Guardian Angel \\ l.h.\\ Luke Hemmings

Chapter Thirty Seven: Applogy

IM BACK TELL A FRIEND!
I learned I got to accept what happens and if Zayn and the boys can, then so can I.
Also I'm going to do a question every chapter because I feel I want to get to know you guys (:
So, what's your favorite 5sos song(s)?
Mine is Long Way Home, Never Be, and Beside You

After school, Ivy offered that we could go hang out at her place. But unfortunately I had to decline because I still had tutoring with Lea.

I didn't want to face her not after our last blow out.

She revealed so much, so much raw wounds that were yet to be healed. She might have the cause of my torment in school but I was the cause her's everyday.

And even though she did wrong, she didn't mean it. It was just selfish human nature to want to harm what hurts you most. I learned from experience.

I knew Lea was going to be there when I got home, waiting for me. She wasn't the type to disappoint especially if it displeased others. She's probably already at the kitchen table waiting for me with her hair in a perfectly tight bun and her nails in the same pale pink.

I wonder what it was like for her to deal with what she had to. Everyone deals with situations differently, but I just couldn't image such a perfect person hiding such dark secrets.

I don't even know how to feel about being the person to cause her such pain. Of course, there were times were a detested her. I mean to me, she and Silvia were trying to replace my mother. They were all trying to force me into a family that I didn't belong in.
Once again, it was my flaw of being temperamental and emotional that blocked them out.

I never gave them a chance. And because of that, they turned into the beings I unfairly thought they were.

"Everything will be okay." Luke broke my thoughts. One of his hands was on the wheel, the other was on my thigh.

I wasn't surprised he was reading my thoughts; I had been silent throughout the car ride. Even when he was asking questions about my new friend, I just didn't want to speak. I'm nervous, actually terrified of the confrontation to come.

All these possibilities of what's going to happen rush through my worried mind. And the worst one don't enter unnoticed.

"Tell me what's on your mind sweetheart, it's better to then keeping it all in." He advised, his eyes switching from the road to me and back to the road.

With a deep breathe, I tell him what's racing through my brain. Although r he probably did know what I was thinking, he wanted to hear my actual voice. He wanted me to let go of what I was blocking in and to just let it all out. Let every single worry and frustration out.

When the car arrived in the drive way, I was already wiping a few tears away. But my emotions were at ease, at least better then the jumbled mess before, and I was ready to face Lea.

Luke held my hand all the way up to the door step. He kissed my temple before I opened the door, "Good luck baby. I'll be there the second you need me."

He disappeared afterwards and I was left on my own. Those feelings of confidence were dimming down as I realized the screams and hardship that was only bound to erupt.

I sighed, numbly opening the door.

There she was. Lea, like I had foreshadowed, was at the table. She looked up from her homework pile.

But instead of the cold glare I thought would happen; I was given a small smile. She looked tired.

Never had i once seen Lea look like a reflection of me. She seemed worn out like a battle, she was fighting was being lost.

"Hey Cayden." She greeted, with a soft edge.

"H-hi Lea." I stuttered, unsure of how to react. I didn't want to be the one to start the war.

I set my bag on the floor and scooted down on the chair across from her. Piles beyond piles of papers were scattered along with a half filled cup of tea that had to be cold by now.

"How are you?" Lea sincerely asked; she even stopped her work to full look at me.

"I'm-I'm doing okay. I think." I answered her. She took a sip from her tea, not bothered by the temperature.

She looked at me, setting down her china cup and for the first time in my life I heard her stumble her words.

"I kn-know I have been the greate-greatest step sister. I wouldn't blame you if you hated me honestly. But I know what happened last night. You-your friend's girlfriend told me what happened at the party." Lea gulped, "An- and I just want you to know tha-that I'm here for you. I really am, I mean I researched on how to deal with this and there are support groups and-"

"Lea, you didn't have to do this." I found myself speaking even though I was at a lost for words.

"But I did. I know our last blow out wasn't pretty but- but I jus- I just-" she choked out, "I just want you to know that I'm here for you and I'm really sorry for everything. I'm really sorry that I wasn't a good sister and I'm really sorry about the stupid rumors I made. I'm sorry, I'm just really really sorry." She put her head in her hands, afraid of my reaction.

I didn't know to react. Never in my wildest dreams, would I ever imagine that Lea would be apologizing. I always thought that if the ones I didn't like would crawl back to me, I would never forgive them for the hole in my heart they caused.

But this situation was different, I wanted to forgive Lea. Because forgiving her meant I forgave myself in the smallest way. And that's all I wanted to do was finally be able to forgive myself.

"Lea," I spoke up, "I forgive you. I just want you to know that I'm sorry too. I'm sorry for blocking you out. I was just so angry that my family was broken and I took it out on you, I'm sorry."

Lea stared at me with surprise, "I accept your apology. But I understand, when my mother told me about your dad I was a little bit hurt that she was trying to replace my dad. Yeah, he was an alcoholic but he still was my dad and even though he did stupid things, all the good times we had made up for that."

I nodded thinking of my actual mother. Silence fell between the cracks of our mending relationship. We just started but it was better then where we were from.

It would take time but right now time was what I had and could give.

"I need to-I need to tell you something." Lea blurted causing me to look up.

She started talking, "I heard it was Rylan and honestly, I was going to go to the school authorities. But then the office, I heard he had transferred schools already."

The breath was knocked out of me. Rylan knew. Rylan knew That he was going to change schools beforehand. His plan was bullet proof, he would just do the deed and never have to face me again.

Without conscious warning, I wept. I wept because I never knew something like this could happen to me. I wept knowing that more walls were built inside of me. I wept that I wanted to believe in everyone because I needed something, I needed someone.

"Hey," I felt Lea's thin arms wrap around me, "Hey, I'm here. You won't go through this alone Cayden. I'm here, Calum is here and I saw you and Luke today. Cayden, you are so very lucky to have him in you're life. I see the way you two are, he would jump the ends of the Earth to make you happy."

She was right, she was absolutely right. And after a few more shed tears and reassurances. I raced to my room.

Luke was on my bed and before he could ask any questions, I jumped into his arms. He caught me like he always does.

"I love you." I murmured in his chest.