OBLIVIOUS REDEMPTION

CHAPTER 91: His Futile Effort

~The tranquility of the soul rests in one's reconciliation with the realities of life~

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Yasmeen

As the days pass by, I continue to heal, my heart knitting itself back together. I begin to allow myself to think about the odds of getting back with Ahmad, even though our life together was raised on the shakiest foundation

I waited impatiently for the day of my meeting with him. Time felt slower when we do nothing but wait and waiting seems like the most difficult thing to do, I realised it is one of the most miserable occupations known to man. But even a snail will eventually reach its destination.

While I waited, I thought of the number of friends I had seen marry, how many homes with children in them I had seen growing up around me, how I had contentedly pursued this lone quiet path for Ahmad. The memory of us living together is cursed with all the things that happened.

When the day of the meeting finally came, Ahmad came as promised. The hours of waiting have been transformed into tension, the tension has become fear, and that fear of facing him again after what he had done makes me embarrassed about how a part of me has once considered giving him another chance

"Good afternoon" I greeted him, avoiding any eye contact. He answered before taking his seat

We parted, weeks passed, we met again and the meeting proved no reunion, offered no warm memories, only the acid knowledge that time had passed and things weren't as bright or attractive as I expected because I am still tied to him

He was glad to see me, but his soul was ringing like a well-struck bell. It was a bell that rang with more than joy, hope and adoration, there was the sound there too of anger and resentment because I would not look at him and I did not want to be in his presence. I hated him for the things he did to me and he hated me too for not running back to him

"We are not here to accuse or scold anyone, we are here to make amends, to find a solution and hopefully reconcile. I want to hear both of you out, I want to know both sides of the story before we could reach a verdict. let's start with you Ahmad, Tell me what happened" said my second cousin who I call my brother because he has always been a part of our family when we were all settled down

"Well, what has happen has happened. I am here to take my wife home. We still love each other, Our only problem was communication and it's solely Yasmeen's fault, she never talks to me, she just assumes" Ahmad said, with an air of arrogance

"Then why did you tell her to go?" My brother asked

"Because she wronged me, but I specifically told her that it is not a divorce, I told her to be gone for just two weeks. But the next thing I saw was Yasmeen living her life, she resumed work as if nothing has happened and she refused to come back to my house after those two weeks" Ahmad said bitterly

"Did you ask her why?" My brother asked

"No, because she never answers my calls. But I'll be the bigger person and apologize. Whatever you are accusing me of, I'm sorry, forgive me. Let's end it here and go back to our house" he said, looking at me

In that moment, it seemed like all that greedy or self-absorbed Ahmad, cruel as he is, only wanted his wife back. And all I wanted was to be myself, to be free and whole again

A part of me wanted to forgive him, But I thought against it. Because I know quite well that the only vice that cannot be forgiven is hypocrisy. The repentance of a hypocrite is itself hypocrisy. And my Trust for him is like a gasoline-soaked blanket that succumbs to the matches of betrayal, never able to be used for its warmth again