Rejected by one Alpha, Loved by another

Chapter 79: Millie

Millie's POV

Dear Diary.
Since my therapist told me to write in my journal every day I decided I may as well do it now that I'm on my way back from my parents house.
I've spent the last 5 days having my mom hugging me close, keeping an eye on me and feeding me because she assumes I'm underweight.

Her Luna instincts are top notch that's for sure. She never could understand why I didn't want to stay in the pack house and work my way up like my sister did but I guess you had to have one child who needed emotional therapy and medication.
That's me.

My twin sister, Poppy, she's great. We are so alike and so different that talking and laughing at the same time became our biggest issue. We are too in tune with each other and I think that's what annoys our father the most.

Alpha Jaxon Hayes.
My dad.
Best dad ever.

I guess sitting in an airport listening to music and zoning everyone out is all I needed. I've gotten better with going out and I must admit, it feels nice to be going back to school. I managed to get a week off my time table so I could go and spend family time back in Portland.

I love my hometown and I love the pack but when I went to UCLA for a tour of the figure skating rink and what I could be doing I knew I'd want to go there.
My mom taught us how to skate from such a young age, every opportunity we got we would be on the ice and I learnt how to do different stunts from an early age too but right now... I can't wait to spend the next few days locked away in my dorm room with Netflix and some ice cream.

Anyway.
I've done my daily writing routine and now I'm going to grab a drink and a cookie for my flight and I'll speak soon.
Millie - Out.

"Flight 821 please proceed to boarding gate 33." The announcement comes through just as I pack away my belongings and head toward the gate heading back to LA.
Don't get me wrong, Portland is beautiful. It's that sort of country that if you preferred forests and closures that meant you were free to be yourself in, that is the place for you and as wolves, we like to be free and run in that wild crowd. We love to be able to be free and explore the nature around us.

I got my wolf at 18 just like my sister did, my brother got his at 17 as he's been brought up as an Alpha Male. Our cousin, Zach is his Beta and his best friend Noah is his Gamma. They are all close friends and have been since kids.

My sister Poppy is the one people adore most. She loves going to the family functions and giving herself to that mystery of life. Me on the other hand...I prefer to be closed off.
I suffer greatly with anxiety which always gets worse when I get to school.

I love my school. Classes are going well and I have a few friends who I stick with always but there's always those girls who have to be everywhere and know everything.
No one knows I'm a wolf. No one knows that every full moon I should turn.
I should turn but that's the thing with moonlight rings that hold magic.

Our witches in our pack are great at what they do, for teenagers and adults who want to go to college but don't want to shift they can have the ability to control their inner wolf. Zia, my wolf is always there.
Normally when I feel like crap I turn to her but everything I do recently feels strained. Restricted in some ways.
I don't turn as much but when I do, I can go days without turning back. I've had calls and notifications from my family in regard to my whereabouts but I don't know how to respond to it sometimes.

I'm a lost cause.
Yet tonight is all my sister kept speaking of.

Speaking of family.
Incoming dad alert.

"Hi dad"

"Baby, you do know it's the Gala tonight right? Pops said she tried to convince you to go but you didn't want to?"

"Dad" I sigh into the phone. "I'm just-"

"What's wrong honey?"
I've heard the stories of how my mom and dad met. I've heard how her previous pack taunted her and nearly killed her and if it wasn't for my uncle Finley and my dad, she would have probably died. I want that kind of love.
I want the earth shattering, soul crushing kind of love that it hurts to even think of my partner being away from me.

"Mills?"

"Sorry dad. I'm just scared okay. You know me, it's easier this way" and I'm making excuses once again but I can't help myself. My family are my rock and I have never once felt left out, hurt or used by them but sometimes I let my mind travel to the 'What if things changed and they didn't need or want me anymore?' Kind of scenario.

"Millie, baby of course you're scared. It's not easy being an Alphas daughter and it sure as fuck-"

"Dad!"

"Oh pack it in. Do you know how many curse words me and your mother have heard you and your sister say over the years when you thought we weren't listening?" He says and I can hear the smile when he speaks.

"You heard it all?"

"Wolf hearing Princess. Of course we heard it" he says and my own smile appears because it's my dad who's making me smile once again.
They all know the struggles I've had. The panic attacks and anxiety attacks over the years. The hospital visits and mental health checks. I mean they always told me I was special but I never believed why.

"This is the final reminder for passengers of flight 821 travelling from Portland International to LAX to proceed to boarding gate 33. Doors will be closing shortly"
Once again I feel rushed. I feel like everything works out so well only for something other than plans to happen.

"Dad! Dad I have to go, my boarding gate closes soon"

"You can always come home princess. Then I have all 3 of my kids here with us"

"Dad...please, please don't make me cry" I plead into the phone. The last thing I really want to do is cry right now.
As I'm walking through the crowded walk ways with people pushing pushchairs or carry on luggage or shops luggage I smell the faintest of scents hit me.

Pine mixed with something else. I'm not quite sure what though but it's a beautiful mix.
Pine.

"Millie?"

"Sorry dad! I have to go I love you so much okay I will call you tomorrow" I tell him as I rush to my gate now.

"Okay princess! Safe travels I love you too!"
I forget about the scent.
I forget about everything In between.

I made my way to gate 33 and once I was seated I pulled out my iPad with my headphones ready for when we was up in the air, and I closed my eyes listening as the vibrations and sounds of the engine start before take off.

"Hi, is this seat taken?"
I look to my right and find another young female. Can't be any younger than me and she looks nervous to ask.

"No, I mean, it's yours if you want it" I tell her as I move some of my things over.

"Thank you. I'm Natalia. What's your name?"

"Millie. Millie Hayes" I say shaking her hand to be polite.

"Where are you heading to after this flight?" She asks as we begin our takeoff. Everything I'm feeling right now bundles down to the nerves of facing everyone back at school.
Sasha being one of them.

"LAX. I go to UCLA. What about you?"

"No way!" She says excitedly but quietly.
"That's where I'm heading too! I'm looking at living off campus though" she says looking at her notebook. I can't help but over look at her sketches.

"Are you an Art major?" I ask her as I settle into my seat. Take off wasn't that bad but the turbulence we are  going through is annoying. I hate it.
"I am. I've just transferred on a scholarship to get my degree for Art and design. What do you do?"

"I'm a figure skater. I've just been home to visit family and now I'm on my way back to college. I umm...I do have a spare room to rent if you are interested" I say scratching the back of my neck.

I haven't shared a home or my space with anyone since I left for college but the idea doesn't half scare me as it did if I had suggested it on my first year or even second year here.

"Really!!"

I smile at Natalia and nod my head. The feeling of dread settles in my stomach at anything that could possibly go wrong. "Yes" I say and before I know it, I'm engulfed in a hug.
"Oh, okay"no say patting her back awkwardly.