Use Me, Darling

Part 55

Tay had left the house without saying goodbye to anyone. He had parked his car after a couple of minutes of driving and now stared back into the traffic, waiting for his thoughts to sort themselves again and give him an answer that he could work with. He had no idea where he was supposed to go. Before he had left, he had sent a message to Vegas, telling him that Kinn knew about them, and had kicked him out. He told Vegas not to worry and that he would find a place he could stay at. His heart wanted to get away as far as possible. Just drive for a couple hours and maybe end up all the way in the north in a small town where no one would know him. But he couldn't. He had classes, he still had his duties to fulfil. Even though he wasn't happy with the way, his father had treated him, he still couldn't let him down, at least not until he was done with university. Without a degree he was useless, at least that was what Tay thought of himself. He was not good at anything, apart from classes. He had no interest, no hobbies, that would provide for him. If he ran away now, his father would close the money flow and he would be required to make money on his own. But how was one like Tay supposed to do so. He had always had money, never needed to worry about the struggles of life and where his next meal would come from. He was spoiled and his living standards too high. Tay would probably only be able to survive for a couple of days, before he would run out of money and probably die on starvation. Tay was sure of all these things.

With a sight, Tay started to drive again. He had decided what to do. He probably would regret that decision later. But he wasn't able to stay away for forever. His heart was racing as he pulled up the driveway to his home. His father's car was gone, at least Tay had some time left, to prepare for the coming storm. Carefully he entered to building. Even though his father wasn't there, he still wanted to avoid people as much as he could, which was easier this late in the evening as most people had already gone to bed and didn't roamed around the floors to follow their assigned tasks. His room had gotten cleaned since he last had been in it. Someone had tidied up the mess he had left, as he quickly had grabbed his things the last time he had been here. A sense of comfort rolled over the boy as he sucked in the smell of his room. Softly smiling he let himself sink onto his bed. He was happy to be back in his room, to have his comfortable bed and the big bathroom. It wasn't like Kinns place had been bad to stay at. Not at all. He was thankful for every second that Kinn had allowed him to stay there. But his room and the comfort he got by just being here, was something that he did not want to miss. He closed his eyes and finally let the tears, that he had been holding back ever since Kinn had entered the room to confront him about Vegas. He didn't want to show any weakness, so he pushed through, stayed strong but now he was back, alone in his room and no one would know if he showed his weakness again and again. Soft sobs left his mouth. It was his fault, undeniably, he should have known better. He should have resisted the temptation. He now had betrayed his best friend, the only person that had been with him through thick and thin. Kinn had every right to be mad, to be upset, to yell at him and never wanting to see him again.

Vegas had sent him a couple of messages that Tay had tried to ignore till now. "I hope you are good. If you can't, find a place to stay, text me, I will figure something out. No matter what Kinn will do to me. I will be happy as long as I know that you are by my side." Tay swallowed. His words made him want to cry again. He didn't knew if he would be able to stay at Vegas side. Maybe it would be for the better, if he stopped seeing Vegas and slowly earned back Kinns trust. Maybe he could forget about Vegas quicker then he had expected. He wrapped himself tightly into his blanket. Hiding from the world.

He didn't knew how he motivated himself to get up the next morning. He only knew that he had done it. That he had gotten dressed and even managed to drive to class. Surprisingly his dad still hadn't returned home. The room was still empty as Tay entered. Tay let him self sink into the wooden chair all the way back and rested his head on the shaky table in front of him. Why was he here, why didn't he just stayed at home and let his sadness win?

__________________________

Oh well. Poor little Tay, all alone in the world again.