Keeping up with The Carters

Odd S2E9

Episode 9: Odd
Bey pov
January 26th  
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Since me and nika got back together I've been swamped with weeks of work that I didn't do while we weren't together and my kids are very aware but still wants to stress me out. I try not to hit my kids but they make it so hard not to.

B: STOP RUNNING IN MY D*MN HOUSE! And Giselle come here!

G: yes?

B: what happened to that turtle I got you??

Her eyes went big.

G: no entiendo

B: yes you do entiendo! What happened!

G: no habla ingles

B: lil girl ima ingles my foot up yo behind!

Gigi runs off.

Kh: you're gonna English your foot up her behind?What does that even mean??

B: I- boy go somewhere and stop easedropping! Go read a book!

He sighs going upstairs.

You see what I mean? They just like to piss me off. Between Giselle's duolingo a** and Khalil wanna be a know it all I can't take it!!

S: FREEZE!

I blew my breath looking up to the sky.

S: YOURE UNDER ARREST FOR YELLING PUT YOUR HANDS WHERE I CAN SEE EM!

B: Sir please go sit down, mommy have something really important to d-

S: TELL IT TO THE JUDGE INMATE

He pulled out black handcuffs with fur on them. Beyoncé eyes went wide and she immediately snatched them away.

B: boy! Give me these!

S: hey! That's not fair I'm the cop

B: no go play something else

I gently pushed him out the kitchen. Lord have mercy.

Kh: mom I was thinking, I wanna be a rapper

I rolled my eyes.

Kh: ready for my freestyle

Beyoncé looks at the camera.

Kh: uh it's me and bey, and we coming 50 deep, don't play with me cus we gon get you in your sleep, so creative n*ggas gotta b-i-t-e, call me jayz cus I like em 16

B: what?

Kh: long a** racks and a long a** neck, think the uh oh girl gon retire next, yall ain't tired yet, ego where it's at, cus when I come they'll say I'm the best thing they never had

B: okay that's enough-

Kh: hold up wait ian finish, allat hollering on bday and they still ain't listen, put cowboy Carter on Spotify and they still ain't streaming, and on 16 carriages you lied cus you ain't cooking or cleaning-

B: Khalil

Kh: Hold on, can I get another verse, how you put a ring on it then cheated first, how your back so big you got a frenchys purse, still messing up lyrics you had months to rehearse, all them Grammys but still not album of the year, made a whole song and that man still don't care, where the visuals at cus they still ain't here, say you a singer but you playing with hair OHHHHH

B: I'm bout to slap the sh*t out you

Kh: hater, I'm gonna be the greatest rapper alive!!

B: oh my gosh

Ka: mommm!

I looked up seeing her wet face.

B: what's wrong?? Why are you crying?

Ka: I'm so stupid! I did it again

B: what did you do?

Ka: she made me cry again and I let her!!

B: baby..

She's been talking to some lil girl for two years on and off and it's been stressing ME out more than anything. They think I'm Jerry springer or something.

Ka: I don't why I can't let her go she made it clear more than once she wants nothing to do with me but the stupidest part of me keeps thinking we're gonna talk again but it's been 7 months and I know she's not even thinking of me!

B: aww baby I know it can be tough to let go of someone we care about, but sometimes holding on to false hope can be more painful than letting go

I pulled her closer and listened.

Ka: she's all I talk about and all I dream about and I don't even cross her mind not once because she's like boys and I'll never be a boy, I'm so stupiddd!!

B: you're not stupid honey, you're just 16

I rubbed her back.

Ka: I wish I never met her she ruined me!

She started crying harder.

B: sweetheart it's okay I know right now this feels like forever but in a year from now you won't even remember her name

Ka: I'm never gonna get over it! I already know and she's gonna get married to someone elseee

She started sobbing into my chest. Like a full on break down..

B: oh baby

All I could really do was hold her at that point. What do you even say to that???

Kh: are you crying over the girl who's been f*cking since she was 14?

Ka: shut up Khalil!

Kh: she's probably gonna get a deadly STD and die from it then she could never get married!

She sniffled raising her head up.

Ka: yea..or maybe she'll be infertile then she can't have kids by anyone else

Kh: exactly!

Ka: that made me feel much better, thanks Khalil

She wiped her tears and walked off like that just happened. Okay...

B: you guys are odd..

We both chuckled. Only my kids. I love em tho.