A couple years ago a video was making the rounds of a "soccer mom" getting mercilessly pummeled by an MMA fighter. The narrative wasn't exactly right, the woman was a fighter, she was just a shitty fighter. Whenever you look at the early fights of a boxer or MMA person, you see a lot of opponents they beat with 0-3 careers. She's one of those. Someone who had a dream and was quickly shown that dream was not a good idea.
I'm pretty sure I saw that woman at the gym this morning. I wondered if people like her and I ever fight each other. Do the people pulling the strings know who's who and they make sure it's always a legit fighter against a loser?
I have a dream to run a wrestling tournament with all the guys that always lose on TV. The tagline would be "someone's got to win". And then they would be crowned champion of the jobbers. I think people would watch that.
One of the guys I have in mind brings an ax to the ring. I don't mind when someone has a prop. Baseball bat. "Singapore" cane. Magic urn. Branding iron. Mjolnir. That's all fine. What bugs me is when someone has a prop that can't be used.
A lot of crazy shit happens in wrestling. But you cannot hit someone with an axe. I think there was a Viking dude that brought a sword to the ring in the olden times too. Same thing. That does no good. Give me something I can use.
On the other hand. I started thinking that with my fetch, I could do anything. That's the beauty of wrestling, no matter what happens people assume it's fine. A guy fell to his death once and everyone just shrugged because they thought it was supposed to happen. Maybe I could have my fetch get hacked with an axe. Or hit with a sledgehammer.
On that Amazing Johnathan documentary, they showed some of his old tricks. He did stuff like sawing off his hand and stabbing through his tongue. Blood went everywhere. He billed himself as the Freddie Krueger of magic.
Maybe I could do something like that. I think I'd have to learn how to make my fetch bleed for it to work though. In the words of the Da Maniac "You gotta make it gruesome, these people, they like blood you know."
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