It's always been you

Chapter 52 - You what?!

JOSEPH POV

I got back to Lucy's townhouse, home, about 2 in the afternoon and she wasn't home. So much for my surprising her. Should I just ring her and tell her I'm here? Then I remembered. It's Friday. She had her counselling session with Sean today. He'd done great things for her and really helped her with her grief.

I couldn't go and see him myself though. I'd feel so uncomfortable telling him how I felt about her knowing he was her grief counsellor helping her deal with the death of Ollie. Nuh uh. Not a good idea.

I decided to sit around and wait for her to come home with Billy, and then maybe cook her some dinner. I still felt this uncontrollable urge to take care of her even though I knew she was perfectly willing and able to look after herself. She knew she had to be for Billy's sake.

As I sat there my mind drifted to thoughts of Camille. I had this overwhelming guilt over how things had ended and wanted to make things right. I knew she was staying friends with Lucy and our whole gang and I didn't want there to be any kind of awkwardness or make anyone feel like they needed to choose sides between us. And after 5 years together she was still such a good friend. A best friend. I didn't want to just let her walk out of my life but I knew I might have to if she decides it was too hard to remain friends.

After sitting around waiting for Lucy and Billy for a while I decided to head over to see Camille and clear the air a bit more. I was just hoping she'd agree to talk to me. I really really missed her. Not in a romantic way. But she was such a huge part of my life and now all of a sudden she's gone. If it was too hard for her to see me after all this time and try to remain friends I would understand.

I pulled up outside the apartment building where Camille was still sharing the flat with Nikki and Hannah and pressed the buzzer for their flat. "Hello?" I heard Camille's voice. "Hi bab-....Camille it's Joe." There was a pause and then the door buzzed open. As I trekked up the stairs to the flat I heard the door open and her head popped out. "Whatcha doing here Joe?" "I came to say hello and check in." She stepped aside and let me in.

"I've just got home myself." There was a bit of an awkward pause before she said "tea?" "Please." As she made the teas I looked around the flat that I used to live in before Ollie died, my eyes landing on a photo of the gang from Ollie and Lucy's wedding. The photographer had caught us all mid jump. I picked up the frame and studied the photo, a few tears escaped and rolled down my cheeks, landing on the glass of the photo frame.

I didn't realise Camille had appeared next to me holding out a mug tea so I swiped quickly at my eyes, embarrassed. "Sorry." "Joseph don't you dare apologise for that. I miss him too." She looked at the photo for a bit longer and a few tears filled her eyes too before she blinked them away. Should I hug her? Before I could answer my own question she turned and buried her face in my chest softly crying. I placed our mugs of tea on the coffee table and then wrapped my arms around her shoulders, kissing the top of her head.

"Joe?" "Mmm?" "Do you think we'll ever get over this?" "Honestly? No. But I'm hoping it'll get easier for all of us. Especially Lucy." "Me too." There was another pause before she pulled away from the hug and looked down not making eye contact. Uh oh. She has something she feels guilty about. "Spit it out Camille." She took a deep breath and then said "I'm seeing someone." "Oh....that's great! I'm happy for you!"

She still wouldn't make eye contact. "Camille?" "It's Ben." ".......what!" "Joseph you can't be angry at me. We split up months ago! And we both know it was over long before that!" "No no I'm not angry! I'm sorry, just surprised!...wow! Does Lucy know?" Camille blushed and looked down again. "Maybe." "Oh god what?" "She might have walked in on us having sex this morning."