Tris is Alive: Aftermath

Chapter 12

Tobias POV

    "Please don't leave me Tris... we need to talk." I say, I can feel a few tears escaping my eyes. I've been as strong as I could ever since she came back, it all just hurts so bad. I don't know how to feel about all of this, she was dead... I thought I lost the love of my life. But she knew, she knew she was alive but she let me believe she was dead and hurt me more. I start crying even more and I feel so weak, I feel comfortable about crying in front of her but weak for doing so.

    I should be happy that she's back and we can finally be together, it just hurts that I went through that and a few people knew she was alive and then her with Bruno is something I can't get over. It's all just too much right now. I love her so much and that will never change, I just am hurting. She's sitting next to me and I just let myself feel everything, she slowly pulls me in her arms and I just let it all out. I let the past year and a half come out, all of the pain and hurt come out.

    I try so hard to calm myself down, I'm just so scared to lose her but at the same time it's so hard to be with her. I don't know what to do with her. She runs her hand up and down my back, I keep focusing on my breathing. I think of when I first met her, so brave.... So beautiful... but then all the pain of her death comes back to me. I feel the pain overtaking me.

Tris POV

    I see the battle within his eyes, one moment I think he's going to calm down and then the next he's breaking down once again. I don't expect this to be easy for him, I don't. I just don't know how to help him, I really wish I could. Maybe he would have done better without me, if I never would have came back he wouldn't have to go through this pain.

    "Don't say that Tris, I rather have you back. I want you back more than anything. To know you're not dead, that you're full of life...." He starts breaking down again, I guess I was thinking out loud again. I touch his back, wishing I could take this pain away from him. Wishing I could fix all of the things I did wrong. "Tobias...." I start but quickly realize I don't know where I'm going with this. He looks up at me, his eyes bloodshot red from the tears, I wipe my eyes realizing that I started crying too.

    "Tris... I'm trying... I'm trying so hard.... Just everything.... I don't know." He shakes his head.

    I sigh, "We just need to talk all of this out... it's going to be hard and it's going to take time, but we can make it through this. I know we can."

    He nods, "I don't even know where to start...."

    I hold his hand, "Take your time, I'm going to be right here."

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