Damaged [Lucaya AU]

thirty-six :: maya meets the end

A/N: Despite the title of this chapter, this is not the last chapter lol

"I heard you have a thing for guy's whose names start with the letter J."

I turned around at the sound of my worst nightmare. My heart began to race, and I prayed to God that it wasn't who I thought.

But to my despise, it was.

Joshua Matthews, in the flesh.

He was wearing his usual beanie and jeans. His t-shirt was one I remembered from a long time ago. He seemed so hazed, and confused. His eyes were staring straight at me, but I felt like he had no emotion. His face laied still as I looked at him. For a slight moment I forgot what he has become.

"What are you doing here?" I said my voice shakey.

"I didn't like how things left off with us," Josh had one hand behind his back and another by his side.

"You really didn't have to come out here," I said, trying to keep Josh calm. Who knows what he would do if I upset him.

"No but I did!" He insisted, "You must have mistaken my affections towards you, because you seemed like you didn't love me anymore."

That's because I don't, I thought.

I felt like my body couldn't move. I was stuck in place like I was living a nightmare that I couldn't wake up from.

Suddenly I heard the Study Skills' hall doors swing open.

"You know what Maya?" Jacob yelled barging into the hallway, and once he saw Josh's back he instantly stopped.

"Jacob what are you doing?" I said my jaw tightened.

"Maya..." He said cautiously.

Josh was still staring directly at me when Jacob motioned something to me.

Jacob pointed to Josh's hand behind his back. Jacob made a fake gun with his fingers.

Which can only mean one thing. Josh has a gun.

"Josh, you love me don't you?" I asked him.

"Of course I do, why would you even ask me that?" Josh replied his tone getting more angry.

"If you love me then put the gun down." I said, hoping that he would fall for it again like he did on Halloween.

"Maya, I'll put the gun down if you come stay with me." Josh barganed.

"I can't I need to graduate," I tried to come up with an excuse.

I mouthed 'help' to Jacob, hoping he would get the hint. He did as he slowly backed away from the scene and ran into the nearest classroom.

Josh pulled the gun out and held it in between his hands. He fiddled with the trigger as I tried to control my breathing.

The school sirens went off telling every student on campus to go into the nearest classroom and to lock the doors.

And then realization hit, I was in the middle of a school shooting.

"Josh, you don't want to do this," I warned him.

"You have no idea what I have planned," He shook his head as he stepped closer to me.

He grabbed onto my arm and held the gun to my head.

He had me walk past all the classrooms. All the classroom door's had windows, so I could see all my classmates cry and shriek as I passed by.

I used to be able to run away from my past, and now it's caught up with me, and everyone knows.

Josh led me up the stairs and onto the roof of the school.

As we walked up my knees were getting weaker and weaker.

He held the gun tightly to my neck as we finally reached the top, and were on the roof.

Josh finally moved the gun away from my neck as he moved around the roof pacing back and forth.

"I had this whole speech I was going to say," He rambed, "But I think I know what I want to say now."

He walked up to me, getting so close his nose was almost touching mine.

"I loved you, more than anything Maya. And so what I gave you a couple bruises? That's nothing more than one soccer game. And then what do you do? You left me, I had nothing left Maya! And what did you do next? Oh yeah you hooked up with that Cowboy, like you actually have feelings for him! He's nothing more than a rebound. Let's be real Hart, you always wanted a bad boy, and when you finally did you backed away." Josh finally finished his speech leaving me tears, "What do you have to say?"

"You think I don't care about you, but that's a lie." I told him, "I know you aren't the same Josh you were when we met. I always, will care for you. I want you to get better. I could have sent you to jail."

Josh looked down at his feet, "So you don't love me anymore?"

My heart collapsed, and I felt like I was talking to the old Josh. More tears streamed down my face as I nodded.

Josh slowly lifted the gun up.

But not to me, he held it up against his own neck.