Let's All Make Believe - Oasis

Chapter 79

Liam had a few days before he had to go to America but he decided to turn up on my doorstep with a suitcase the day after they were done in Germany. I didn’t know what he thought he was doing there, with a case rather than back at his own home dealing with his unfolding divorce... Maybe he was just here to see his son. It was on his birthday after all but that seemed coincidental after everything that happened in Paris.
  “You know you can't stay here?”
  “Why not? I'm a free man. We’re getting divorced just like you wanted.”
  “Cos I'm not! I'm happy with Lydia.”
After Paris that wasn’t so true. I was still working hard to get back into her good books and him being there was the last thing I needed if I was ever going to get there. We were still engaged just about, seeing Liam impose himself was sure to remind her to break it off.
  “I want us to be a proper fucking family, Stacy.” he announced as though he could argue his way into it. “What's she got to offer?”
  “A stable relationship, two years of it.” I pointed out. “You had your chance. I told you I wasn't waiting around.”
  “Still was shagging me though. Does she know that?”
  “I'm not gonna hurt her Liam. I love her and I want to be with her. You getting divorced makes no difference.” I argued, denying him the best I could. “You’re not staying here.”
  “Where am I supposed to fucking go? I just threw my marriage for you.”
     I shrugged. “Your place? Your Mam’s? Your brothers’? Anywhere but here.”
  “Please. This is my place too”
  “We’ve got no room for you.”
Of course there was plenty of physical space, he had his own guest room but there was no room emotionally. I promised I'd keep my distance, Lydia could never agree to him staying.
     Nathan came running in. “Daddy!”
  “Hey!” Liam picked him up. “Have ya missed me?”
  “Yeah. You missed me?”
  “Course I have. Thought about you everyday, waiting to come back to you.”
     I rolled my eyes, frustrated he was interrupting us, frustrated Liam was going to try to use Nathan to guilt me into letting him stay. I couldn't ever deny letting Nathan be with his dad, he knew that.
  “Don’t go ever.”
  “No, I’m not going anywhere for a bit.” he promised.
  “Nathan, go play with your brother. Daddy’ll come play in a minute.”
     He went off and Liam went straight back to trying to argue me into letting him stay. “There’s room, there’s my room.”
     We’d had the house for so long that I’d forgotten it was his and I had absolutely no right to stop him from staying. I couldn’t handle living with him though. I couldn’t think of a good enough lie. “The kids took it over with their toys.”
  “I’ll kip on the settee for fuck’s sake.” he bargined although we both knew there was no need for that. “Anything.”
  “I’ll ask Lydia if you can stay.” I conceded. “For now. She's not going to say yes.”
     We went to play with the kids. Liam immediately settled in. I couldn't shake the anxiety for explaining his arrival to Lydia. I couldn’t pull him away from his son, could I?
  “Liam!” She said with shock and confusion, looking to me for an explanation for the unwanted guest.
     I put down the toy I had and took her to another room. “How was your day?”
  “Is that his suitcase?” She looked at it, not going along with my small talk.
  “He was wondering if he could stay here… just a few nights. He'll be back on the road after that.”
     She crossed her arms. “There's no room.”
  “I said that but he's not seen Nathan in a while and Nathan doesn't want him to go.”
  “Why are ya even asking me?”
  “Cos it's your home too.” I pointed out that she absolutely had a say in this. “Please don't be mad, I don't want him here. If it wasn't for Nathan…”
  “I know.”
“I'll stay away from him, this is my chance to prove myself.”
She very reluctantly agreed to let him stay just as I had, he insisted we wouldn’t even notice he was there. We all knew that couldn't be true.
…
Once Lydia was asleep I laid thinking I hadn't gotten to talk to Liam much. He tried to focus on the kids and keep out of our way. We didn't get a chance to set boundaries. We probably needed that but neither of us liked rules.
I got out of bed to find him. He was sat in the living room flicking through the TV channels so I sat with him.
“You can go to bed y'know. You don't have to stay on the sofa.”
“I wanted to watch something before I went.”
“Are you okay? It's okay if you're not, divorce is a lot…”
“What would you know about divorce? Your parents are still together, everyone you know are still together except me and my marriage.”
“I know I didn't mean to hurt you with it.”
“You didn't. I'm fine. I'm completely fine with my marriage ending.” He tried to sound like he couldn't care less.
“You're not here to break up me and Lydia, are you?” I asked. “Get revenge?”
“No! You didn't… You said it but we broke it up together.” He emphasized the we. “I won't interfere in your relationship.”
It was good to hear him taking responsibility for his actions but I didn't believe he'd leave my relationship alone now he was single again. “Why did you come here then? You know it's not gonna be easy on any of us."
“To be with my family. Do you think I'm miserable so I have to make you miserable back?”
“No. But if I was single, we'd be single together.”
“If you want that you can talk to Lydia but I'm not interfering.”
“You said.”
“And you don't believe me.”
“Well being here even if you don't say a word, is interfering. Just look how New Year went down.”
“That wasn't me. I wasn't waiting on her to hit on me. I could understand it if it was you, but not her. I was minding my own business. I just wanted to keep my head down, like I do now.”
“Are you gonna stay here permanently? It is your house.”
“I don't stay anywhere five minutes. I'm a rock and roll star.”
“When you're not on tour, you'll come back here?”
“Only if I'm welcome.”
“You couldn't be more welcome. Not because of Nathan's wishes. Mine… Maybe I should break up with Lydia now, sooner rather than later. Everyone's waiting for it.”
“You need to go to bed with your missus and stop thinking about anyone else. The only people who care about your relationship are you, her, the kids and me.”
“And Delfie.” I added.
“If you wanted to end it you'd have done it after Paris, not stayed engaged to her.” He held my
hand looking at the engagement ring.
“Well I don't know if we are still engaged. We lasted a day. That's a record, right?”
“She must be coming around to me and you…”
“Don't be stupid!”
“You could find someone else who wouldn't mind. I know you don't wanna be alone while I'm away.”
“I don't want someone I can walk all over for you.”
“If they knew from the start… Noel knew…”
“No!” I interrupted. “Noel… He suspected. He didn't know. He didn't agree. Even if he did, I don't want to be with anyone like him again. I want you.”
“And I want you but you need more than just me. You could have all the women in Liverpool and Manchester and even fucking London until you found someone…”
“Who could get along with you? Someone who will want to get with you when you want it? The three of us? I don't want someone like that from the north, the south, Ireland, Scotland or America!”
“I want you to be happy.”
“I am happy. I don't need you to try to make me happy.”
We sat quietly watching the telly or at least pretending to have our attention on the telly because we didn't have much to say. We just needed each other's company.
“You need to get off to bed before you fall asleep with me.” Liam pointed out when I was getting a little too relaxed with him.
“Good night. You go to bed too.” I told him before I snuck off to bed. I cuddled up to Lydia like I'd never left her side and even though Liam had given me a lot to think about I fell asleep quickly.
Those few days became indefinite without us realising. I didn’t know how that had happened when he was and always had been such an imposing person. Obviously I knew he was there, I just didn’t mind it like I thought I would. I didn’t know how Lydia felt, she was just getting on with it.
When the time came Liam went off to America for a month long tour of the states, Canada and Mexico. He surprisingly went without a fuss. He must’ve wanted to be half the world away from his soon to be ex wife and the trouble she was causing him. We didn’t know what he was going to do when he returned home. We didn't talk about it.
…
When Liam was gone I started having this dream. I was confused that I was having recurring dreams about him and a vampire.
Every time I would be approached by a vampire, she seduced me until I was willing to let her bite me which would certainly kill me. She was so sexy there was no way I could resist.
The moment she tries to sink her teeth into me Liam is there with a stake saving me. Or he would try to.
“No! Liam stop!” I would tell, holting him just in time.
“She's going to kill you. Let me stop her.”
“It has to be this way. Leave it.”
“No!”
“Let it happen. You can't be here every time. You can't have me all to yourself.”
The vampire grew bored of waiting and sunk her teeth into me, forcing me to wake up from the dream. I hadn't been watching horror films or even Buffy the Vampire Slayer so I didn't know why I was getting horror themed dreams. I decided it had to mean I thought I didn't want him thinking he needed to save me, especially not from something I wanted. I thought it meant he needed to back off because I chose Lydia, not him.
I didn't tell anyone about the dreams. I thought they'd think my dreams were trying to tell me I shouldn't be with Lydia or any woman or worse think it was something to do with my schizophrenia and worry about me.
… 
I went to Manchester to see Bethanie. She was family now so she was the sister I needed. It was easy to talk to her because she didn't know the half of it so she had a fresh perspective.
“How's Paul?” I asked.
“He's fine, we're going good.”
“I'm glad to hear it. I'm glad one of us gets to have a nice uncomplicated relationship.”
“Liam's moved in, hasn't he?”
“Yeah.” I sighed. “In between the touring.”
“You don't want him there?”
“The kids do, Lydia doesn't. I don't know what I want.”
“How can you not know whether you want him living with you or not?”
“I love him, I really, properly love him but I don't want to be with him. I want to be with Lydia and have a normal relationship with her. He wants me to convince her to let me have a relationship with her and him or find someone who will.”
“Why? Surely he should just want you for himself, especially if you love him that much.”
“When we were in a relationship I broke up with him, cruelly broke up with him to be with Noel. I was horrible to him. Ever since we've both been with someone else. He thinks I need someone when he's not there and if they're a woman, it's fine.”
“And if it was a man? He saw you with Noel all that time.”
“He wants to be the only man in my life, I want him to be the only person in my life if we're going to be together. I wasn't into polyamoury. I was into cheating.”
“You're not into cheating anymore?”
“I'm trying not to be, I'm engaged, I think I'm engaged but now he's moved into our house!”
“How do you not know if you're engaged or not?”
“Lydia proposed but I fucked up basically admitting I haven't been so good at the not cheating when I ran my mouth to Patsy. She tried to break up but I managed to talk her round and we've avoided talking about it since.”
“You need to talk to her. If you know where you stand, maybe you won't want to cheat.” she suggested.
“It's inevitable. Everyone expects it of us, even Lydia.”
“So let her go and be with him.”
“I don't want to though, we're not that great but I don't want it to end until it has to because I ruin it.”
“Why not leave on good terms? Why does it have to be you who ruins it? Lydia…”
“Lydia's not gonna cheat. She won't be the one in the wrong.”
“She could decide to break up because it's the right thing for all of you. No one has to be at fault.”
“You're too much of a lawyer!”
“I don't have kids and I haven't been in a love triangle or a poly relationship but it can't be that complicated. Make a decision and be clear with everyone.”
“Yeah I know. I've been trying to do that for years. Every time I think I made a decision something changes.”
“Liam comes back around?”
We laughed but it was something like that. “If everyone could just stay still, maybe I could make up my mind.”
“If Liam and Lydia were in opposite places who would you go to?”
“You and Paul are so solid, I need to learn from you.” I avoided the question.
“No, you need to stop listening to everyone else. You need more single friends, show you single's okay too.”
“I know it's okay to be single, I just don't want to be. I know I should have a break and do all this with a fresh mind but I can't.” I decided to change the subject quickly. “Do you think you'll move you and Paul to London?”
“No, I'm okay with traveling when I need to. We're happy here. We're planning on renovating the garden and decorating.”
“If you need any help, I can get stuck in.” I offered. “I don't mind gardening or anything.”
“Okay, we will if you can spare some time when the kids are busy.”
“Maybe I should be inviting you to help me keep the kids busy over the summer.”
She agreed, especially since she needed to get to know her nephews before she married into the family. I wondered how much she knew Lennon and Anaïs.
…
I decided to make dinner for me and Lydia so we could sit down and talk. We really needed to talk. We didn't get much chance with the boys, the dog and now Liam moving in. I asked Jamie to look after the boys and Delfie for a bit so we weren't interrupted.
“What's all this for?” she asked when she saw the table laid out for us.
“I just wanted to make time for my fiancé.”
“About that…”
“Let me get the food.” I didn't let her finish. I couldn't stop her from talking forever, I just wanted a chance for us to talk calmly so we could stay together.
“Can we talk about our relationship? We haven't spoken about it since Paris. It's like nothing happened past the proposal.”
“Yeah, just let us start eating first.”
“What've you made?”
“Pasta.” I put our plates on the table and we started eating.
“I know you don't want to talk about it because you think you know what I'll say.”
“What will you say?”
“You think we're all a game. It hurts that you can boast about cheating on me just to upset someone else, to push Patsy out the picture and free up Liam. You forget about me when he's around.”
“I don't think that. It was just the heat of the moment, you know that. And I don't want Liam here any more than you do. I'm so sorry I hurt you and embarrassed you. What can I do to show you I love you and I just want to focus on our relationship?”
“I don't know… I don't know if I can shake the feeling that you and him are waiting for the right time and then I'll be gone.”
“No, we're not! I want to make it work with you. We can do this and deal with Noel and Liam.”
“Don't bring Noel into it. He doesn't come around trying to have you for himself while you're both pretending he's only here for the boys so I can't be annoyed about him being here.”
“He's no angel either. He would've been the same if I'd left him for someone but he cheated and left instead and isn't trying to come around because he's so far away with Meg.”
“You let them treat you how they like because you like their attention.”
“I try not to but it was like that so long and now I love them as fathers too so sometimes I do still have too much of a connection with them. I'll try to keep the boundaries up around him.”
“You're already spending all your time with him, you don't know how to have boundaries. When you're mad at him you can't wait to forgive him.”
She was right but she needed to know I was trying. “I'm sorry. I'm trying to just be friends and co-parents but we just don't know what the line is. I'm not going to cheat on you again. I swear I'm not going to.”
“You don't have to fight your feelings for him. It's not fair on any of us. I can walk away and we'll all be happy going our own ways. We can be friends.”
It hurt so much to think of her leaving me. “Please don't think you should go. I don't want you to go. I want us to be engaged and get married and stay together.”
“You didn't want to say yes when I asked.”
“I was surprised and I don't have your optimism that they'll change the law.”
“You don't think we'll last long enough for it to happen, not that they'll never change it.”
“I said yes and bought you a ring. This was supposed to be our time together, not for us to argue. We never argue.”
“Then we won't talk about anything tonight but we can't go on forever ignoring it just because we have rings.”
“I know but I just want to do good things for you so we can move past everything I did.”
“I appreciate it but I honestly don't know if I can trust you again and dragging it out is making it harder on all of us.”
“You can trust me. If I didn't think you could, I wouldn't be trying.”
“You did it to Noel for years. You've done it to me. Why would it be different now?”
“Because I don't want to let you down again.”
“You shouldn't have let me down the first time.”
“I really am sorry but I do want us to keep going. If we get past this we'll get married one day.”
She probably wasn't going to trust me for a long time especially with Liam coming in and out of our lives but she was giving me time. I had one last chance to get it right.
…
The tour of the Americas finishing saw Liam come back to us for the short time he had before he had to go away again for a two month European tour. This time we didn't object, it was his house he could do what he wanted. I liked having him there. The kid likes having him there. Lydia was getting used to it.
Lydia had an invite to a masquerade ball. She had some friends in costume design who had organised it all for a charity. We had been excited for it but as usual Liam complicated things.
He wasn't invited. He was supposed to stay home with the kids. He wouldn't be left out though. He begged to come even after I told him it was a boring charity thing, he'd have to wear a costume and he'd have to dance. I really tried to put him off but he wouldn't have it.
When I took him to the costumer I told them to give him everything he'd think ugly and uncomfortable to wear. It was a seventeen hundreds inspired pantomime ball so none of it was what we were used to. I hoped it would make him back out.
They showed him a mannequin, explaining the different elements. Brightly coloured breeches, shirts, waistcoats, stocking and buckled shoes. “The men are wearing these.”
“What's Stacy wearing?”
“A dress like this.” they pointed to another model.
“Why can't we wear what we like and just have the masks?”
“It'd look odd.”
“You don't have to wear any of it if you stay home.”
“Alright, it's just a suit.”
They somehow got him to try on the trousers, shirt, waistcoat and jacket he was going to be expected to wear. We hoped he would change his mind but he didn't.
…
Lydia’s mum was fascinated by the dresses when she came to collect the kids and the dog for the night. As a historian even though not one for this particular era of clothing, she found the historical inaccuracy hilarious. They tried to stick to the century but there was some modern twists.
“Do I get to see Liam’s get up too?”
“He's shy about it. I'm not sure he'll go now the time’s come.”
He was making excuses not to get ready. He wanted to get changed at the venue so no one could see him outside. I told him he wouldn't be let in if he wasn't dressed for it.
“He better not spoil it for you.”
“He won't, he's just being silly. Thanks for having the kids.”
I waved them off before going to help Liam.
He had put his shirt on so I helped him put the waistcoat on, doing up all the buttons for him.
”See, you look stunning.” I said as I ran my hands along the waistcoat. “Trousers next.”
I helped him into those too and did up even more buttons with lingering touches that would be inappropriate of other dressers.
“I know what you're doing.”
“Getting you ready so we can go.”
“Ready for what though? Putting your boobs in me face, touching me…”
“It's how the dress is.” I acted like it was all in his mind. “Let me help you with your shoes.”
He sat down and let me put his shoes on his feet like a reverse Cinderella.
…
When we entered the ball most people were already dancing in their couples. “This is all birds dancing with other birds and blokes with other blokes.” Liam commented to me. “This is one of your gay things.” He sounded shocked that something he'd invited himself to without knowing what it was because he didn't want to miss out wasn't for him.
“It's Lydia’s friend's thing.” I pointed out. “We did try to tell you.”
“No one better try kissing me cos of the mask.”
“Only if you flirt first.”
Someone who looked like they could wear their costume any day of the week approached us. “Oh you're trying the thruple thing, how cute.” he commented.
“No. He's just our friend.” I corrected, quickly.
“What’s a thruple thing?” Liam asked.
“One more than a couple.” the man explained. “Who's the unicorn?”
“Unicorn?”
“He doesn't know anyone, maybe you could show him around.” I suggested. “Teach him a thing or two.”
“Gladly. Come on.”
The man linked arms with Liam and walked off with him before he could say he wanted to stick with us. He was going to be distracted for a while so me and Lydia could have some time alone.
Once he was gone Lydia asked me to dance so we went to dance with everyone else who were doing some slow dance.
“This is nice.” I commented with my arms around her.
“Yeah, oddly peaceful.”
“There should be more events like this.”
“If it works there will be. Maybe we can go to one where we don't have to send Liam off with someone.”
I laughed. “Definitely. He'll be having fun but maybe next time he'll leave us to it.”
“What if he gets a taste for masquerade balls?”
“He has a taste for any kind of party. Are you getting a taste for them?”
“I think I'd rather it was set at another time more modern or something.”
“Like last century.”
“Yeah the tens, twenties, the forties, the sixties.”
“That's a lot of balls to arrange.”
“As long as I get to dance with you.”
Lydia started talking to some of her friends. They were talking about the fundraising the event was for and the attendants donating to the cause. They mentioned an anonymous donor giving a large donation. I wondered if it was Liam so I excused myself and went to find him.
I hoped it was him but if it was I felt bad that we'd been making fun of him and wishing he hadn't involved himself. He wasn't hard to find, while most other people were dancing or sat talking, he was stood like a wallflower which wasn't like him at all.
“Hey.” I pretended not to know him because we were both wearing our masks. “Would you dance with me?”
“Shouldn't I be the one to ask you?”
“No, the rules are different here. Anyone can ask anyone.”
“I know. I've had a few dances already.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, that man taught me a lot.”
“Your gay-bcs?”
“Exactly, so who is the unicorn?”
“No one. The unicorn would be someone who would want both of us equally. Someone who's hard to find.”
“We could find one. Everyone likes me. Everyone likes you. I don't need them to like me much anyway.”
“I only like people who don't like you.”
“I've noticed.”
“Can we dance?” I asked again and we moved onto the dancefloor with everyone. “You've had fun?”
“Yeah, it's been good.”
“Was it you who gave money?”
“How do you know about that? No one was supposed to know.”
“I know everything.”
“You guessed.”
“I know how generous you are and caring.”
“Well I try.”
“You didn't have to.”
“I wanted to. And it's not just because you're gay before decide it's about you.”
“Of course.”
“I liked LGBT people before you were gay.”
“You probably thought it was Liam Gallagher bacon lettuce.”
“Nah Liam Gallagher big trophies.”
After a long night at the ball I laid Lydia on our bed, diving into the layers of her dress to find her underwear. We wore modern underwear despite the historical theme of the rest of our outfits.
The dress was a lot of material that felt quite heavy, I thought I could suffocate if I stayed under there too long. After kissing her and teasing her through her underwear, I pulled them off her legs. I started to lick her clit, I felt her hand find my head to help guide me.
Liam walked in the room without knocking or anything. “I just wanted to say I had fun tonight.”
“Fuck off Liam.” I said, pulling my head out from underneath the dress to glare at him.
“Sorry. I didn't know.”
“Just fuck off.” I yelled.
“Alright! It's not like I haven't seen it all before.”
“Go!” Lydia ordered. “Leave us alone.”
He left the room and I went back between her legs. I wasn't sure which one of us was more annoyed that he'd interrupted. While I continued to make love to her I wondered if he was in his room thinking about the scene he'd walked in on. Lydia must've been thinking about it too because she was quieter than usual like she didn't want him to hear if he was listening in.
We helped each other out of the dresses and cuddled on the bed.
“Do you think he was being honest?”
“He had a good time but he knew he was walking in on something.”
“What did he want? To interrupt? To watch? To join in?”
“He was learning about unicorns and poly relationships and stuff all night.”
“Do you think he thought he was getting rewarded for his donation?”
I shook my head. She figured out it was him too. He couldn't stay hidden in a masked ball. Whatever his intentions were, it really helped the event's total raised. They'd probably want him available for every event they put on in future.

Author Note- I don't like it when other people apologise for taking a while to post but I've disappeared since February or something so sorry I can't believe it's been so long this year's gone fast. Hope it was worth waiting that all time.
I went right off of writing these Oasis stories. I've been trying to write an original story for a while which I need to get back to since i haven't written any of it for a few weeks.
In July Lilly dog got ill or more ill with her heart so I've been scared about that a lot. I wouldn't wrap her present until 2 days before Christmas but she was there trying to get to presents early and then opening up her presents trying to get parents to hand over all the meat!
I got a job in October in a florists (putting the information on the computer and serving customers not making the flowers) I didn't know so many people want flowers at Christmas!
I've had a good Christmas. Hope you've had a good Christmas and a good year.