Letters to the front

Chapter 4 - A letter to the front

After that night, Sebastian avoided me like the plague. He was out from before i woke and didn't come back, i often sat in the chair, waiting for him, when i woke up there was a blanket covering me.The days passed by and all the time my anguish turned to rage, soon the day arrived for Sebastian to ship out. I got up at five in the morning and sat with a cup of tea at the table, at six a groggy and tired Sebastian emerged. 

My anger evaporated the moment i saw him. He looked exhausted, standing in his soldiers uniform looking like an extremely tired child. I ran at him and he pulled me into an embrace. He muttered my name over and over, kissing the top of my head. "Why have you been avoiding me?" i cried. He stroked my hair. 

"This is what i was trying to avoid" 

"What" i said, stepping away, almost tripping. 

"I didn't want you to get hurt, or myself for that matter" he said. 

"What d'ya mean?" i asked.

"I wanted stop this, because i knew i was leaving" he said wistfully, stroking my cheek. 

"We'll make it work!" i protested. 

"What if i'm injured? Or killed? You have your plate full worrying about Edward, i won't let you add me too it"  

"Too late for that" i said, taking his hand, he pulled away. 

"Alice no" he said sharply. My eyes welled with tears.

"I don't care for you that way, i'm sorry i led you on" he said. 

"That's not true!" i protested. 

He looked away and when he turned to me, his eyes were cold and his voice void of any emotion. "It is, believe what you like, it's the truth" he said coldly, "don't forget to leave your key when you leave, i'll send someone to check you've left in a few days" 

I looked shocked, he didn't even say bye. I sat stiffly, "thank you for your hospitality Mr. Galloway" 

He said nothing, just turned and left. The door slammed behind him and i slid to the floor, hands trembling and eyes blurred with tears. I screamed and through my cup against the wall. The rements of my tea fell the floor, shards of glass scattered everywhere. I got up and packed my things, i think i outstayed my welcome. I went and gave Ruby a brush before putting the harness on, i would have prefered to ride but couldn't manage my case as well as ride. "Walk on" i said, clucking my tongue. Ruby obiedently walked on, ambling along the lanes. I turned to take on last look at the house and my eyes narrowed, something inside me snapped and my heart iced, goodbye Sebastian. 

It was a warm day, butterflies were fluttering from one flower to the next, birds sang in the trees, the whole world seemed alive, meanwhile i was dying inside. Ruby's ears pricked back and forth, listening to the sounds all around her. I sighed haplessly and looked up, sunlight glinted through the tunnel of trees covering me. 

The sound of water gushing from the stream got louder and i looked, light danced off the waters surface, shining and shimmering. Open fields surrounded me, the hills prominent not far in the distance, right now i was in the low lands, the valley, somewhere in those hills, was my mother and father. My heart ached for my home, i missed my mother and despite everything, my father. I needed them more than ever and they turned their backs on me. I could see my Uncle's farm now, the battered gate lay open and i clucked Ruby into trot. I sat and watched as dust stirred and flew behind us, creating a cloud spiralling off the back of the cart. "Wohoa girl" i said, squeezing the reins, pulling her back to walk. My aunt rushed out to meet me, i jumped off the cart into her waiting arms, "oh Alice!" she cried.