Anxiety

My weigh in

Hey guys!

Thought I'd update you on my weight loss! 

This monday I had my first weigh in of the year and my goal was to drop 5 kgs, but I was sure I wasn't going to lose more than maybe 2 kgs. I lost 5,5 kgs! In a month! 

I am so proud and I know that this is all MY work. No one can do the work for me and I've been so good for a whole month! Four weeks of dedication, sweat  and planning. This weekend I'm going to spoil myself with whatever food I like for an entire day and then I'm back on track again! 

I don't think I will lose that much for February but I'm hoping to be below 70 at least, which I'm 2,5 kgs from. Or 3? I'm not sure haha. 

I have a few obstacles for this month and I'm excited and nervous because I have no idea how I'm going to handle them. 

1. I have my cheat day coming up:

- The cheating won't be a problem, but I'm afraid I'm going to flip and either feel like complete shit and regret everything I ate or I'm not going to be able to stop eating once the day is over. 

2. Going out with friends:

- I'm going to the movies with a few friends and they wanna head to this pizza place before we get there. First of all, pizza isn't healthy. Like, there aren't any healthy options when it comes to pizza. Second of all, popcorn isn't healthy. What do I even do? Order a sallad and then drink a diet coke? I don't know, and I find these situations so so hard. A part of me wants to be normal like my friends and have a regular fucking pizza but another part of me is yelling at me that I am so close to my goal and that I can't give up now. I'm considering having dinner at home and then I'll just have a diet coke and a bar or something for the movie. At the end of the day this is about me and no one else gets to decide what I should and shouldn't eat. 

3. Having a friend over for the weekend: 

- This is my best friend who I haven't seen in forever so I'm more than sure that she would understand my situation BUT  at the same time I want to enjoy every minute I get to spend with her. I'm aware that I won't be able to stick to my plan the same way as before but I'll solve that "problem" in another way. Another thing is that THAT weekend is a few days from my second weigh in. I mean, I don't feel like pushing myself all month and then have crappy food and gain the weight back. I'm sure that's not how it works anyways but you know, I'm worried. I'll just have less of everything and try to stick to my plan as much as I possibly can. It's going to be hard and all but hopefully it won't affect my weight loss that much. I've been considering skipping my cheat day to enjoy being with my best friend instead, but I don't know.. It's going to be hard not giving in to my cravings for that long and I feel like I should have a cheat day once a month. I'll just roll with it, I have a few weeks left to make up my mind. Ah I'm just so scared haha. What would you do?

(EDIT: this has been in my drafts for the weekend!)