Lauren brushes off the dust on her grandma's thomb, as kneel to put the flowers down. Ever since her grandma died she always go here, sometimes she goes with her grandfather but most of the times by herself.
It wasn't like she haven't accepted the idea of her death, her dad talked to her about it already. But she still misses her grandma so much. She can't just pretend that it doesn't, like Mike told her then she would be in denial.
A tear escaped her eye and she let it, no one will see her anyway. Hoping that it will ease all the pain she has been feeling.
"Hey grandma" she spoke, her lower lip trembling.
"I still wish you didn't left. I want you so badly to be here" she wiped her eyes to have a better view.
"We only have a week left until graduation. Can you believe that? The five of us would be college girls soon" she shared a hint of happiness in her voice. She may look stupid, talking alone here in her grandma's grave but she don't care.
"I bet it would be so much cool if you're still here. Then during vacation you would call all of us and will tell all of those cool stories from your past. The girls misses you too grandma. Our friendship isn't exactly so good but.... it's so hard. Maybe if you are here then you can scold us just like before. I know that it's all my fault though, I lost Camila as well. The only person who put up with me and I am so lost. I don't know how to fix all of this. I am losing grasp of everything, it doesn't feel good" she sighed, another batch of tears coming out from her eyes.
"You told me that I should stand up for what I believe in. Lately I wasn't good at doing that" Lauren took a shaky breath and swallowed the lump in her throat.
"I miss them so much, especially Camila. Nothing is the same, I can see that they are doing everything to put back my life on track but as Camila said I should clear up my head because they can't do that for me."
....
"I can't wait to see you again. I know you are doing good wherever you are. I promise I would fix everything, I'll give everything I can. Always look after us. I'll go for now. Te Amo" she said her goodbyes before she stood up, dusting off her pants, and walked away.
Lauren's mind is still clouded with thoughts she doesn't know who she will go and talk to.
It's amazing how much can happen with a short amount of time. Last year during the same day, she was so excited to spend the whole summer with her best friends and Camila. And now look at her, she doesn't have them. All the she have left is a broken friendship and relationship.
It feels like yesterday when she and Camila are snuggled up in the sun lounger promising each other things they actually thought would happen. She was stupid to give up everything for someone she thought she have feelings for.
She know everyone has been so kind to her despite of everything she did wrong. A lot of times and chances were given to her but she took them all for granted.
Her head is hanging low as she walk on her way home, tears won't stop falling from her eyes. Since when did she become such a cry baby? And to think no one's here to comfort her, hurt her even more.
Due to Lauren, not looking on her way she bumped into someone. She doesn't know how to act or feel as she realized who she collided with. She stood there frozen staring at her. Fresh tears visible and it's too late to hide the fact that she's been crying.
Before she can do anything, she was enveloped into a warm hug. The arms feels all too familiar, the inviting vibe made her melt and give in.
"Ally" she sobbed onto her friend's shoulder, her hands balled into fist, holding onto her shirt. Relief wash over her as she hug her best friend.
