OBLIVIOUS REDEMPTION

CHAPTER 64: What Lies Beneath

"Our envy always lasts longer than the happiness of those we envy"

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Yasmeen

My life is made up of tiny puzzle parts that no longer fit together. Imagine working on a puzzle only to find that the final picture can never be complete because one of its pieces is missing. This is exactly what's happened to my life and my marriage, it has become impossible to put it back together

On my soft bed delicate, I lay wide awake and full of dreams. I am walking through darkness with thoughts full of colors

For several moments, I couldn't hear anything over the violent pounding of my pulse. Then I remembered today is a big day for me, the new car I bought arrives in the afternoon. I quickly got out of bed and got ready

I managed to raise the money for the car from my personal savings, end of the year profit and bonuses, to turn over for contract deals I have been awarded with

For the first time in months, my heart raced, and the old excitement flickered inside me. I walked to the front door in silence, but in an invisible, vibrating pocket of excitement.

I was about to leave the house when the symbol of my suffering "Ahmad" came to sight

I couldn't hide the excitement in my eyes, even though it was hurting Ahmad. He watched me bitterly because he knows there is nothing he could do to take that moment away from me.

I looked at him and realized that the saddest thing is to be a minute to someone, when you've made them your eternity

I also realized that In any relationship, there is this moment when a person who was a part of you just an instant ago becomes a surrealistically familiar stranger. After that moment, inertia and denial can only delay the inevitable

I stared at his face, seeking something familiar. When we made eye contact, something in me ached because I found it. But It's like we are involved in that awkward procedure of getting to unknow and unlove each other

I know that the future is uncertain but the end is always near. It was as if my doom so floated me on that I couldn't stop

I hurried out of the house and headed to my office which is the meeting point with the car dealer. When it was noon, he brought my beautiful car. Ahmad was the first person I called when I saw it and he was the first person I wanted to show it to. I drove home with a wide smile plastered on my face

"Ahmad, it's here" I screamed as soon as I arrived. He rushed down the stair case, taking three stair at a time

"The car is nice, I'm really happy for you" he managed to say, which is obviously forced out

Unfortunately, his words didn't match his facial expressions. It didn't look like he is genuinely happy for me, though he pretended to be. But he had been restless ever since he saw the car, he had a sleepless night after long hours of silence. At some point, he had to take some sleeping pills to be able to get an hour of sleep.

Now I have a clear picture of what really lies beneath the facade he's putting on. How sad and how frightening it is to me, seeing Ahmad filled with so much hate, jealousy and envy that he could not even be genuinely happy for me and rejoice in my victory

How did he ever come to that point?

I raked my brain trying to make sense of the situation, but I couldn't. It didn't make any sense

"From now on, I'll be using your car for long journeys or road trips. It's a strong car, it's stronger than mine" he said, as soon as he woke up from his one hour sleep the next morning