IKIGAI / Jake Sully

40

As it grows closer to dusk most of the people usually find a place to watch the pollination begin.

I let out a yawn.

"Tired?" Jake asks, scooping me up into his arms. I laid on his chest. Letting my feet dangle over his forearm.

"Are you not? We're going on all night without sleep" I ask him glancing upwards at Jake.

"I'm used to it."

"How?"

"Well the war means I don't have the luxury to just sleep when I want to." Jake explains strolling around to find a good spot.

"What's the longest you've gone without sleep?"

"Uh? 3 days maybe 4 if I don't count having a 10 minute nap" he says

"Do you ever regret going to war?" I ask him as he sets me down underneath a large tree trunk. Private on both sides so it would just be us.

"Everything I do will always come with some form of regret." He explains "Comes with the territory of being a leader, regardless of what choice I make there's always going to be a bad side."

A lady walks by to give us a lit candle and a blanket as the sun begins to start to set. Jake gives the candle to me to keep my hands warm.

"But there's also a good side" I say and he just half grins.

"Yeah well...everything I do...as long as I come home to you. Safe and sound, I don't mind a few sleepless nights" Jake says "Although Tsu'tey isn't as fun of a company but I make it work"

And I laugh "so you share a room with Tsu'tey?"

"Kinda. We work opposite shifts. When I'm here. He's running things up there. So it's rare that we're both at heaven's gate simultaneously but...technically, yeah. He's my cuddle buddy." Jake says plopping down behind me and laying his head on my shoulders.

He wraps the blanket around the both of us as I place the candle down on one side.

There is something about being in his arms that feel so safe. I look down at the faded scars that tattooed his body. Some more prominent than others. Some cuts are small while others look massive.

Tracing each raised mark with my finger, trailing down from his bicep to his hands.

"What if one day you actually die out on the field?" I ask

"You'll miss me?" He chuckles

"That's not funny." I retorted back to him "Will I just be sitting in bed waiting for you?"

The very thought of never knowing what would happen. Like I at any minute I could just wake up and he was ripped from my life.

"Well, I don't plan to but.....I've already taken care of all that." Jake says "if that happens...."

Jake holds his finger up to me. "And I mean if..."

"Mo'at and you will be the first to know. If I am in pieces I would like to be cremated, if I'm whole then I'll let you two decide what you want to do. I think you both have a right since you both will be the one who will visit me." He explains

His hand tangle into mine and I never actually thought about what would happen when the time comes. My heart sinks and I feel almost sadden by the hypothetical.

"The home is yours, everything is yours. The fields, the lands, the people will be at your service. Don't hesitate to ask them for anything. Everyone is prepared especially since you almost died I made sure to prep my people for when my time comes."