The Shine

Remember, what the dormouse said

Last night I returned to Lights Out Xtreme Wrestling for my promised match. The site of this long awaited showdown was the prestigious Cascade Holiday Inn in Akron.

I don't know how many people were at the show. I believe my previous record at the bullfighting ring in Mexico was beaten. At the bullring the people were far away, having them all crammed in around us made it seem like ten times as many.

When I worked for Lights Out before it was a decent show. I didn't know they could draw a crowd like this. Before the show started there were tons of people at the merch tables. I really should get some merch. Of course I'd need money for that to happen.

I didn't talk to my opponent before the match. I didn't even know who it was until I saw her to the ring. We were the last match before intermission, which can go either way. Sometimes people are already checked out. Sometimes they treat it like a mini-main event. This crowd was hot.

I came to the ring unannounced, which I like. Most people hate it because it makes you look unimportant but there's something about being unknown I find appealing. My opponent came out to one of those songs that they play in every movie about Vietnam. Something by the Doors.

She was dressed like a ballerina. Not in a pink tutu, but with tights and a leotard maybe. I don't really know what it all was. She did have those ballet shoes on. She looked like she had been run over by a dirtbike and then left in a ditch for a couple weeks. Her gear was all torn up and dirty. And bloody.

She didn't shuffle to the ring like a zombie but she had a deliberate and strange way to coming down to the ring. She was introduced as "McSweeny" and the crowd went nuts. I get what the promoter meant now. With her looking like that and me with my mask it's a vibe like Su Yung and Rosemary. The referee did a great job of selling it too. He acted like he was scared to death of her.

When the bell rung she came at me like a wildcat. We hadn't discussed anything beforehand and we barely said anything to each other in the ring. We were just scrapping. From a certain POV it was the worst match I ever had. We hardly did anything but brawl. We were going too fast and not selling much.

From another POV it was my best match ever. It was like a real fight. Not a real real fight, but what people think is a real fight because of fights in movies. We were through the ropes and into the crowd in the first thirty seconds. We were smashing into fans and tripping over ourselves and the people loved it. At one point she kicked an obnoxious fan who got in her way.

It was wild. Normally a street fight match is used for a feud. They used to be feudkillers in the old days but they're tame by today's standards. I had never worked a gimmick match before. I heard they're supposed to be easier, if more painful, because you can use props instead of doing moves but I was gassed after a couple minutes. Wrestling is more demanding cardio than people think.

I was puffing like a train for a second but I got it together. It was a nine minute match that felt like forty seconds it was so furious. In the end she hit me with the Nutcracker Suite and pinned me. What other finish would a battered ballerina use? The crowd was going crazy like they had just seen the Superbowl.

The promoter paid me $220, which is more than we agreed upon. He told me good matches get bonuses. When I went looking for her backstage to thank her I saw she was in street clothes talking to the guy in the crowd she kicked. Must be her husband or BF. Out of her gear she looked like a kindergarten teacher. With them was a little girl, who was excitedly telling her about the stray cat she saw. It was grey.

I didn't want to intrude at that moment and then she was gone. Some of the other people on the show told me that's what she's like. She doesn't socialize or hang around, she does her job and then goes home. That kind of attitude rubs people the wrong way usually but everyone seemed to love her. One guy was grinning as he told me "She's a ghost, man."

I like that.

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