OBLIVIOUS REDEMPTION

CHAPTER 99: Where He Leads Me

~Love hard when there is love to be had, because perfect guys don’t exist. But there is always one guy that is perfect for you~

☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

Yasmeen

Sometimes you go through things that seem huge at the time, like a mysterious glowing cloud devouring your entire community. While they're happening, they feel like the only thing that matters and you can hardly imagine that there's a world out there that might have anything else going on. And then the glow cloud moves on. And you move on. And the event is behind you. And you find that as time passes, you remember it less and less.

My suffering in Ahmad’s house has turned into a gift, in it is hidden mercy and miracles. And now born from the ashes, I am like a warrior in bloodied black.

I hated Ahmad for making me cry very often, but I am grateful for where the tears have taken me. I take pleasure in my transformations.

The independence, sense of responsibility, the growth and new found confidence combined with the knowledge that anonymous is always there for me gives me a great feeling of joy and fulfillment

My scars remind me that I did indeed survive my deepest wounds. That in itself is an accomplishment. And they bring to mind something else, too. They remind me that the pain Ahmad has inflicted on me has, in many places, left me stronger and more resilient. What hurt me in the past has actually made me better equipped to face the present.

I woke up happy as today marks the end of my waiting period, I quickly grabbed my phone to check the time. And there it was, a message from anonymous waiting to be read by me

*************************

Hey Beautiful,

“Let’s meet. Friday night, beneath the stars, In a field behind your yard”

Love, anonymous ❤️

**************************

Joy is to fun what the deep sea is to a puddle, Joy comes always after pain. I thought as I finished reading the message

Suddenly, I had a wild thrill such as I had never known, joy, fear, madness, excitement

Anonymous has a charm about him sometimes, a warmth that was irresistible, like sunshine

I realized that happiness already exists in my life. All I need to do is tune into it, And I can start doing that right now. Life moved on and so did I

Falling for anonymous would be like cliff diving. It would be either the most exhilarating thing that ever happened to me or the stupidest mistake I would ever make. 

Either ways, I am ready to commit the murder I was imprisoned for. I am ready to fall in love again, for to never make yourself vulnerable again, to never step into areas that suggest new warmth and light, is to continue living under the cold shadow of the same awful pain.

Time flew as we looked forward to the day of our meeting enjoying each other’s company

We exchanged meaningless sweet words. There could have been no two hearts so open, no tastes so similar, no feelings so in unison like ours. We are the sugar in life’s cup of tea.

I didn't just like anonymous, I needed him. Not in some desperate "you complete me" sort of way. No, He didn’t make me whole. He improved me. Something about him had a way of amplifying the good in my nature while muting the bad. He was a catalyst for my soul. I didn't need him in order to exist. I needed him in order to be a better stronger and more independent me.

But as time went by, I started to feel bare. I didn't know I wore my secrets as armor until they were gone and now anonymous sees me as I really am. I showed him my worst self, and my most vulnerable self and vice versa

He is the sky full of surprises. His dreams were blue and breathtaking as a bright day and his secrets were dark and poetic as a cold night. Either way, he was the most beautiful mess that I had ever come known

Whenever I talked, He just listens. He isn't shocked, He isn't surprised. He listens to me because he knows the shame, the guilt, the sorrow and the rage I went through. And he does not judge me. He just listens.

And when at last I found someone to whom I feel I can pour out my soul, I stop in shock at the words I utter. They are sincere and pure, but so rusty, so raw, so meaningless and feeble from being kept in the small cramped dark inside me for so long.

He made me realize we fall in love most deeply with those who have known our demons, They are the ones we love with the marrow in our bones, not the ones who see the best in us. It's the ones who have stroked the worst in us, these are the ones who stain our veins. These are the ones we call home.

I don't pretend to know what love is for everyone, but I can tell u what it is for anonymous. love is knowing all about someone, and still wanting to be with them more than any other person. Love is trusting them enough to tell them everything about yourself, including the things you might be ashamed of. Love is feeling comfortable and safe with someone, but still getting weak knees when they walk into a room and they smile at you

He believes that the best way to love someone is not to change them, but instead, help them reveal the greatest version of themselves.

He thought me that It is better to live your own destiny imperfectly than to live an imitation of somebody else's life

He thought me that it is okey to say NO to complicated, dead-end, unhealthy, and toxic relationships

He thought me how to Smile, Giggle, Marvel, trust, hope, wish, believe, and to LOVE again. Most of all, enjoy every moment of the journey, and appreciate where I am at this moment instead of always focusing on where I have been or how far I have to go.

We fell into the love that had been lying beneath our love like water below ice, and understood that while we had been having a lot of fun together we had only been skating on the surface, and now we are beginning to go in as deep as we could go.

We seek the fire of the spark that is already within us. Our passions began delicately and then they inflame the fire.

Love is truly the sweetest and slowest form of suicide. If only he knew how strongly I felt, he would have revealed his identity to me. I am not used to the possessive, or the savage joy he brings to my heart. It ate at my control

I and anonymous have a strong connection, We are one huge universe speaking and listening to itself.

This is new and exciting, the joy of being a team running through me like a wild fire.

We are all as much continuous as a wave is continuous with the ocean, satisfied with each others peculiarities and find jewels in their loopholes.

The true miracle lies in our eagerness to allow, appreciate, and honor the uniqueness, and freedom of each other. We sang the songs of our hearts freely

Every single one of us is a unique vibration in a beautiful Symphony of life’s Infinite creation

And ever since we started talking, I hardly ever thought of Ahmad. He had worn a place for himself in some corner of my heart, as a sea shell, always boring against the rock. The making of the place had been my pain. But now the shell was safely in the rock. It was lodged, and ground no longer. Though I always wondered why he did what he did to me and why he is still seeking for an audience from me. I felt like hearing him out even if it’s for just a second, even if it
doesn’t make any sense.

☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

Thanks For Reading 🌹
Love You All 😘
Don't Forget To Vote, Share & Comment ♥️