What I Really Want To Say

I'd Love You If You Had No Thumbs.

I was awake, but my eyes weren't open. I could hear multiple people surrounding me in the room, and one was holding my hand. I didn't have to be a mind reader to know that it was Travis. 

Slowly, i opened up my eyes to the room. It was really bright and i suddenly shut them while shaking a little. My head started to throb. 

"Megan?" The position my hand was being held in moved, and that's when i knew Travis was the one holding it.

I turned my head a little towards him, and once again slowly opened my eyes to see his face. His hair was up in a gray beanie, and he was smiling. 

"Hey, baby." I went to go lean up and kiss him but he lightly pushed me back down. "No, no, don't get up. You literally just had brain surgery, don't over do it."

He leaned down to kiss me, and that must have been when everyone figured out i was awake. 

"I'll go get a nurse." Thomas left the room, which left Travis, Alex, and Danny.

"How do you feel?" Travis pushed some of my hair away.

"Um, a little dizzy. A little like i just got cut open. Yeah." 

Travis laughed. "Baby, you just did get cut open."

After the nurse came in and checked everything, Alex and Danny left after hugging me and saying goodbye. Thomas was passed out in the corner and Travis was still at my bedside.

"It amazes me how strong you are sometimes."

"I could say the same for you." I smiled.

"Go to sleep baby. I'll be right here when you wake up in the morning."

Once again, he was there. Today, the nurses helped me get up from my bed for the first time in almost a full day. I got to walk half way to the cafeteria and Travis got to wheel me in the wheelchair the rest of the walk. 

I instantly felt nostalgia. Last time i was in the cafeteria, Travis was the one in the wheelchair, and i was the one wheeling him. Now it's the other way around.

I had an itch on my head, and slowly raised my hand to lightly rub at the area. Holy shit. I was basically bald.

"Travis. How much hair did they shave?"

I saw his worried face. "Uh, not that much.."

"Don't lie to me, Travis. I can feel how much is gone."

He sighed. "Okay, Megan. Want me to like trace the part of your head where the hair is gone?"

"Yes." I felt him trace around my scalp. I was right, about fourty precent of my hair was gone. The hair i spent almost three years getting to the exact length i wanted it to be. "Why didn't they just shave all of my fucking head?"

"Oh, Megs." Travis sat on his knees in front of me in the wheelchair. "Listen, baby. I'll love you no matter what. If you have one eye, if you had no thumbs, or even if you have no hair."

"Damn. You'd love me if i had no thumbs?" We both laughed and i placed my hands around his neck and hugged him. "I love you so much. Thank you, Trav." We quickly kissed and he rolled me over to a table. Not many people were there. Travis went and got me lunch, which looked horrible, and sat down next to me. He placed his arm around the back of me while i ate.

Travis whispered into my ear, "Those two were here the last time we were." He looked over at the little girl and what looked like the older sister sitting at a table. The little girl had grown her hair out a little more, and the older sister was smiling. This was great, compared to the last time when she was frowning the entire time.