Looking at you side ways

41

Meredith had wandered to the nurse's station to file lab reports in patient's files. [i]Dr. Bailey had come up to her and said she could go home if she wanted. It was two hours before the end of her shift and she really wanted to leave. Mark had just told her that her mother was still sleeping. But Derek wanted her to wait for him and she thought she really needed him tonight. Maybe she would just hide quietly in the lobby.[/i] She told Dr. Bailey she would think about it and went to the locker room to wash her face and brush her teeth. As she crossed the overlook she glanced out at the darkening storm clouds and sky. [i]Perfect [/i]thought Meredith.[i] A raging thunderstorm was headed their way.[/i] She opens the locker room to find Addison in there. She ignores her and starts changing.

Addison looks over at Grey and thinks [i]what a little liar she is. Little Miss smugness about her mother, the famous Dr. Grey. [/i]

"So Meredith. I thought you said your mom was traveling? You must have had her locked up somewhere close to here the whole time."

Meredith decides to just ignore her.[i] Maybe she will get a clue.[/i] Addison is incensed that Meredith isn't even bothering to pretend to converse.

"Aren't you at all concerned about the crazy Alzheimer's being heredity? I mean why waste your time becoming a doctor when all the information may fly out of your head in a few years?"

Meredith finishes changing and still doesn't respond to Addison. [i]She's been dealing with this for years. She won't allow anything Addison says about her mother to affect her. She's been in avoidance mode about her mother for a few years now. She's going to wait in the lobby for Derek and let him drive her home.[/i]

Addison walks up to Meredith and gets in her face.

"So did Derek fuck you yet?"

"Wa...What?"

"Did you let Derek fuck you yet? I suppose you run around your house half naked and throw your tits and ass in his face. He is a man after all. But let me give you a clue. Once he fucks you, it's over. He won't want you again. He likes his one night stands. And if he didn't want me again after sex, he certainly wouldn't want you. You are just a pathetic liar who got into this program because of their mommy. Besides Derek needs a woman, not a little kid who needs her hand held all the time." [i]Addison had seen Derek pull Meredith into an empty room earlier. When she had come out, she looked like she had pulled herself together.[/i]

Addison looked at satisfaction at the devastation on Grey's face.[i] Her work here was done. It was a good thing Yang wasn't around to defend her little friend. [/i]Addison left the locker room with a backward glance.

"Grey. You aren't tough enough to be a surgeon. Why not get out before you really embarrass yourself. More so than you already have."

Meredith clenched her fists and fought the urge to cry.[i] She would cry when she got home. All her insecurities were coming to a head. She wasn't a good daughter. She hadn't protected her mother's secret. She wasn't a good doctor. She should have caught on that there was something wrong medically with her. Derek wouldn't want her after he knew how scary and damaged she was.[/i] She made her way out to the lobby undetected. She quickly flipped open her phone and let Dr. Bailey know she was indeed going home.

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In the meantime, Derek stands over Ellis and hopes she wakes up soon.[i] He thought that in sleep her face would relax and be gentle like Meredith's. But it's not. She still has an angry arrogant face as if the world owes her everything.[/i] He see's her open her eyes and she is a little startled.

"Oh please Thatcher. I've had a long day. Go away."

"No."

"What do you mean no?"

"No. I know you don't like me very much, but the fact is I don't like you very much either. I don't like the way you speak to me and I don't like the way you speak to Meredith. She deserves so much better from you."

Ellis is shocked at what he is saying and says, "I'm sorry."

Derek asks, "Are you?"

Sighing Ellis asks, "What's wrong with me Thatcher?"

"The mass on your liver is..."

Ellis interrupts him and asks, "Is it algebra? Damn it! I mean is it alge...is it malignant?" She is struggling to find the correct word.

"No. It's benign."

"Well, at least that is good news. When can I get out of here?"

"It's going to be a few days. Do you want to see Meredith now? And please be nice to her."

"Meredith? Who is Meredith? I think I need to go to sleep now." She closes her eyes and Derek shakes his head.[i] How does Meredith do this? It was exhausting for him and it hadn't even been eight hours. And he wasn't related to her.[/i]

Meredith just left the lobby when the skies opened up and she got drenched.[i] She didn't care.[/i] Instead of running to the car, she just walked slowly letting her tears wash down her face with the rain.

Derek found Dr. Bailey with the Chief by the OR board. He gave them an update on Ellis.

The Chief said," Good work with Ellis Grey Shepherd. You were the only one that managed to control her."

"She thought I was her husband."

The Chief replied, "Really? You look nothing like him." The Chief walked off.

Derek looked questionably at Dr. Bailey, "The Chief knows Thatcher too? Did the Chief know Meredith when she was little?"

"Not my business Shepherd. Nor do I care. Good work today. I know Alzheimer's patients can be debilitating to care for."

"Well I had help. I had Dr. Sloan do the initial examination."

[i]Dr. Bailey already knew that but respected him for giving credit where credit was due.[/i]

She said, "Dr. Johansson is asking for you for a pancreatic resection. He should be in OR 3 shortly."

Derek scowled and looked at his watch." My shift is over in an hour and a half. Isn't that a longer surgery?"

Dr. Bailey raised an eyebrow at him and said, "You have somewhere else you need to be?"

Sighing Derek said, "I told Meredith not to leave without me. I was hoping to leave on time today."

"She left a little while ago, so I don't think that will be a problem."

"What?"

"I let her go a little while ago. I am surprised she made it as long as she did. She put in an eight hour shift."

"God Damn it!" Derek shouted. [i]He wondered what happened that she didn't at least call him to let him know she was leaving.[/i] Some of the nurses around the board stared at the intern swearing in front of his resident.

Dr. Bailey narrowed her eyes at him and asked astounded, "You did not just curse at me?"

Derek ran his hand through his hair roughly. "Sorry. Sorry. I am worried about Meredith. You have no idea what that girl's been through."

"She's a fighter. She's tough. She will get through this."

Derek shook his head and said, "No. No she won't. Not without some support from her friends. Yang and Sloan are working overnight. I need to get home and be with her."

"You are giving up a pancreatic resection to go home for Dr. Grey?"[i] Bailey just wanted to make sure she understood.[/i]

"Yeah. I can get another intern to cover the last couple hours of my shift. I won't leave you short handed."

Dr. Bailey thought a while and said, "Don't bother. I have it under control. I'll scrub in myself with Dr. Johansson. I'll tell him you are still working with Ellis Grey."

"Thanks Dr. Bailey. I really appreciate this."

"Go! Go be with her."

Derek ran down the hall towards the locker room as Dr. Bailey shook her head.

[i]Interns [/i]thought Bailey. [i]She had learned a lot about all of them today. Their strengths and weakness, and personal and professional ethics. And now she had a new problem. Two of them were in love with each other. [/i]