After Lauren came all Camila did is cry, now that she knows Lauren reason she can't help but think, she feel so sorry for Lauren... she has no idea she was feeling that way, if only she knew. And now she's starting to regret for wasting their precious time worrying if even she's good enough for her when all along Lauren is also feeling the same way. In a way they are the same the only difference is Camila have someone to bent to, and Lauren doesn't because she feel that she have to strong for the both of them. Lauren is right, although the pain didn't left, at least now she heard her side and found out she didn't just threw away their relationship.
All she want to do is to say sorry to her and make her feel that Camila now got her back, that she could show her vulnerability too. What Camila hates the most is because of her Lauren felt the she have no one and that her friends only take her side. Maybe it seem like that she knows it's not the case at all. Their friends never take side, they listen to both of them. Or do they?
Camila has been so blinded by the love she have for Lauren that caused her to not see other things. She was so busy being worried about her insecurities she forgot that maybe Lauren is also dealing with them. It's too late now and the only thing she can do is to regret them and live up with the situation.
It's been a while since someone came to her room, and she jumped a little when the door bursted open revealing her friends who all look so worried.
"Mila what did she tell you? Are you okay? I swear if she did something I myself would confront her and hand her, her own shit" Normani said rushing to her side.
"No. Don't do that" she said wiping her tears.
"Sinu told us she came here and that you've been crying since" Ally said with a frown brushing Camila's hair out of the way.
"We talked. And I hurt her too, she's not okay. I mean... I don't want you to get mad at her" she explained not quite clear, confusing her friends.
"Mila what are you talking about? If you heard what she told us earlier you'd be mad too. She's a total bitch Mila" Dinah ranted breathing heavily.
"She was just mad, hurt and confused. Try to at least understand her" it's ironic how she's defending her now and asking her friends to understand Lauren not giving them an explanation. Sounds so familiar right?
"Why are you defending her Mila?" Ally asked like she can't believe her.
"Because now I know why. Why she left me" she said simply.
"I don't get it" Normani huffed in frustration.
"I know. I can't tell you anything. But girls you know Lauren more than anyone. We've been together since we were young. It's not easy for her. It's hurting her too, it's been hard for her or at least it was" she explained a little hoping it would be enough for now.
"Okay Mila" Ally said in understanding and she shot her a thankful glance.
"That still doesn't change the fact that she just left us" Dinah reasoned.
"Yeah and how she treated us earlier" Normani added. Camila gave them an apolegitic and sad smile.
After a while she held out her arms asking them for a hug smiling a little. They did grinning at her. They separated.
"I love you girls. I want you to know that I couldn't ask for any other friends. I don't know if I would still be here if it weren't for you. Sorry if sometimes I make you feel I don't appreciate you. But I do, and I am so grateful I have you every step of the way" she spoke softly, wiping her tears.
"Camila" Ally choked hugging her and soon the other two joined them.
"We know. Just get better okay? You'll get through this" Normani said now with determination and hope for Camila to be better.
"I will" Camila nodded. Her answer firm and now she mean it. She know she'll be okay. Not only for everyone... mostly for her own.
*****
It's been a week and yesterday she was released from the hospital the doctor said she already recovered and her immune system is now stronger. She also gained back her weight and she is getting better.
She haven't seen her sister, the therapist said it's for the better. She was in shocked after she saw her sister lying lifeless on the floor but after some counseling and a talk with her mom she got better although she still don't quite understand it that's okay for now.
She is now in a car with her mom who's talking about how excited Sofi is to finally see her again and a fond smile formed from her lips.
Her school works is being send to her via email her best friends help her with some lessons. The school said she can come back whenever she feel like she is ready and she can take as much time as she can. They are glad that they are understanding enough with her situation.
But before she go home she want to ask her mom something. Maybe this would be her last for now. She want to get better and she think that this is her first step to do that. This is the start of her new life without having Lauren in it. It still hurts but she doesn't have much of a choice and she's choosing now not just going with the flow. She know she'll get better, she just have to have some faith in herself for it to happen.
"Mom can we go see dad?" She asked out of a sudden, the initial shock her mom is in made her step on the brake and faced her.
"I.. uh Mija" she stammered.
"Look mom. I know everything. When and How? I'll tell you, I promise that okay? I just want to see dad. If you're not ready to see him you can drop me off and I'll take the bus. I just want to start a new life mommy, and I want everything to be okay this time. By my own and not anyone doing it for me. You just need to trust me. I know we haven't talk properly about this whole situation but we will. Please?" She pleaded looking straight at her.
Her mom looks taken aback for a moment and nodded whispering an okay after a moment. She smiled thankfully at her and she smiled too.
Unlike earlier her mom is quiet now, glancing subtly at her from time to time. Her mom took the opposite road and it means she herself is familiar with the place and it made her a little happier.
They stopped in front of her dad's house, ther were quiet until she glanced at her mom with a look of sadness and understanding.
"Are you going to wait for me? Would you be okay?" She asked.
"I will. Just don't mention it to him okay? Take your time darling" her mom said softly rubbing Camila's arm for reasurrance. She nodded and went out of the car.
She doesn't have to knock, as always.. because the door is already wide open as if it's always waiting for someone to walk in. She saw Nancy who appeared from the kitchen. She was surprised when the woman suddenly grabbed her hand leading her to the back door.
"Oh Camila you're gonna be happy to see him and he will be too" she cheerfully said.
And for the first time she saw her dad standing unlike before he just sit there on the couch motionless but now he's walking looking at the plants. He turned around and when he saw her, he is smiling. It made Camila's heart jump in joy seeing him like that for the first time since he and her mom's split.
"Mija?" His tone is happy and he walk half way to meet her.
"Oh my God daddy, you're back. You're really here" she breathed hugging him tight. A sob left her lips, but now she's crying because of too much happiness and not because of too much pain.
"Daddy I'm so glad. I mean.. this is so great. Like, Oh Gosh" she rambled grinning at him, Alejandro wiped away Camila's tears smiling down at her daughter kissing her forehead lightly.
"I am too Mija. It's all because of you. Thank you" he said, it feels weird to hear him speaking and moving.
"What do you mean daddy?" She asked confused.
"Sit down, we have a lot of catching up to do" he said, guiding her to their ussual spot and gave her a genuine smile which she returned. Maybe things will really get better after all.
