A Heart Break In Time

What's New With Composting?

I looked to the ground to see Tony's dead body and Pepper lifted her head, eyes bloodshot. "He's dead because of you."

"Pep... no, don't say that." I took a step forward and Peter stood in front of her, blocking me. "Pete?" Peter didn't respond to me, just stared into my face with an expression I've never seen on him before.

"Talia," Steve stood from behind them. "Go."

I started walking backwards, I watched as everyone I loved no longer loved me, eyes staring into me as if I've done the most unforgivable thing. But I had, hadn't I? It should've been me. I turned and ran. Not stopping for what seemed like hours. I turned around and saw Bucky carrying Tony's body off the war zone. His eyes lifeless as he spoke. "It should've been you." I closed my eyes hoping to wake up. When I opened them, Bucky was right in front of me. He lifted his metal arm and it went to my throat.

"Bucky," I choked out. "Bucky, stop. Please."

His eyes stared into mine, as if they were trying to look past me. "Who the hell is Bucky?" His grip tightened and I woke with a jump.

"Talia?" Bucky was there in front of me. I jumped back, further into my headboard as I looked around terrified. "Talia, it was a nightmare. You're safe." He held his hand out to me and I saw the black vibranium reflect from the light of my tv, not the silver metal from the dream. I threw my arms around him and he held me tight. "It's okay. I'm here. Don't cry." I didn't even realized I was crying. "I got you."

"I can't- I'm not- no." Every word I tried to stutter out made me want to cry more so I stopped trying, and just let Bucky hold me.

"Tony?" Bucky asked softly, lightly rubbing my head. I didn't try to speak again, just nodded. "Yeah. Me too." The image of him holding Tony's body, carrying him lingered in my mind. I know how my brain got that image. The group of us standing around Tony's body, most of us done crying when we realized. Someone had to bring him home. As if he knew what I was thinking, Steve went to pick him up, but Bucky shook his head and picked up Tony. He carried him away, without looking back.

"Buck? Why did you carry him?" I finally forced coherent words out of my mouth.

He didn't answer right away. When he did, it was quiet. "I didn't want Steve to have to carry his friend. They weren't on speaking terms because of me. And I never got to apologize to him. I owed it to him. I'll forever owe him."

A while passed and I finally felt myself calm down. I pulled away from Bucky to look at his face. "Can you stay with me? Please?" Bucky nodded but pulled away. I tightened my grip on him and he chuckled. "Just closing the door, doll." I let him get up and I stood by the bed, waiting. As he closed the door I heard some whispering but couldn't make out what it was or who it was. That part of my room was pitch back, I couldn't even see Bucky as he came back until the light from my TV was on him. "I got you, doll." He wrapped his arms around me and I let him pick me up. Bucky sat on my bed and leaned back against the headboard. Once he leaned back I moved to curl up against him but Bucky tightened his grip. "Wrong side, doll." I lifted my head in confusion so Bucky lifted my shirt to rub his left arm along my back. I shivered.

"Ah, the cold side." I nodded and moved over top of him to get to the other side.

Bucky chuckled. "Right, the cold side." I rested my head on his chest and realized he was shirtless. Again. Did he ever sleep fully dressed? And at that moment I realized how little I was wearing too. I decided to just go with a big t shirt and underwear again tonight. Bucky didn't seem to notice, or care. He rubbed his arm along mine in soft light circles, I focused on that until I fell asleep.

When I woke up, my legs were tangled in his. Bucky's arms were both wrapped around me as I drooled on his chest. I sat up, noticing the drool and was immediately embarrassed. "Shit." I whispered as I wiped it off of my face and him.

I heard Bucky chuckle. "It's fine, doll. Just a little spit."

"Oh. You're awake." I looked at him, face still looking sleepy, like he hadn't been fully awake, just dozing in and out. Bucky just hummed in response as he tightened his arms around me, pulling me back down. I laid my head next to his as he turned on his side to look at me. "Don't look at me like that, Buck."

"Like what?"

"Like you want to kiss me."

Bucky's face broke out into a smirk. "I do wanna kiss you, doll."

I sat up. "Buck, I-"

"I didn't, though, did I?" He sat up next to me. "I just said I want to. But I won't. Unless you want me to." Bucky raised his eyebrow and looked at me as he said the last statement, waiting for me to agree.

"It's not that simple and you know it."

"You like Kai, don't you?"

The sudden question startled me. I hadn't even been thinking of Kai, and how would he even know that? "What?"

Bucky moved so that he was facing away from me, legs off the bed. "It's obvious. You look at him... Well, like you look at me. Guess you just love the broken boys, huh?" He joked but I could hear the hurt in his voice.

"You're not broken, Bucky." I moved and kneeled behind him, wrapped my arms around him. "You're not broken." I repeated. His arms slid along mine in front of him. I leaned my head into the crook of his neck, pressing my lips against his skin but not kissing him.

"Talia." Bucky sighed.

I smiled against him. "Yes, Bucky?"

He groaned at my breath against him. "You're killing me."

"You're the one coming in my room shirtless in the middle of the night."

Bucky chuckled. "Next time I hear you screaming, I'll make sure to grab a shirt."

I smiled as I kissed his shoulder. "No, I think I can live with this."

Bucky groaned again and leaned back against me.  "Tease."

I kissed his shoulder again. "Coffee?"

"Sure." He leaned away from me and I pulled my arms back. I grabbed a pair of sweats and walked out of my room, Bucky following. When I walked past the kitchen I saw a sleeping blonde on the couch. I put my finger over my lips telling Bucky to be quiet, and pointed at Steve sleeping. Bucky tilted his head confused and shrugged. We walked to the kitchen quietly. Once there, he started the coffee while I sat up on the counter. When the pot was brewing he walked over to me, leaning between my legs as he wrapped his arms around my waist, laying his head on my chest.

"Still sleepy?" I asked as I ran my fingers through his hair.

"Mmf." Bucky replied against my chest and I giggled, wrapping my arms around him. He suddenly pulled back and before I could question it, someone spoke from the doorway.

"Oh, good. Coffee." Kai gave a smile that seemed forced as he sat on the stool behind me.

Bucky nodded. "Should be done soon."

"Great. What are we talking about?" Kai smiled.