Please Don't Give Up- [Shanexoc]

Chapter 35 Moving in

It was the first night in Ian's place, Jas brought her stuffed animals, her pillow and some clothes. There was no use to bring them all at once, they weren't sure she wanted to stay. To make today's impression last, they stayed in the living room until past her bedtime watching movies. Who knew Ian was so invested in Barbie movie's lore? Everytime he started whispering about it to Shane, the taller would chuckle. It was a nice moment. They had a ton of popcorns, Ian was crocheting has he watched the movie, meanwhile Shane was on and off of his phone.

Shane: Are you making a plushie?- he whispered, Ian looked at him.

Ian: Yeah, it's a bunny.

Shane: Why are you making it?- the other looked away, his eyes going to Jas, before going back to his partner, Shane chuckled - You're adorable.- he said before gently kissing the other. Then again. Has he was going for another one, Ian stopped him.

Ian: Jas, remember?

Shane: Oh yeah right.- he said embarrassed, moving away. If not by the lighting the younger would have noticed the other's rosey cheeks- Speaking of which she's awfully quiet.- he said getting up, seeing Jas laying down on the blankets and pillows, her pillow fort had fallen a while back and right now, in it's ruins was the little girl, in a deep sleep. Shane chuckled once more, before picking her up.

Ian: Mph. I was like that when I was a kid.- he said putting down his stuff and turning on the lights so the other wouldn't trip- You know, I'm able to do a lot of things now and maybe I could get busy renovating the bedroom, her bedroom.

Shane: I love how you care so much.... Makes me feel less alone in this.- he said has they went upstairs.

Ian: Hey, I like the parenting free trial. Although one day I'd like to step up a bit and be kinda of a step father or something... Y'all's relationship is too complicated for me to keep up whit the labels but yeah. I would like to raise her whit you, if you'd like that.

Shane: I would.- he said has he went into the guest bedroom, laying down Jas, before pulling up the covers- Wanna finish eating those popcorns... Or finish the movie? You seam very invested.- he said has they went back downstairs to clean up the mess.

Ian: There's no need, I think I've seen that movie at least five times by now.

Shane: Dayum.

Ian: It was a nice childhood tho... I bet if I was cis I wouldn't be able to see my precious barbie movies.

Shane: Well, I had never seen one and  turned out fine, so there isn't a problem.

Ian:Oh? So you're telling me your depression isn't because you didn't watch Barbie movie's?- he asked jockingly, has they went back upstairs.

Shane: Maybe. But then what's yours because?- the taller jocked back, but now it didn't felt like it was a joke. Ian went quiet for a second.

Ian: I wish I knew.- he said has he entered the bedroom, closing the door behind him.

Shane: I'm sorry, I shouldn't had said that.

Ian: It's fine... It's something I ask myself quite a lot... Don't you?- he asked taking off his pants before seating in bed.

Shane: I never actually did it.... I guess to me there's always been obvious reasons... I lived a miserable life.

Ian: I wish that was that simple whit me.... I get so caught up in my head I convince myself I have no reason to be depressed.

Shane: Maybe you don't. It can just be a chemical imbalance.

Ian: But that's what I fear... I know it's just imposter symdrom kicking in but, I feel like it isn't a valid reason for me to be depressed.

Shane: But it is.- he said seating besides his lover putting his hand on top of the other's.- We don't need to have a justification for everything, sometimes, things are just like that. I get why you'd be looking for sort of reason but, you'll just end up tiring yourself out... And digging yourself into a bigger hole then you are.... I know it's hard but, try to accept it.

Ian: Is that what you did to deal whit your alcoholism?- he asked resting his head on the taller's shoulder.

Shane: You could say so... Are the meds working?- he asked, rubbing the younger's thigh.

Ian: Yeah... Just sucks I'm probably be sticking whit them forever.

Shane: You won't... And even if you did, it's fine.

Ian: I know... It's just kinda annoying cuz I keep thinking there might be a time where I can't afford them.

Shane: I won't let that happen alright?... But for the time being, we should probably go to sleep.- the younger moved away from the other, before gently kissing him.

Shane held the other's left hand that was on his face, kissing back. It was raining outside, the room was cosy, so they felt like they wanted to stay like that forever. Ian moved his right hand onto the other's thigh, moving his hand up and down. Meanwhile the taller pulled the other in through the waist, the farmer now onto the other's legs. Shane started to move his leg, that's when the younger pulled away.

Ian: W-we probably shouldn't.- the older sighed.

Shane: You're right... At least not tonight....- he added has they moved away and laid on the bed- Are the walls like shit?

Ian:Are you asking me if she could hear us?

Shane: Yes.

Ian: Well, when you were in that bedroom you heard me jack off?

Shane: Not that recall.

Ian: That's your answer.... When we do it we should probably be mindful and not be that loud... I'm not sure of the extent of the sound proof.

Shane: Yeah you're right...- the younger got closer to him.

Ian: If we have any special days se should probably leave her in Marnie's place...

Shane: Like on your birthday?

Ian: Yeah... Mmmh... Night.- he said slowly closing his eyes, the older rubbing his back.

Shane: Goodnight love.

I hope you enjoyed the chapter if so please comment your thoughts and vote.
Much love!!

-MissevilXD