Four girls are huddled together in Normani's bed, they are having their usual girls night but this time Lauren won't be joining them since they went to visit their extended family over the weekend. Camila is about to tell them what Lauren told her earlier, well not exactly told her since the other girls is oblivious about the fact that she's awake. But that almost made her cry, hearing her say her thought about her aloud. It's always nice to hear and know that someone loves you for who you are, that you don't have to be someone you're not for them to like you. It's nice knowing it but it's nicer to hear them say it.
Camila wasn't stupid not to know that her girlfriend get sad and annoyed whenever she's so insecure about herself. But it's something she can't stop, no matter how much she want to. For her it'll be nice even just for a day you can go out of your own head, where you can escape it or make it stop. And right now she want to focus on the good, and share the story with the girls.
"I can still remember the way she speaks, like... I can't even put it to words" she gush, smiling like an idiot.
"It's just the two of you?" Normani asked for clarification.
"I guess, I was really asleep but then my heart start pumping crazily and I felt Lauren's presence" she smiled.
"Wow Mila you're whipped af" Dinah mused loudly.
"Lauren is too" Ally chimed in.
"Dinah one day you'll feel the same way with someone and say 'Now I know'" Camila said dramatically, imitating Dinah and failing miserably. That caused the other girls to laugh and she joined them because for her it is funny too.
"So you're not bothered about Phoebe hanging out with Lauren?" Normani asked, propping herself up using her elbows.
"I don't know Mani, I love Lauren and I know she does too. I trust her but I can't get this feeling out, like... ugh I don't know anymore." Camila groaned, and her endless thoughts came back.
"Honestly I do smell something fishy about that girl. I kind of don't like her" Ally said, and they all turned their heads to her. Ally always try to see the good in someone and always scolds them when they kind of judge them and hearing her say that surprised the girls.
"Where did you bring Ally?" Dinah said ridiculously, cupping the shorter girl's face and squinting her closer, she swatted her away laughing at her.
"What I mean is, she always follows Lauren and come on girls don't tell me you can't see the way she's flirting with Lauren" she added to make it more clear.
"Yes! Definitely. She's batting her lashes at her, I share one class with them and she's so clingy. It annoys me, and Lauren seem so oblivious." Normani butted in, rolling her eyes after speaking.
"What if Lauren would realize she likes her more? She's so beautiful, she laughs like an angel while when I laugh I look like a freaking orangutan. And they are so alike." Camila said sadly.
"Chancho we talked about this already right? And Lauren doesn't even care you know, because for her you are far way more beautiful than her." Dinah said wrapping an arm around her best friend.
"You know let's not ruin our night and watch movie instead." Normani suggested.
"Yay I'll be picking the movie today!" Ally cheered clapping her hands excitedly.
"Oh gosh, Ally please don't make us watch the Titanic again." Dinah pleaded.
"What's wrong with Titanic?" Ally asked with a accent and they laughed.
"That's so hilarious. We've watched it like 1000 times already" Dinah answered.
"Well today would be 1001" Ally grinned and they all groaned.
So like they said, they set up the DVD and watch silently, can you imagine your life without the person you cherish the most? Or like them, can you imagine if one of your friends left you? Do you think you can bear that? All of them were friends since they are young, used to being together everyday, and if one of them leaves will it be the same? Like Melissa Kantor said in her book "Some things once they're broken, they can never be whole again". So that's the thing Camila feared the most, not having one of them in her life. Especially Lauren, she knows that nothing is permanent in this world. But if she's going to change, or leave this place she'd like to think and hope that they will be with her till the end. She heard some sniffs and when she look at the TV she saw that they are already in the part where Jack is freezing, that part where he and Rose are talking. Maybe her mind wander for long that she didn't noticed that it's about to end.
"Why aren't you crying? Are you freaking cold hearted?" Dinah said wiping her tears and Camila laughed a little. Normani and Ally shushing her.
They didn't say anything and soon they are watching the credits roll, Camila have to fight the urge to burst out in laughter seeing their faces. She helped Normani clean their mess while the other two went to brush their teeth still talking about the movie.
*****
All of the other girls are now sleeping peacefully except Camila, it's 12 midnight and she and Lauren has been talking for over an hour now Lauren kept saying she miss Camila although they haven't be away for a day that's how their relationship usually is. They are so used to being together that when one of them is away they miss each other company. The brown eyed girl want to tell Lauren what she and the girls have been talking earlier, they never keep secrets from each other but there's a big part of her telling it is better to not let her girlfriend know.
"Lauren?" she called when the other line went silent. Camila can feel her with her, like they're just sitting side by side. If both of them are home she is 100% sure they are now sitting by their bedroom windows looking at each other with phones pressed on their ears.
"Hmm Camz?" Lauren hummed. She does miss her girlfriend with playfulness aside she's not to think she'll wake up and she won't see her smiling back at her. She have to wait until Sunday night to see her and the thought itself is killing her.
"You're not going to leave me right?" her emotions got the best of her that she wanted to let it go, a tear fell from her eye as she thought about the heart shattering moment if ever Lauren left her.
"Never, it's not going to happen... ever" Lauren said firmly because she mean it.
"Why do I feel like I'm going to lose you?"
"I'm not going anywhere baby. Please don't cry, I hate to know that you're crying and I can't go over to hug you because I'm not there"
"Don't ever leave me okay? Because I'm going to die if you'll leave me" she cried.
"Promise. Okay? I promise I won't ever leave your side, even we are thousand miles away I'm still with you. And besides I'm not going anywhere without you there. I made a promise to you when we were young that I'll always be right there, I made that promise again while we are growing up, I made that again when we are still best friends, I made a promise to you when I became your girlfriend, and right now I am promising that to you again. And I'm going to do it again, I love you Camila." Lauren said sincerely, hoping that it'll make her insecurities and doubts go away.
"I love you so much" she sobbed.
"And I feel the same way. Now stop crying because you are so beautiful to cry."
There's a pause before Lauren broke it.
"Baby are you smiling now?" Lauren asked cutely.
"Yes" Camila answered smiling.
"There we go. I love you so much Camz"
"Thank you Lauren"
"You're always welcome my love"
"Are we going to sleep?"
"Yeah?"
"Yeah"
"...."
"..."
"Good night"
"Good night babe"
.......
