The App: App-ocalypse (1)

Day 14 - Meeting in the kitchen

What I feared all day yesterday finally happened: Adriana and John told Georges, Anna and I to come to the kitchen. It felt like a trap. I saw Anna's face and I knew that even if she was pretending everything would be fine she was scared by that meeting.

Luckily it wasn't as bad as I expected it to be. They told us we were eating a lot - even if they noticed how hard I tried to eat only what I really needed. That was a normal thing to do at our ages but it couldn't keep going on because we were too many in the house.

I was expecting them to tell us to leave. It would clearly have been the normal thing to do after saying that. However Adriana and John aren't normal people. They only asked us to provide some food by ourselves. They want us to be useful to the house and the family we make.

They used the word family. I wasn't that wrong after all. They did like us as children. Sort of. And I already pictured ourselves leaving the house and saying goodbye to Michael... I felt a little bit stupid. Still I was angry at them for telling us to help them while we were already doing a lot - like cleaning or cooking or whatever.

After this odd meeting we went to old Mary's bedroom - the best place to talk without being heard. I was pissed off. I mean we are eating just as much as Anton - and no one expect Anton to do anything. It isn't fair to us.

Anna and Georges disagreed with me. Of course they were agree with each other. Just like old times... They told me Anton was Adriana & John's son and that it was his home. Therefore it was logical that they didn't ask him more. I still strongly disagree with them. He's their son? So what? He is eating as much as us. He should help us get some food. Period.

That's basically our new problem now: we have to find food and supplies. And we have to do that as discreetly as possible because we don't want anyone to find us. We figured out a plan: we saw other farms the night we came here. Our best shot is to look into each one of them to find some food. Yes our plan sucks. Our plan is basically screaming "Let's be robbers!". However we are forced to do that.

Actually we're not but it's what Anna & Georges decided. And I'm doing what they decide because I'm the youngest. I wanted to take Michael with us and to leave the farm. Definitely. I know how bold an idea it is however it feels like the easiest thing to do. Wait for the night, pack our things and go - just go somewhere else. I would be perfectly okay not to see any part of Anton again. I would be perfectly okay not to see Adriana's fake smile. I really like her but each time she smiles directly at me I can't help but think how much she resents us because we're eating her son's food.

Once Georges left the room, Anna told me leaving the farm would be a good option if only we had somewhere to go. We're stuck in here because it is our last safe place. We ran out of options a lot of days ago. We can't go back to the city (any city) knowing how risky it is. Here at the farm we're alone and in peace. Adriana and John asking us to help them feed everyone seems a fair move.

I have to admit it is. I'm just angry at the situation - even If I shouldn't be angry. That's it. I think I'm finally becoming the annoying teenage girl everyone expected me to be. Georges is constanly mocking me about that. But seriously how is it fair that Anton can "enjoy his time alone in his bedroom" while we're all working hard to provide food? Why can't we enjoy our time at the farm too? (it's not that I want to masturbate - I'm fine thank you - it's just a fact: it is not fair to have to help this lazy shithead and do all of his work. Is he a man or what?).

Well keep calm Eliza, keep calm and go to sleep. Tomorrow will obviously be a big day.