd love to," I say and my mind jumps straight to when Chrissy and I had a girls night, I remember thinking about her and Miles and I knew that they were together and in which ways and it bothered me, I didn't want to admit it to myself but it did; It bothered me. 

After the way he looked at me, knowing that he liked Chrissy, hurt as nothing had ever hurt before.

"Uh, yeah, I . . . I'd love to," I say only to realize that I just replied to her. She gives me a side smile that she always makes where she kind of squints her one eye slightly it reminds me of Elijah in a weird way.

"You said that already . . . are you okay, Madison?" Stephanie asks turning very slowly from giggly to serious.

"Yeah, I'm fine." I give her a small smile that she knows is genuine.

"Well, let's go then." She smiles and I nod, even though I have no idea what today has installed.

I CAN'T RECALL THE number of times I've been at the mall so far but I know it's not many.

"Madison." Stephanie turns to face me after I've been following her to a store I don't recognize. She takes a deep breath, her eyes looking into mine as if trying to hold the gaze so that I won't look away or be hurt by her words.

"I'm saying this as a friend . . ." she plays a small smile on her lips but I can't tell what it really means.

"I know you already have Miles, but he's a big boy and he used to go to these, um, strip—"

"Crystals." I finish without thinking; like a reflex to the words mentioning Miles's past, the past that broke us up for a hurtful while.

"How did you—" She begins quietly but then completely stops herself.

"Whatever." She adds and then finishes, "My point is, that I couldn't help but notice the bralettes you're wearing, they're cute but, Madison, maybe you should try lingerie, we both should, just to spice things up with our boys in the bedroom." Stephanie raises a brow. I've never tried on lingerie, and I've barely seen it before.

"I'm sorry, maybe I shouldn't have—"

"You're right." My mouth spills out before I can have any say in it. I don't know how I feel about her noticing that all I wear are bralettes but she is right, no matter how I take the words in now, bad or good, she is right. I need something different, something for Miles. He is used to girls being dressed up in all kinds of ways for him and even though what I'm offering is enough for him since he hasn't mentioned anything unless he's too scared to say something? Oh god.

"Let's go." Stephanie squeals and I try to squeeze a small smile. I can tell she feels bad and is only trying to ignore her words from minutes ago but I don't want him to feel bad. I want to do this, I really do. We sep inside the big, very big shop. Black and pink seem to be the main colors everywhere I look.

"Do you think Elijah would like pink? Hm, I don't know, maybe not." She says more to herself than to me and I'm thankful I don't have to answer the questions that come out of her mouth, both clear and unclear, audible and inaudible. 

I already feel uncomfortable with all of this, I don't want to know what Stephanie is going to pick out or what it looks like, or how Elijah will like it, or two of them being together like that.

"I, um, I'm going over there," I tell her with the best kind of smile I can manage.

"Oh, of course, let me know what you pick out." She says with a smile of he own as she checks the sizes for something pink that's too complicated for me to understand. 

I take a deep breath before letting my feet take me over to a completely new section. 

I take a look around, hoping no one is looking at my butt sure enough, as people walk past they glance at me too, making me feel even more uncomfortable to be here and when I say guys enter the store with their girlfriends I almost want to tell them to go outside and wait there, this is private, it's a place for girls not for guys to see what their girlfriends are picking out and what all the other girls here are going to look like in the thing they have in their hands. 

I turn back around to something I'm unfamiliar with, but at least now everyone is only glancing at my back. The only reason I'm not leaving the store is because of the image in my mind of Miles when he sees me wearing something like this. 

My fingers touch the delicate lace and even though I'm not sure what I'm holding in my hands exactly, it looks pretty for some reason, it's complicated but pretty. I grab the hanger that is attached to the clothing before taking a quick breath and trying to avoid Stephanie as I make my way to the dressing rooms.