Anxiety

I don't even know

Okay so the challenge ended there. 

I made it three days, wow, great job...

I'm in my room right now and It's really late and I have school tomorrow. 

School is literally killing me. 

I have so much to do and it's stressing me to the point where I cry myself to sleep. 

I'm actually on the edge right now. 

But I can't cry, because that's be selfish. 

My best friend is losing a family member in cancer and she's not going to school in a couple of days. 

I hate cancer. 

The thought of being alone in school is killing me and I don't know what to do. 

I have people to follow, I guess, but it's not the same thing. 

I feel so lonely and miserable and nothing goes my way anymore and I'm failing in school and I have one friend and I can't be there for her like I wish I could and I have to bake for school and I have to study and I have to take my best friend's spot in the cafeteria and sell cookies with some boy from the grade above me and I don't know him and I wasn't even on the list to start with but now I have to take my best friend's place as I said and I hate it I hate it I hate it. 

No one knows that I stay up this late. 

No one knows that I'm sad. 

No one knows that anxiety is killing me and that I can't take it anymore. 

No one knows that I'm in my room crying in the middle of the night because life is hell. 

I need 2014 now. 

I need to hug someone but I don't have anyone to hug except my parents and they wouldn't understand. 

I know that I am the biggest failure in history and that I can never do anything right. 

8 more days and this hell should be over. 

I hate school.

I hate anxiety. 

I hate myself.

And I hate cancer.