See You Later...[Sequel]

|The Viper Room|

In all honesty California was better then I hoped it would be. There isn't really a big climate change between the season here like in New York. There alot of places to go and things to see and in my opinion, I think the people are a bit friendlier. I've come to love 'the golden state'. And this final year of college was really promising, because after cleaning up my act freshman year and forcing myself to get all my classes up to about an A average I was able to be more leniant this final year with my classes for my major..which are all connected to film, but I do have alot of free time now. If I owe anything positive to coke it would probably be that when I fixed my attitude a bit, coke was what kept me calm and what made me focus on my work...it gave me the push, and the edge back. I guess I do it because it makes me feel better. When I'm sober...I find that I am really unpleasent to be around and talk to...I don't really speak or respond and I get agitated. I wouldn't necesarrily say that I'm "addicted" but I use it cus it is the better of me. Sure, I miss the old me...the Amanda that didn't need it...that looked forward to so much, the optomistic. Now I would say that after Charlie dieing...I have become pessimistic. I have no faith in anything, and often times I find myself wishing I was the one who got slammed by that semi and not him. So many people cared for him..he had so many friends. There is only about a handful of people who I can think of who actually give a fuck if I actually overdose to my death or not...but at the same time, only James knows that I use. I actually wonder what my family would say if they found out...or even worse, Robert.

As I walked down Sunset Blvd. after having to drive my ass all the way over to West Hollywood, I finally came up to the one bulding that stuck out on the whole strip, The Viper Room which is painted pitch black..I wonder what Johnny Depp was thinking when he chose that color, I mean you would expect for such a high profiled club to look all glamorous, but on the outside The Viper Room looks like a runned down bar. I didn't mind that I had to meet James up here, I get that he had to setup with the band but I did mind being stuck in the huge crowd of people that waited to get in. Once I finally got in, I headed straight towards the stage, I hopped on up and walked into the back, thankfully secuirty wasn't around. And there was James adjusting his guitar strap, I walked over and took the cigarette hanging out of his mouth and pecked him on lips. A huge smile grew on his face, "Heyyy, you just got here?" "Yea the line outside was pretty crazy..it's a full house out there." his eyes widened, "Really? Oh man.." "Babe it's okay you 've performed live before." "Yea but never at a place as big as this...do you know what kind of people come here?" I thought about it, "Uh.....people who like music?" He blinked at me.."Yes but music producers, record label managers." That is a pretty big deal.."Oh, well it's okay babe you're an amazing musician. Think of this as your time to prove yourself." he finished fixing his guitar strap and smiled at me, "Did you by any chance bring the baggy I left you?" I looked in my purse, "Yea I stopped back at my room before coming here." He nodded and put his hand on my back while leading me to a secluded area, he took out his credit card and I took out a dollar bill, he did a line and then handed me the baggy and gave me a kiss, "I've gotta go warm up, but I feel better now, thanks babe." he kissed me again and walked away, I put the bag back in my purse and went back out and walked off the stage and into the crowd, I knew that the music industry was a tough thing to get into unless you're already famous...but I support James..I'm just glad he is doing his passion, because watching him suffer through his college medical examines was pretty bad, he is a genius..don't get me wrong, but only people who really want it can get by all the work and studying you need to do to become a doctor, it just wasn't James' thing.

James band was the opening act for The Black Keys...so I can see why he was kind of worried, but since I had time I decided to go to the bathroom and take a line myself cus the last time I had taken any was this afternoon. To my suprise the bathroom was pretty packed with other women, majority of them taking their own drugs. Some where popping pills, others were snorting just like I was about to, and others were smoking, I had already become basically a pro at snorting in tight small spaces so I just took out my bag and laid it out and took a line. I put my things away and went over to the sink to make sure that I looked okay...when I realized a girl who I was snorting by had been watching me, I looked at her and smiled awkwardly. She pointed towards her nostril, "You forgot some." I looked in the mirror and laughed, "Oh thanks." I wiped it off and looked at her, "Want some?" She opened her eyes wider, "Oh no...I...don't do that." I shrugged and gave her another smile before walking out of the bathroom. As I walked throught the crowd James' band was on stage they were about to start, I walked over to the bar, "Can I get a glass of Jack.?" "Sure thing." the bar tender said, "Jack Daniels? I like your style." a man said next to me...I looked at him as he downed the rest of whatever was in his glass he looked at me and smirked and I nearly screamed, "Jude? What...What are you doing here?!" he smiled..."I came to see The Black Keys..I've been intown, I'm meeting my girl's parents..we go back to New York tomorrow." I was still a bit shocked... "What a small world." he nodded, "Yea I know so why are you here?" I pointed to the stage, "That's my boyfriend." he looked over, "The fella with the crimson red guitar?" I nodded... "The singer and guitarist of Rise To Daze?" I nodded and smiled... "That band is pretty damn good. My girl has them on her ipod." "Yea they have some songs on itunes.." "What's his name?" "James Leon." he nodded and the bar tender handed me my drink, "James started to speak to the crowd and I looked at Jude.."Where's your girlfriend?" he shrugged..."She went to the bathroom." "So you're serious about her huh.." he turned to me and had a cheesy smile, "Yea...figured it's time to settle down, and she's pretty much everything I could want." then I realized something.."Um didn't Robert tell me you were married?" He rolled his eyes, "Yea we split up 2 years ago...she was a controling twat." I chuckled and shook my head, "Oh Jude...." I couldn't help but ask, "How's Robert?" he shrugged "Last I spoke to him was about a week before I came here on the phone, he's still teaching at Jericho.." he looked at me and smirked, "You're wondering if he is seeing someone aren't you.." I blushed and looked down, "I'm not sure to be honest, when we hangout he has gotten calls from a girl, I think her name is Marilyn and they hangout from time to time...but I don't know what they are." I looked up at him and nodded, I didn't know what to feel, one because I obviously have been moved on for like 4 years now....two I don't know if he is seeing this Marilyn, and three...because apart of me misses him so much..but I didn't want to think about him anymore. That's when a girl walked over and linked her arm in his, he looked down, "There you are, this is my girl Tara." I looked at her and we both smiled, "Yea we saw eachother in the ladies room." he smirked and kissed her, they look really cute together, I didn't want to be a cock block so I grabbed my drink and patted Jude's shoulder, "Well I'm gonna go over there....it was good to see you and meet you." I said while glancing at Tara. As I turned around Jude called me, "Hey Amanda!" I looked back at him, "Yea?" "Give Robert a call!" I looked at him for a second before frowning and mouthing 'No'. I turned back around and walked towards the front of the crowd, James' band had started playing and everone was loving them...escpecially the girls, but I never get jealous with James because he is so trustworthy...like I could literally trust him with my life and have no worries, and he never lied to me.