PART ONE: MAKEUP
Lipstick: Chapstick
Eye shadow: Sunglasses
Eyeliner: Wire frame glasses
Blush: Be embarrassed
Concealer: Paper bag over face
Foundation: Shove the bricks and rocks below your house onto your face
Nail polish: Put nail polish on. Wait 1 day. Have to reapply it because of OCD
PART TWO: MAKEUP TRENDS
False lashes: Convince eyelashes to lie. Done.
Winged eyes: Buy tiny angel wings. Attach to eyes. Done.
Smoky eyes: Put tiny campfire under face. Done.
Faux freckles(I think that's a thing?): Take pen. Angrily jab pen all over face. Done.
Contouring: Break bones in face. Configure face to how you want it. Wrap head in bandages. Wait.
Nose job: Buy nose tiny toolbox. Tell it to stop being a jobless bum and go be a mechanic.
YOU ARE READING
Humorous Crap #Wattys2016
RandomThis is a book with stuff that's well, funny. I think. Probably not. Eh, who cares! Just read it!
