Use Me, Darling

Part 14

Conjoining arms, the two boys left. It hurt to act like nothing had happened between the two of them. With big smiles on their face they left, however in the inside Tay was crying. He wanted to escape this situation more than anything. It was too painful. Behaving as if Time never did something wrong, felt more than wrong. It felt like Tay lost all his honor by holding onto his arm. Like he was betraying all of his morals. As soon as the two of them stepped food into the entrance hall, they were dragged into a thousand conversations. Questions from left and right flying upon them. It stressed Tay out, to stand there and listen to all those questions, acting as if he never had been happier. He wanted it to stop. To let it finally end. As his eyes hastily rushed through the room. Till he met the pair of eyes that he had been avoiding all night. In the eyes of the person on the opposite side of the room, laid a touch of anger and frustration, however as he had met eyes with Tay, his gaze softened. At least that was what Tay fought. For some reason, the intense starring calmed Tay down. His breath got slower, and he finally felt like his mind was able to settle a bit. "Shall we go Tay?" Time whispered into his ear, Not noticing the trance that Tay had been in, since his eyes had met Vegas. His words seemed to be a little wake up call. Finally, he took his gaze of him and looked back at Time. He only nodded, with a last glance at Vegas he left together with Time. Again, the whole way back to his place, he didn't said a word. He just stared onto the road. Following the lights that flashed by. Vegas was still stuck in his head. The way he had looked at him just now, seemed to be burned into his conscious.

"Can I stay a little bit with you. I just miss youso much and want to simply enjoy your presence." Time said, as soon as the carcame to a stop. Tay just shrug his head. The evening had tired him out. Hedidn't want to see or speak to anyone anymore. He just wanted to enjoy a glassor two of wine, while lying in his bathtub watching his favorite shows. "PleaseTay. I miss you so much" Time tried to reach for his hand, but Tay was quicker.He swiftly left the car and ran up the stars to his house. Ignoring Timesshouting as he entered and shout the door behind him. Slowly he took the stairswalking unstable as if he had just run the most exhausting marathon. He justhad let himself slip into the warm water as his phone announced a message. Itcouldn't had been for Time, as he muted his chat already. A number unknown tohim and his phone had sent him a message online. "So, you are back with him?"confused Tay looked at the message. Only a couple people knew about what hadhappened between Tay and Time and all of them were saved in his phone. For ashort second he hoped that it was Vegas, but that seemed just like stupidthought to him. "Who are you, that gives you the right to care about mypersonal life?" yes, his answer was a little harsh. However, no one was supposedto know about what had happened, he put on such a good act tonight, that he didnot want his walls to crumble. "I think I have the right to know, after ourlittle shared night a couple days ago." Tay nearly dropped his phone into thewater. It really was Vegas that texted him. "What do you want Vegas?" Tay heartwas beating faster, however, he could not let Vegas know about that. He neededto be his usual self. "Why do you care what I do. You were a one-night standnoting more. You don't need to care about what I do." He wanted to put hisphone away and focus on the show a little more. But his eyes were glued ontothe screen waiting for a replay. "What if want to make more out of. Like atwo-night stand." Tay nearly laughed at Vegas answer. It was stupid. It wassilly. But it made Tay for a short moment happy and forget about the stressfulevening he had. "No thank you. I cannot risk anyone discovering that I haveever slept with you. You are well below my dignity." Tay tried to keep hisstrong front on, but it was hard reading those cheeky texts. "No one needs toknow. We are just going to meet up in a small motel, where no one knows us.Only for the sex, no emotions attached." "I am not someone that you sleepsaround with anyone. I have class. Now please delete my number." "I am notanyone, am I. You already had sex with me once, if you don't have sex with mefor another time, you are becoming the person that sleeps around with anyone. Iknow you want me too. I have seen the way you look at me with those wanna fuckeyes." "Wanna fuck eyes, more like get fucked eyes. I am in a relationship andthat is not going to change. I am not going to cheat as I am very happy in myrelationship. Especially not with you." It hurt to write, that he was happy, ofcourse he wasn't however that was what he needed to behave like in order tokeep up the image that his father wants. "Happy. Just two nights ago you brokedown in my arms crying what an asshole Time is and now you are in a happyrelationship? Don't lie to yourself. You hate it and the only way you can getrevenge onto him, without it being revenge is to sleep with me behind his back.You and I both know it." He was right. No matter how much Tay wanted to deny it,Vegas was right. It was a small rebellion that he could do as long as no onewould find out about it. "I don't care about revenge. I am with Time. You arejust a night that I have nearly already forgotten about." Tay put his phone aside. He couldn't risk being seen with Vegas. He really couldn't. Frustratedand tiered of life he closed his eyes and let his body slip further down intothe hot water, till the tears he was crying were directly soaked up by it. Thewarmth of the water felt like a warm hug. Something that he really needed atthat moment. It was moments like this, that he missed his mother. She alwayshad open arms and ears for him, made him feel like he belonged. But since theaccident a couple of years ago, she had decided to stay in New York and slowlybroke of her contact with her family. Even though she was well and alive, itfelt to Tay like she had died already. She probably has already moved on, founda new family to rely on and care about. Sometimes Tay wondered how cruel hismother could have been to leave him here, alone with his father and this hardand cold world. No matter what her reasons were, they weren't enough to justifyabandoning your own child. His mind was spinning. A race of thoughts andimagines flying through his head. Flashing in front of eyes. Till Tay was so tied that he nearly fell asleep.