Keeping up with The Carters

Ephemeral S3E32

Jay POV
Episode 32: Ephemeral
June 3rd
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I sat at the top of the bed holding bey's waists. Wrongfully.

"Ooh right there baby"

She threw her head back.

"Please don't stop I don't want it to stop"

I thought she meant that sexually but really? She probably was talking more about the rush and feeling it gave her instead.

Every time we'd finish she would lay on her back with a look of dissatisfaction, mad that the feeling left as quickly as it came. I didn't want to feed in Beyoncé's bad coping skills she had with sex but I felt guilty turning her away knowing I caused her this pain. So we went a few more rounds, it felt good but still wrong.

Incoming Call from Sydney

I glanced over at my phone then back at bey nervously.

"You gonna answer?"

"nah its fine-"

"you wanna answer...go take the call" She stared at the pillow next to us.

"no im here with you I wont answer"

"I can't stop you from turning you head so just...go"

"bey"

She stood up covering herself with a robe and walked back to her room. I sighed answering.

"Hey"

"Hey baby, how are you?"

"Uh I'm good how's things with you?"

"I went to doctor appointment and she said next visit we can find out the gender"

I chuckled. "Oh woww that means this is real huh?"

"Yeah and you know I don't even wanna do a big party I just want it to be you and me at dinner"

"Okay we can do that"

"Okay, have you...gotten any news about your mom?"

"Just the same ole thing, I was gonna go up there today to see myself"

"Okay honey just take it easy okay?"

"Alright, I'll call you later"

"Okay"

We hung up, I got out of bed to go in bey's room. She was laying in bed typing on her phone I flopped on the bed making her smack her teeth.

"Beyyy"

"What"

"You still mad at me?"

She didnt say anything but I could see her trying to hide her smile so I tickled her.

"You still mad??"

"Stoppp jay!" She laughed.

"Oh good you're not mad anymore" I pulled her back with my arms around her so we were both lying down.

"Shut up I am mad"

"Well you wanna go with me to see my mother?"

"Lowkey...no"

We both laughed.

"I don't wanna be a bitch or nun but I don't really like that lady"

"I feel you. It's weird because she wasn't a good mother and she wasn't a good person but she's my mother and she's sick...so I kinda feel bad for not feeling bad?"

"That's understandable, I don't think you should beat yourself up about it...about anything"

I sighed pinching the bridge of my nose.