Looking at you side ways

Epilogue

2 years later.[/b]

Meredith went into the resident locker room and quickly changed.[i] Her body was still humming from morning sex with Derek.[/i] She looked up as Cristina came out of the bathroom looking like death warmed over.

Meredith asked concerned, "Cris. Are you okay?"

Cristina walked over to her locker and glared at Meredith, "Do I look okay? I just threw my guts up again! The problem is estrogen Mer. I used to be all business and then he goes and gets me pregnant! I am having hormone surges. He ruined me! I'm ruined. He turned me into this fat, stupid, pregnant girl. Who cares! Estrogen. It's not us. It's them and their stupid boy penis!"

Meredith replied happily, "Yeah. It's the penis." She was thinking [i]about Derek's huge penis pulsating in her this morning. So thick and so big and so...................[/i]

Cristina snarked, "Are you listening? My heart rate is 110. I'm burning 3000 calories a day. My legs are swollen. I've got indigestion and gas. Do you know that carrying a boy in your uterus means you burn ten percent more calories than if you had a girl? I can guess what I'm carrying? I don't need a fucking sonogram to tell me! I know it! Men! From the very beginning they just suck the life right out of you!"

Meredith watched as Cristina quickly changed and said sincerely, "I'm sorry Cris."

Cristina softened a little and asked, "So how was your vacation?"

Meredith giggled and said, "It was like a second honeymoon. Well, except it was Paris and not Venice. We slept late and had breakfast in bed every day. We walked everywhere and the weather was great. I got all my Christmas shopping done early and we ate like pigs. I had omelets, and cheese and croissants and.........."

Cristina snapped, "Let me quess? You ate like a pig in Paris and I saw Hawaii through digital pictures that Owen took while I threw up all day! Leading a charmed life I see!"

Meredith lied and said softy, "I had a few bad............."

"You're a bad liar. Save it! It's karma. Its Murphy's fucking law! Whatever. My God! Don't you have any pregnancy symptoms? Please tell me have problems sleeping or have horrible hemorrhoids! Give me something!"

Meredith replied sheepishly, "I'm horny 24/7." [i]That was her only pregnancy symptom so far.[/i]

"FUCK!"

"Sorry."

Cristina strode over to where Meredith was and lifted her scrub top up to expose her still flat stomach.

"We have the same due date. You barely gained a pound and I've put on twenty! I'm going to be pushing out a huge basketball of a boy and you're going to have a petite little girl with perfect fucking hair."

Meredith said, "Maybe you're having twins?"

"Bite your fucking tongue Meredith Shepherd!.............. Well, that would be the most efficient thing. So help me God, if my kid has my crazy curly hair and its red like Owens............"

"Cris! Pull it together. We can't let the interns know we are pregnant!"

"Fuck! You are right. We don't want them to know until............."

"Until they think we are more than just fat!"

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Derek was waiting in line to get coffee. Mark walked up and got in line with him and said excitedly, "Have I got news for you!"

Derek looked at him quizzically. "Morning to you too Sloan."