Shawn Mendes Imagines

Can We Fix This?

We both laid awake in bed but neither one of us said a word. The moon's glow shone through our bedroom window, acting as a night light in the dark. I laid on my side of the bed, on my back, close to the edge. Shawn laid on his side of the bed with his back faced towards me. A single tear that I had been trying to keep in slid down the side of my face. I quickly wiped it away with my left hand. The moonlight hit my ring causing the diamond to sparkle. My attention was drawn to it. I pulled my hand back and looked at my wedding ring. I had been wearing it around my finger for three years, but I was unsure how much longer it would remain there. Shawn and I have been arguing a lot these past few months. At first it was every once and a while but now it is almost everyday. I could sense the unhappiness and stress our constant arguing put on him, and I too felt it myself.

My mind flashed back to earlier tonight when Shawn and I had gotten into another argument. My chest clenched and my head pounded as the words he promised he would never say, but did tonight, looped in my mind.

"What now?" Shawn asked, annoyance evident in his voice. He rested his elbows on the kitchen island, rubbing his eyes with the palms of his hands. His wedding band was still wrapped around his finger.
"Why do you have to come home so late?" I asked, drying the only dinner plate I had to wash, my own. Shawn had missed dinner once again.
"Why do you have to ask so many questions?" He asked, crossing his arms on the island.

"Shawn, this is like the fourth time this week that you have been coming home late." I said, trying not to talk with anger. Shawn didn't reply, but instead nodded his head.
"Shawn? Don't you think I at least deserve an explanation? Where have you been?" I asked. I wasn't sure where he had been going or what he had been doing. Part of me cared about where he had been, and what or whom else he had been devoting his time too. Though, If he had been with someone else the other part of me wouldn't be surprised.
"I go to the studio. I write, I record. You know." Shawn mumbled, looking over at me from across the island.
"The studio?" I questioned. Me questioning him on something once again made him angry. He stood up straighter, anger and frustration evident on his face.
"Yes, Y/N. The studio. Were you expecting me to say that I've been with another woman?!" He asked, his face becoming red with anger. I shrugged my shoulders.
"I wouldn't be surprised." I replied. Shawn looked at me in disgust, likely hurt that I would think of him as a cheater.

"You know why I don't come home?" Shawn asked with squinted eyes, leaning on the island once again.
"I can't stand the constant arguing anymore. I'd rather be anywhere but here at the end of the day because I know that we'll get into another stupid argument!" Shawn admitted, making me feel the slightest bit of hurt even though I had figured that was the reason for his absence.
"Do you think I like arguing every freaking day?!" I yelled back, getting just as frustrated as him.
"Seems like it, you're the one who always starts it!" He replied.
"I start it?!" I questioned, slightly offended. Shawn laughed as if he couldn't believe what was happening.
"We are arguing right now because you come home late everyday!" I said. Shawn rolled his eyes.

There was a minute of silence that came over us. When I looked up at Shawn he was shaking his head. Shawn spoke up, keeping his eyes on the table top of the island.
"If I knew then what marriage was going to be like with you, I don't think I would have ever proposed." Shawn mumbled. The prickling sensation began in my eyes after the words had left his lips. I felt my heart sink to the bottom of my stomach. Even with the issues we were having now I would never regret our marriage. A single tear fell from my eye, but I wiped it away quickly. From the corner of my eye I could tell that Shawn had noticed my tears. He didn't say anything, it was like he hadn't even cared.

"So, what?" I questioned. Shawn looked up at me. He shrugged his shoulders.
"What do you want?" I questioned, slightly scared at where this question would lead us.
"I don't know Y/N, but I can't keep arguing like this. It's driving me mad. I'm at the point where I just want to throw my hands in the air and give up." Shawn sighed. I wiped another tear that fell from my eye. I kept my gaze on him, knowing that there was something hanging at the end of his tongue. I could see the thought in his eyes.
"If we can't get past this arguing... I want a divorce." He admitted. It was like I stopped breathing in that moment. He said the words he promised he would never say. I couldn't respond. Before my tears could fall like a waterfall I walked out of the kitchen, not being able to believe what I had heard but at the same time not surprised either.